by closer2fine 11 Replies latest jw friends
Wasn't there an article stating that the wife of an unbeliever couldn't get in trouble with the congregation if she participated in holidays at the instruction of her husband? (ie purchasing presents that he told her to) Wasn't this because of headship rules? Where does that leave the unbelieving children? The wife is inactive & has been for years - but due to the overzealousness of a few is being watched.
closer
A lady in my old congregation would cook X-mas dinner. It was understood that as long as she did not participate (ie eat the meal) in the activities it was okay. She would go in the other room. The husband told her their kids will celebrate holidays and would not be forced to go to meetings or in FS.
As I understand it, the issue is one of "Relative subjection", ie she is subject to her husband only insofar as his wishes do not conflict with her dedication to "Serve God"
There is an an element of conscience in this . Her conscience might allow her to cook Christmas dinner , even eat it as food of today, but she would not involve herself in buying and wrapping presents, hanging up Christmas decorations or any religious service .
Fine lines may have to be drawn, but basically she could not prevent her husband from celebrating the holiday but would only go so far herself. If she wholeheartedly celebrated, I do not think that , "My husband instructed me to" would be an acceptable defence.
Complicated ? typical of the WT Pharisees..............
I do recall reading an article to that effect a couple of years ago. Somehow I suspect that at least a few JW wives have conviently used this rule to voluntarily celebrate the holidays (I mean seriously, how many husbands would actually force their wives to celebrate a holiday they knew their wife did not approve of?). Witness women are also allowed to go to the voting booths if their worldy husbands demand them do it (though technically this is "OK" for a regular JW to do in a country that demands such, they are just expected to mess up the ballot when they are in the booth alone. Afterall, we know god would smite you if you voted "nay" on Proposition 655 ).
Jeez, what a civic minded autocrat such a husband must be.
I believe that last year or the Christmastime before, a QFR was made regarding this. The bottom line was that if a husband MADE his wife decorate or accompany him to a Christmas party, it was a conscience matter.
Ok, what if a JW husband is asked by a non believing wife go celebrate? Is he allowed to or does he have go force her to go along with his belief?
The head of the house has to take the spiritual lead. If he does it, he's celebrating Babylon the Great's holiday. He could get DF'd. Oh, the irony!
Hi closer2fine
I think this is covered with the scripture about 'rendering doos"
ie
The xmas do
The birthday do
The thanksgiving do
hope this helps
Anglise
I remember when I was in the JW's, a woman in my congregation was forced to attend a bar mitzvah with her husband. She told me she thought Jehovah didn't love her and she would be disfellowshipped. She worried herself sick about it. Poor thing, I think she died some years ago. I always felt sorry for her.
I believe there was a KM article about 2-3 years that discussed this. It basically said that to keep peace, show respect for the unbeliever, that if one's conscience would allow for it, a room in the house could be designated as the "holiday room".
An elder I served with, whose wife was non-JW, "allowed" her to put a tree and decorations in the formal living room that they rarely used.
At least that's what I remember.
All best,
Mak
