Do You Feel That Your Parents "Did a Good Job" Raising You? (page 5)

Shakita

LadyLee....gosh, I don't know what to say. You must have had a very strong spirit to get through your childhood. It makes mine look like a walk in the park.

My parents were of the group that did the best they could, I guess. My Mom was an alcoholic and was afraid of her shadow most of the time. She was a great Mom when she wasn't drunk, but that wasn't a good deal of the time when I was growing up. My Mom taught me that life can not be lived to the fullest if you try to find peace of mind inside a shotglass whiskey....she died 2 years ago July 4th, and despite her not winning the "best Mom" award, I miss her. My Dad was of the generation were men did not cry or show emotion. This was his greatest fault, so I guess I can not complain. He was my Mom's enabler, making the booze in which she drowned her imaginary ghosts. He died a year and a half ago, I miss him too.

Mrs. Shakita

Lady Lee

Mrs Shakita

I guess I did because I'm still here

And we thought she was the good parent who really loved us. He was worse

jads

I feel that my mom was the best mom in the world. Yes she has been a JW for 35yrs

and she raised me and my brothers and sisters(6 of us) to be strong willed people and to speak up for what we believed in. She never has a judgemental attitude with none of her children. My brother was "disfellowshipped" a few years ago and she was the one who encouraged him to go to the elders she did not "rat" him out. And while he was disfellowshipped she still showed her love for him but still was a faithful JW. One of the things I admire about my mom is that she believes in the Watchtower but she not dogmatic about it. She has a mind of her own. You have to be like that to survive the many changes and scandals the Watchtower Society has been caught in. I am like that as well. I believe in some of the things the Watchtower teaches but other things I feel is balogna. Witnesses that try and act "superior" to other Witnesses tend to be the ones that come crashing down head first. I am "disassociated" but my mom still treats me with love and respect and I do the same to her. I don't beat her upside the head trying to get her to leave the Watchtower like so many ex-JW's do with their JW family members. In time they will see it for themselves like I did.

Litebriterstill

A round of hugs for all of you that put up with bad parenting. I was also from a very disfunctional set of parents. They were Catholic and kept having more kids. They had 10 and lost 3. I remember being called damn bratz by dear dad and my mom wished she had joined the convent instead of marrage.

They didn't do a good job and I didn't love either one. Love begets love. I looked for God all my life and look still. I was a JW since 84 and started weaning myself after 10yrs. of giving my all.

I hope my kids love me cause I wasn't a mean witness mom. I agree with one who said we should have to take a class to have kids. A potential mate should know what grade was given.

Michael3000

Yeah, except for the being raised in a cult part.

I honestly feel they were doing the best they knew how - unfortunately they thought raising their kids as Dubs was the best thing. Some parts of my personality and behavior I am thankful to them for, but I still have resentment at being raised a JW. (sigh) Things I talk to my therapist about.

-- M

Jesika

Wow, what a loaded ?

I think my parents tried as hard as they could to raise me the way they thought was right.

It has taken me a LOOOOOOOONG time to understand that. Now that I have a son of my own, I understand better how hard it is to make the right decisions and not to fully understand the impact it will have later on in their life.

The mindset of a child verses the mindset of an adult looking back on what they thought was fact growing up in their home........well.........as a parent you really can't plan that.

I was severely abused in my home, and to this day I don't and won't fully understand that, especially now that I have a child of my own.

All I know is I have to let go of the way I was raised to do a better (hopefully) job then my parents did.

minimus

"All I know is I have to let go".......These words are so true. It's hard to let some terrible things go, isn't it? But the truth is, not everyone can let things go. That's wht there's so many therapists.

Lady Lee

Min

A therapist's job is to help people understand, make sense of, learn to cope, and then to let go

Hopefully the people who need one find a good one that can help them do that

Mulan

I think they did a pretty good job. I'm a decent person, don't you think? My parents definitely had their flat sides, but so do we all!

I had a great advantage though. I had a set of wonderful, wonderful grandparents, who were very attentive to all of their grandkids, and instilled in us a very strong sense of family. They were JW's too, converting in their elderly years, but things were different being a witness when I was growing up.

I didn't miss a thing.

Princess

Yes, but I was an easy kid to raise. Don't you agree Mulan?

Seriously, they were awesome then and still are. Now they are wonderful grandparents and all their grandkids just love them.

Do You Feel That Your Parents "Did a Good Job" Raising You?

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