No longer wanting to attend meetings

breezy

Hello everyone.

First post here

Long time follower of this website, probably 4 years now. I've known about TTATT since ive been 18, im now 22 going on 23 but still go to meetings because of parents. Pretty standard for someone who is still living at home.

Going to the meetings, field service, assemblies has never been in me. I have never enjoyed these things and i finally told my parents that its just no longer in me. My mom is the one that gets the most upset, my dad i feel is just sad or disappointed. He doesn't really show his feelings much. I'm just having a hard time conveying to them that its my personal decision and that i don't want to keep lying to myself and having to go to please them. Trying to find that article in the WT about everyone making their own decision to serve god/attend meetings but couldn't find it. If anyone knows what WT im talking about, please let me know which one it is, i would greatly appreciate it.

I feel like im just rambling on, first posts are kinda awkward but basically my question to those reading this is how did you tell your parents that you were no longer interested in going to meetings/not wanting to be a JW. What scriptures did you use to defend yourself. I am an unbaptized publisher so im not really concerned about shunning although i do know that my friends would probably stop talking to me based on experience of close friends leaving the truth and being avoided

fiddler

Hello breezy, and glad you entered into this community of people that understand what you're saying. That said, I'm an older 'born in' but my story is quite different. You will, however, find plenty here that are at very similar points of life.

What I can maybe offer is the thought that this story, your life and all, is such a bigger picture than the small insullar picture you have been shown by your JW upbringing.

The so called 'world' is not an altogether evil place. It's full of compassionate people and wonderful adventures....in short, you were lied to. There is so much good 'out there'. Choose your associates wisely and with care. There are many that are good and worthy. Prove mostly to yourself these things and then let your family and old friends see you doing well. That is the best answer and defense to give to them without really saying anything. Yes, I know...the shunning sucks! It is on them.

Saintbertholdt

What scriptures did you use to defend yourself.

John 14:2 "In My Father's house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you." - New American Standard Bible

It reminds me of the corny joke where the Pope dies and goes to heaven. No that's not the joke, the story actually continues... In heaven he meets saint Peter who takes the Pope on a grand tour. Peter opens a first door to reveal a grand and solemn Catholic mass in progress. They proceed to a second door and when Peter opens the door there's a good ol revival going on, with lively music and Christians speaking in tongues. When they get to a third door Peter instructs the Pope to be vewy vewy quiet and they tiptoe past. Afterwards the Pope asks saint Peter who or what was behind the third door. Peter replies: "Oh, it's the Jehovah's Witnesses. They think they're alone up here."

clarity

Welcome .....hang around if you need support.

Simon

Congrats on getting out so early with so much of your life to enjoy and welcome to the site breezy!.

The way to get through to your parent will depend a lot on what they are like (only you will know) but you should be prepared for the possibility that getting through to them is impossible, Nothing I could tell my mother, no scriptures and no logic, would convince her to even listen to what I wanted to say. Mental shutters on full alert..

So I wish you success and hope you have great parents who will consider your position. Remember, you may end up saving them from wasting the rest of their lives and having a miserable retirement so it's worth persevering with even if you don't have immediate success - just do your best to keep the communication going.

One thing I can say for sure though - it's always better being free and living your own life and you can't let you parents choices forever dictate your life. At some point you have to chose what is right for you. We'd all love our parents to be supportive of the choices we make but the WTS often takes that from us, but they don't take our ability to make the choices.

Heartsafire

Hello there and welcome!

Good job thinking ahead to defend your stand. Hopefully your parents will respect your decision and not cut you off from the family.

Sometimes it is good to take a laid back approach (especially since you are not baptized) and simply tell them you are having some doubts and would like to take a break from "the truth" for awhile. Reassure them that you aren't planning on going crazy but that you want some time to think things through and would appreciate their respectful support of your privacy while you sort things out.

It can hurt to lose friends you've known for years. Although, if they start waking up in the future you can be there for them.

Looking forward to your posts:-) Welcome again!

freddo

Welcome breezy. I think you've done rather well to stay unbaptised at the age of 22 and have communication with other jw's. Often you will be at least thought of as weak or be avoided for reaching such a grand old age without taking the dip that leads to shunning on exit!

smiddy

Welcome breezy , enjoy your life , free from a cult influence.

smiddy

JWdaughter

Welcome. You are gonna be fine. However, if you think it is the truth, it's going to keep sucking at your life and drawing you in. If you don't think it is the truth, get out of habit of saying it(calling it "the truth") asap. That will get your folks hopeful about your return. No sense in giving loving parents false hope or a roller coaster experience. Don't over think it. Live a healthy, productive and happy life and honor the good from your parents while choosing your own path. Congratulations!

stan livedeath

hello Breezy--and welcome to the site.

i too had enough by the time i was 23. but i was married then--to a born in. had been a pioneer and a servant--gave pulbic talks both home and away.

anyway--youve got the rest of your life to look forward to--make the most if it--i did !

oh--by the way--i'm 67 now lol.

No longer wanting to attend meetings

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