Dead X-JW Who Cares

Mystery

This is probably more for me than any other thing. All I want to do is scream at his sisters of how much they missed by not associating with their brother. I want go out and shake sense into all of these people to live by shunning! Their Jehovah isn't going to do crap!

He was a different race, but since we "weren't" predjuice my parents could not stop the relationship. We went in service together, to get-to-gethers etc... We planned on marriage after graduation. When my parents found out about this they did everything they could to split us up. They came down hard on him about how the world would see us. Etc...

We ended up sleeping together. I wrote him a note, which his mother found, she in turn gave the note to the elders (my dad being one of them). We were DF'ed. I did the good girl thing and was reinstated about 10 months later. He tried for awhile, but was never reinstated. He had the chance for a basketball scholarship. He was popular and he didn't have to try to be something he wasn't with these worldly friends.

He ended up marrying a girl that he had gotten pregnant. They had a 3 kids. They divorced.

The following I found out from one of his sisters this morning:

He married again. They divorced. He married again and was raisng a 10 yr old boy that was neither his nor his wife's.

He became a decon in a Baptist church. He became a referee for baseball, softball, football and basketball. He had a good job and had moved up successfully in the past 10 years.

He died last night at 42 yrs. due to a blood clot moving and stopping his heart. Or something like that.

I called his 3 sisters to tell them how sorry I was. "I just hope Jehovah will forgive him. I know where he is right now, he isn't burning in some hell or watching me from heaven, he is dead, he is just dead."

"I saw him at our last family reunion; I wasn't able to really talk to him but I did see him. He is DF'ed you know, the elders said that we have FREE WILL of how to handle DF'ed family memebers, but we still knew it was wrong to assoicate to much with him."

(FREE WILL my ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

"I'm going to miss him so much. His wife just doesn't understand why we couldn't talk to him. I know how much he loved you, it really broke his heart when you two didn't stay together. It seemed like he was never happy after he graduated. It seemed like he was running or searching for something. All he had to do was open his heart back to Jehovah and he would have been happy again."

I want to scream! I want tell them how F----- up they are!

I looked for him, in stores, in his old neighborhood, I even went out to where he worked and set in the parking lot to see if I could see him leaving one time, when I went to visit my parents. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to find him to see if he had ever found peace outside of the organization. I needed someone to tell me that it was OK not to believe in JW's. I knew he would be able to talk to me. Because of several factors I wouldn't call him home or ask anyone for his number. I knew that one day I would see him again.

I thought of him when i found this site. I had hoped he had found it to.

Now he is dead. And all his family can say is Jehovah will give us peace. Soon all of this will be done away with. Really soon the end will be here.
I want to SCREAM!!!!!

sorry... if this doesn't make any sense. I wish I would have been able to talk with him.

Vivamus

(((((Mystery)))) I have no words, other than I'm sorry.

bittersweet

I'm so sorry

How sad that his family missed out on loving their brother because of their blind faith to a hateful religion.

Maybe sometime in the future you can reach out to his widow and see that he was able to find happiness away from the org.

(((((((((((((( mystery ))))))))))))))

WildHorses

((((((((((((((((((((Mystery))))))))))))))))) I am so sorry. I wish I had the words to comfort you but am at a loss.

sf

{{{{{{{ just holding you tight }}}}}}}

Thank you sharing this. Now it has been 'released'. That was vital.

There are some real solid support networks around for you, when you are ready. This forum is one. Yahoo chatrooms are another, as are various other sites and rooms.

You did real good. Now take a hot oil bath and have a real good cry.

We will be here when you gather yourSELF up. Take your time. It is YOUR time now.

sKally

Mystery

Thank you.

I finally did have a long hard cry and screaming fit.

SF - I did take a long hot shower. It did make me feel better.

Vitamus - thank you

Bittersweet - I was thinking about contacting his wife. I wasn't sure if i should or not.

It just hurts. Thank you. My husband is taking me out to dinner. He wants me to get out of the house, so i will talk with everyone later.

good night

sf

Bon Appetit!!

Hope you had a relaxing time out at dinner. Sleep well tonight.

sKally

nightwarrior

((((((((((((((Mystery)))))))))))))))) Thinking of you Mrs Nightwarrior

Matty

((((((Mystery))))))

I hope he read this site too, I also hope that as many Jehovah's Witnesses as possible find this site as well, and pluck up the courage to read the experiences here, then maybe something might click within them and they come out of their Watchtower induced trance.

It's tough, but all I can say to you is "forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing", think back to when you were a Witness too and the dumb things you said. In their twisted minds they honestly think that what they are doing and saying is righteous, but hopefully one day they will wake up from their stupor and feel thoroughly ashamed for the things that they have said, just as I am when I look back at some of the pious BS I used to say.

nightwarrior

WE ALL CARE. HI MYSTER The facts are that he tried to get reinstated ,back into the organization that eventusly causes so many heartbreaks and so so much hate and hostility to members ,take satisfaction in the fact that he tried to come back to you ,but the local elders had a vendetta against him ,once a peron is repentant to god , not to man then he may apply for reinstatment,but someone somewhere stopped him being reinstated,as you say he loved you and due to circumstances he had to move onto another life with someone else,you must be happy for him and the fact that he had children with someone else ,if only you were stronger in yourself when you saw him at the gathering ,but you had to follow enpty rules and false reasonings from the organization,because you wouldnot speak to him in front of others he would understand the whys and wherfores ,he knew within himself he loved you and you him ,THIS SHUNNINGAs practised by all j.ws causes so much pain and heartache to most concerned but as you now know SHUNNING is not scriptual it is a man made requirment , You know need to take stock of your life and enjoy it with your husband the past is past,move on and allow your old thoughts to remain private but dont blame your new husband for past events ,your old love would want you to be happy ,NO he is not in hell,as being free opens your mind to the love of god,i will post another time how and why shunning is wrong but many on the board have had there eyes open to freedom , shunning is just one part of freedom to receive gods love, he wasnot punished by god for his former deeds ,as some may want you to think,move on with your life and move out of the organization ,by posting more on this board as jehovah god loves us all,by the way,(IN THE LAST DAYS A PEOPLE WILL BEAR MY NAME)THEY WILL SAY BUT LORD DID WE NOT PROPHESY IN YOUR NAME, I WILL SAY TO THEM GET AWAY FROM ME YOU WORKERS OF LAWLESNESS, WHOM IS USING GODS NAME,????? ( WHOM IS SEEN AS A WORKER OF LAWLESNESS ,) WHY NONE OTHER THAN (JEHOVAHS WITNESESS)LEAVE THEM MR NIGHTWARRIOR

Dead X-JW Who Cares

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