Should have seen the signs...

by breal 30 Replies latest jw experiences

  • breal
    breal

    ***The 4 door car***the inability to attend the annual family picnic on Sunday ***the attitude so childish yet judgemental***

    ....funny thing is the words JW flickered in my mind on the second day I was there....and I never gave it much thought other than to wonder where the hell that came from...

    The Story: I started a new job recently. Did not hit it off with my trainer. She is a child in a womans body. She has very poor social skills and is a huge gossip....

    Well today over lunch she asks me about family stuff...getting tired of the questions I advised we were not close. Then she kept prodding so I mentioned it was mostly due to religious issues. She smiled...

    Out of nowhere it clicks.... I asked her if she was a JW.... yep she is.... regular pioneer for yrs, MS as husband, elder for father and FIL. Ugh... She initially thinks that I am the one in good standing and don't speak with my family due to them leaving. Then I tell her...no I left, and was DF'd many years ago. Silence. I give her credit as she handled it pretty well. She did not run screaming or anything.

    Instead the rest of the lunch hour was spent with her asking me things like:
    "Why don't you want to live forever?" "Wouldn't you like to not have to worry that everyone will die of cancer at age 45?" "Do you believe in creation or evolution?" "You have to realize that the people in the halls are just imperfect" ....she could not believe that things of this nature do not weigh heavily on my mind.

    Ugh...I do not feel compelled to justify my reasons for not wanting to be a part of it to anyone...Then she starts in on the whole "Things have really changed with the society" "Perhaps a hall change would have been the answer"

    The kicker....

    "You could appeal your DF'ing by stating that you were too young and not really interested in dedicating your life..." ????? She also stated that she is not to worried about an elderly family member who is 90 who got DF'd as her family believes he could have dimentia and is not responsible for his actions so how could Jehovah hold that against her..... Hmm.. I did not know this was the new view of the society?!???

    THEN - she has the nerve to start talking about kids going through a rebelious period, and then when she figures she has not hit the mark with that moves to a deep depression she experienced and then she starts talking about how she just has to put her hope in Jehovah that he will make everything ok.

    For starters I have no intention of ever going back. Which I made very clear. I told her I respect other people's decision to be part of it, that people should accept mine that it is not for me.... Then she wants info on the "status" of my family and husband etc...

    So this being my first run in with a JW since leaving it was very odd. Then I find out that there is another person in our office who is also a JW....who knows what it will be like. She even said she loves that the society is humble enought to admit when they are wrong about teachings and adjust them - but not adjust them too much to just be like "the world" ....

    I felt ill for a while afterward. I felt sorry for her. Sorry for the long post I was just amazed that I have made it this far without having any contact with JW's like this - not enjoyable. Now I can't wait to see if in the days to come her attitude and her demeanor at work change any since I am in the know as to her religion.

    Sorry for the long post....

  • Prisca
    Prisca

    I can't get over the number of personal questions she is asking. Not just about you, but the status of your husband etc???

    Good luck. It can be very awkward working in a new work place with a JW, let alone 2 JWs, lol!

  • Ravyn
    Ravyn

    something is definitely up with these persistent JWs who are talking to people they should not talk and asking such personal Qs...is it some kind of new light? Or a new pioneer tactic?

    Ravyn

  • ESTEE
    ESTEE

    ((((Breal))))) My daughter...

    "Why don't you want to live forever?" "Wouldn't you like to not have to worry that everyone will die of cancer at age 45?" "Do you believe in creation or evolution?" "You have to realize that the people in the halls are just imperfect" ....

    Sheesh!!...She's assuming you want to go back into dubdumb...with questions like that. She is full of fear, isn't she? Typical JW thinking. Jargon of the brainwashed. I'm sorry you are subjected to someone like this in your work environment.

    ((((Hugs))))

    ESTEE

  • run dont walk
    run dont walk

    very interesting .........

    if she/they continue to pressure you with questions (which is likely), you maybe should go on the offensive abit, and ask them questions ..... (UN, child abuse, billion dollar a year, constant changing doctrine, is blood okay now, ........etc)

    just a thought, when I went on the offensive with my family, they shut right up and more or less ran.

    please keep us posted as time goes on, should be very intersting.

  • Mr Magoo
    Mr Magoo

    Hi'

    I've recently concluded that even if there is a god then I wouldn't like to have eternal life - I just can't see how I should keep myself intertained. At some point you are bound to know and have tried everything.

    So actually that's my answer should any jdub ask me that question.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Take care

    Mr Magoo.

  • Gadget
    Gadget
    She also stated that she is not to worried about an elderly family member who is 90 who got DF'd as her family believes he could have dimentia and is not responsible for his actions so how could Jehovah hold that against her..... Hmm.. I did not know this was the new view of the society?!???

    If he's got dementia and not responsible for his actions why on earth did the elders put him in a jc, never mind df'ng him!!!

    A few years ago a new starter at work came up and asked if I was a jw. When I said I was he said "It'll be nice working with you brother...". I was gutted, because everyone I worked with knew all the stuff I'd done, and how I really felt about things. He couldn't hack the job and left after a few months.

    Gadget

  • Scully
    Scully

    breal

    I would feel very uncomfortable in a work environment that you described. I'm glad you stated at the outset that you have no intention of ever going back to the JWs or KH, because she will not be able to see it as a situation of her "winning you over" or one where she can try to "encourage" you. If necessary, you may need to restate your position.

    I hope this woman, and the other JW in the office, don't cause problems for you. If you don't already, I would be keeping a journal in the event that they start causing problems. Document anything that could even remotely be JW-related. IMO, all those personal questions she asked are none of her business.

    Bottom line: you are there to do your work, they are there to do their work. They cannot harass you - even minutely - over things that are a reflection of their religion or your current beliefs. If either or both of them start acting unprofessionally in this respect, you can go to your superior with your documentation. You have a constitutional right to a harassment-free workplace, whether it be harassment based on religion, sexuality, gender, disability or anything else.

    You may have to decide if it's worth it to you to continue working there. I know I'd be looking for a transfer ASAP if they started trying to "bring me back", and that might be something your immediate supervisor would not want to have happen, because intelligent competent employees are so hard to replace.

    Love, Scully

  • Shakita
    Shakita

    They're Everywhere....They're Everywhere!

    It sounds like she got some witnessing time in....

    Isn't it funny how JW's, no matter how sincere they think they are, are always so judgemental about your current status in the eyes of God....they always phrase things to sound like they are God's mouthpiece, and the main purpose is to inflict as much guilt as possible in your direction. I am surprised, too, that she asked so many questions after finding out that you are DF'd, this is a definite no-no, and she would be in for a tongue lashing by the elders if they knew.

    I would be curious to see if she continues with any religious conversation with you....post back if she does. Maybe there is some new light on speaking with DF'd ones, if not in written form(WT), maybe in the form of a letter from the society to congregations....who knows? There are an awful lot of DF'd souls running around out there to save....just think of the possibilities of increased service time and new bible studies. not to mention future profits $ .....

    Good luck at work.

    Mrs. Shakita

  • garybuss
    garybuss



    Interesting post. Thanks! I have gotten so used to people treating me nice everywhere I go, that if I run across somebody who seems to be snubbing me, I right away check to see if they are from the Witness group, since they are the only people who treat me with bad behavior. It's such an inverted reality from the way my Witness teachers taught me. It turns out the worldly people are good to me and the Witness people are the ones who are unkind to me.

    I hope the job goes good. Best wishes, GaryB

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