I once brought a return visit to the meetings. Noone would talk to him because they assumed it was my "wordly boyfriend" (which I didn't have). Sheesh.......good thing I guess because he never came back.
In your experience, do JW's show hospitality?
by Gopher 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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shamus
I found it poor at best....
In all the years being in a KH, I was never invited out for dinner... not that I really took the initiative anyways, and invited people over. People would not talk to me, b/c I was "new" there, and did not really seem to care who I was. I can remember many times my friends and I going to different halls and nobody would come up to us.....
The love was pretty much non-existent. I grew very tired of the "clicks" that were in the halls. I eventually joined in them, though. Then, you would get invited out....
I joined the "badass" crowd, and wouldn't want to go hang with the geeks anyways. (that being the goodie goodies!) I found them boring at best, and silly. It was fun to mess with their minds sometimes.... talk to your friends when they're around about your favorite Simpsons episodes... they would get the hint fast.
All in all, I would say that duds are a pretty unfriendly bunch. Clicky, arrogant, and silly.
Shamus
P.S. All the people in my "click" are all out of the religion now....
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A Paduan
When comparing to the general public, synophyllia requires encouragement, but xenophilla is all but absent.
By comparison to other synophillic enclosed type communities, eg. monastic or other commune, the scores remain pretty low - I may be bias but it would appear that the learned behaviours are more inclined to reward style culture.
paduan
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blondie
Gopher, here's an experience from a JW DB:
One thing my CO brought out yesterday was, we could send greeting cards to our elders, thanking them for what they do! And he said, that in Holland, when he served there, that the brothers and sisters in the congregation did the pioneers laundry, and served them lunch, EVERY DAY, at the Kingdom Hall. That was their way of encouraging these ones. He said or we could invite a family over once a month for a meal, and have hospitality. He said if we thought about things long enough we could think of things that would be good to do for others, and encourage them.
Yes, Holland is the country to be in. Vivamus, is this true?
Yes, in that particular congregation, the hospitality list on the information board would only have the slots filled in of people that already were known well or related to somebody. I talked to an elder who had only been a JW for 7 years and he said invariably no one had signed up for his family when he traveled out of town. It is the clique syndrome. In some congregations, new ones and visitors are routinely ignored by everyone, including the elders.
Blondie
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berylblue
In Jersey you're less likely to find hospitality than in the south.
I've heard that. I tried to most welcome new ones but, in reality, there really weren't very many new comers. While I did greet new ones and give little stupid gifts and cards to those women who were studying, or to new families in the congregation, I will be the first to admit that it wasn't enough (no kidding!!!); I was not in a position to have anyone over for a meal (opposing husband) and I couldn't take new persons anywhere (no money and I have never driven).
I'll be honest: Not being in the congregation "social circles", I can't say whether or not new ones were invited to socialize. I didn't see it, but that didn't mean it didn't happen.
My first time at the KH was at the Memorial, where (I realized in retrospect) there were assigned "greeters". The man who greeted me solemnly took my hand and said, "I'm so glad you are here. This is the ark; everyone out there is going to die". I was shocked and offended. I really didn't want to go back, but there was a niggling voice in my head saying, "Suppose he's right".
I still can't get that "voice" out of my head. I'm still afraid he was right.
Rosemarie
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Gadget
At the convention this weekend there was a lot of people saying hello and wanting to talk to me, even though I was on my own there, and didn't know any of the ones approaching me. I think it was more to do with the shiney motorcycle I parked near the entrance rather than any hospitality...
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heathen
Whenever I visited the local cong ( just to hear the latest new light usually) I would get people trying to hand me song books and watchtowers and usually get a welcome from someone ,elders and such .For the most part the congregation around these parts does welcome new faces .I also see alot of what gopher is talking about , at the end of the meeting people usually look for the regulars and chat away ,it gets so loud in the building I can't hear myself think .So much for the women learn in silence the apostls paul wrote about .
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Maverick
I travel a lot and would look up the nearest Hall. I found a pattern. One of the Elders wives would always come right over to me and, in a very smooth manner, grill me. I would politely explain to them I was working in the area and once I told them for whom I was working they would lighten up. Well known people in their community living in high-end homes, which I stay in. Once, one elderett told me she recognized the car I was driving, and when I told her that these people gave me the car while I was working on their home for the next six weeks, she started pointing out all the single sisters in the Hall! But in all of that I was never invited socially anywhere. Sevice yes, but never to a witness home. Some even wanted me to let them tour the homes I was working in!... NOT! How tacky, I don't do tacky! Maverick
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Gopher
Thanks all for the replies.
It seems that the JW's are generally distrustful of strangers who enter their hall. Like Dawn's return visit, they assume wrong things about people and don't go up and welcome them. (She was calling on a MAN?? Oh my Goodness!)
Or if they do welcome them, it's to give them the third-degree questioning to ensure that the person is a suitable associate.
Where is the love of strangers? If it exists, it would be in SPITE of the religion and certainly not because the religion teaches extraordinary hospitality.
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heathen
Gopher---- I would also consider the fact that the WT is aware of the apostate web sites they are probly paranoid of faces they don't see regularly or at a home bible study . One book study I showed up to they were talking about what not to talk about with people ,the UN situation was mentioned . Hey maybe they had your picture on the computer as a dangerous apostate .lol You have posted here before and as we know there are some that come only to rat people out at the congs.