New Here ... Just woke up (page 4)

Iown Mylife

Welcome and wish you the best. Remember to take care of yourself - some upsetting things might be said as the cult realizes you are escaping! If they can't keep you mentally controlled then they like to crush you.

Hope you keep updating here!

Marina

Sevan

Hello all!

Thank you so much for all your kind messages and support!

I had my non-JW family and my JW kids here, so I couldn't respond right away.

I am planning on reading the transcripts from the Australian Royal Commission. What I've read and heard so far is heartbreaking to say the least. If not just for the doctrinal issues, the pedophilia issue alone is enough for me to leave and never come back. The welfare of children is very important to me. I also found out that the JWs tolerate physical abuse of children, which is extremely upsetting.

I have been putting off people so far and saying I just need space, but I don't think that's going to last after today.

I lovingly and calmly told my step-daughter that I didn't want to be a Jehovah's Witness anymore and a couple of the reasons why. Her and my step-son's reaction was extremely shocking to say the least. My step-daughter, that I have raised since before she can remember, gave me the most hateful glare I have ever seen and said that she didn't feel safe being in the same house with a non-JW. Her and my step-son immediately called their mentally ill mother, who is a pathological liar and has narcissistic personality disorder with Machiavellian traits. This is a woman who has been living a complete double life for years and has been dodging the elders for the last year. Who just married a non-JW man that she's been dating for the last 2 1/2 years at least, but refused to admit to my husband that he even existed until after she was married, who had a fb under a false name to hide her second life, who secretly celebrates all the holidays, and who told the kids to lie for her when they spent time with her boyfriend. She also has slandered my husband to the extreme throughout the community and put him through hell in court. We have enough dirt on her to get her disfellowshipped 5 times over and have for years, but we haven't wanted to cause more problems in the co-parenting relationship and my husband is very non-confrontational. Yet because she still claims to be a Jehovah's Witness and the kids are unaware of the many times she's thrown them under the bus when it suited her needs, she's just a wonderful person in their eyes. So she drove over right away to pick them up now that I've apparently revealed that I'm "evil."

The kids lied to their bio-mom and told her that I yelled at them, when I didn't even slightly raise my voice, but rather very kindly explained a couple of reasons that I didn't believe in being a JW anymore. My non-JW sister is a witness to this and let the kids know that she is a witness to the fact that I never yelled at them and was actually being very calm and loving in my explanation.

I explained to my step-kids that I love them very much and that I haven't changed. They said that they didn't want me to be their mother anymore if I wasn't a JW and that they didn't want to come to this house anymore as long as I wasn't a JW. This really hurt because I have sacrificed so much for their sakes over the years and always put them far above myself and have loved them and treated them like my own children.

I have always been very honest with them, honesty is one of my core values, and yet they insisted that I was lying about the shunning policies and the only JWs will survive Armageddon teaching. I told that I could show them in the Watchtower these exact teachings, but they refused to look at the Watchtower and continually called me a liar. I told them that I am not asking them not to be JWs and that I will love them the same no matter what and respect whatever decision they make. I told them that my love for them is unconditional, no matter what they believe, and I hope they can give me the same unconditional love.

Honestly, it disturbs me that these kids have been going to the Kingdom Hall since they were born and they don't even know what their own religion actually teaches. And the hateful way they treated me for believing differently was especially disturbing. I realize now more than ever how important it is to get them out of this cult. They aren't baptized yet thank goodness, so there is still time and hope.

As for my husband, I found out after talking to him that he has mostly been mentally out for years and has just been going through the motions for me and his family for years now. So he is actually overall happy that I'm leaving, except for the issues that it will cause with his family. I just feel really sad that he wasn't able to honestly tell me his feelings until I woke up for myself. No one should be forced to live a lie. I have always supported him 100% and would have never asked him to be part of a religion he was having doubts about. My non-JW mother raised be to be respectful of other people's beliefs and culture. He is very non-confrontational, so I feel this is the main reason that he has simply gone with the flow. He also told me that he didn't want to discourage me by telling me his doubts just in case it was the truth. It is truly sad that this cultish religion prevents even husbands and wives and children and parents from being honest with each other.

Honestly, at this point I just want to get it over with and disassociate from this nonsense religion. I feel bad that I let myself get duped for the last 20 years. I am trying to self-evaluate and understand how I let myself believe and be a part of so much craziness and mind-control for so long. I realize now that I am not as much of an independent thinker as I thought I was. I care about and love my husband very much though, so I will do what I can to be respectful and understanding of his situation with his family. I will do what I can to respect his wish for me to simply fade.

I still want to believe in God and Christ though. I want to believe that all the people that have had very difficult, sad and painful lives will have a chance to be happy and loved. That God will make all things right and that there is real justice in this world. I have many questions about the Bible, especially the OT, but now is just the beginning of my journey to answer those questions.

Sevan

Thank you notalone, I will check that website out! I just bookmarked it!

mfrederick

Sevan you have a PM.

Perry

They said that they didn't want me to be their mother anymore if I wasn't a JW and that they didn't want to come to this house anymore as long as I wasn't a JW.

Jesus said a persons' enemies would be members of his own household. He wasn't joking.

I discontinued my fade and directly confronted my father and two older brothers who were elders on scriptural grounds surrounding the new covenant and salvation. I never heard from my brothers again. My father barely tolerated me while my mother was alive. They never even told me when my momma died.

From time to time, I reflect back over the past ten years since I came to belief in Christ Alone, and I sometimes compare the blessings I have received since then vs. what I had to leave behind.

After doing the math, I only regret that I had but one family of origin to be rejected by to receive "sonship" with God. Seek him first, & exclusively... he wont let you down.

Welcome to the forum!

Bonsai

Welcome Sevan! I would very much like to DA myself as well, but out of respect for my inactive wife and her relationship with her family (who are still in) I can't at this time. I guess we need to be patient for our loved ones. This religion is sick the way it pits families against each other. Sooner or later, when its broken up enough families, proclaimed enough false prophecies, shielded enough pedophiles and caused enough suicides this cult is going down and going down hard.

freemindfade

Welcome

breakfast of champions

Wow! Great intro SEVAN.

Welcome!

corruptgirl

So glad your awake. My husband and I just woke up as well. All I can say is there are alot of emotions your going to go through for the next few months, mostly anger...just know you can always vent here. I have my husband to vent to so it helps. He woke me up, I wrote a post a here on how he helped me if your interested in helping your husband wake up. Here's the

linkhttps://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/5640149346025472/how-my-husband-helped-me-see-ttatt

Good luck and enjoy life! Even if your husband remains you can be happy together just have patience. Sending you lots of love and well wishes

corruptgirl

Sorry just read your comment so I'm even more glad your husband is pretty much out too! Congratz! You can still use the info to help your kids wake up though....

New Here ... Just woke up

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