New Special Assembly Day Program ( Sept.2003 ) (page 2)

SYN

Theme: Serving Jehovah With a Complete Heart, Without Any Missing Valves, Aortas Etc.( 1Chron.28:9 )

The circuit overseer will discuss "Helping Others to Serve Jehovah With a Delightful Soul, While Maximizing Profits." Interviews will highlight the joy and cold green lettuce that results from cultivating interest and conducting Bible studies with people who want to serve Jehovah and/or enter the Paedophile's Paradise.

All in attendance WILL derive comfort and encouragement from the visiting speaker's first talk,"Guarding Our Hearts in a Troubled World - New Advances in Pacemaker Technology".

In the afternoon, the part "Extending a Helping Hand - How To Make Your Fingers Grow Longer" will consider how we can assist others, whilst at the same time lining the pockets of the Watchtower Society. What can parents do to shield their children's hearts from wrong influences (like Pokemon) and help them draw close to Jehovah and sell more literature?

The part "Help Your Children Take Delight in Jehovah, Tell Them Not To Go To The Police, Ever" will provide practical suggestions and will demonstrate how this can be done and how we can avoid the Great Black-Uniformed Satan.

Final Talk."Maintain a Complete Heart in Serving Jehovah, It's Naughty To Give Bits of It Away," will focus on four essentials aspects of our spiritual maintenance program. These aspects are: 1. Selling our literature. 2. Selling our literature. 3. Selling our literature. 4. Selling our literature.

How much time and energy do we devote to earnest prayer,to studying God's Word,to zealously preaching, to bountiful bookselling, and to associating with other Christians? (Note: When we say Christians, we really mean other Witnesses. Wouldn't want you hearing things like "Jesus loves you!", now would we?) Can we improve in any of these areas? Also, can we sell more books?

BTW. The question was asked at the outset."What Can We Look Forward to Learning? We'll Tell You, In A 3 Hour Symposium, Which Is Three Talks With The Same Subject Matter, Which Is Supposed To Be Exciting."

El Kabong

The word REFRESHING is used SIX times in five pars. The word INVIGORATING three times.

OMG!!!!! Sounds just like a soap commercial. Sounds like they are trying to come across on the subliminal level on how "clean" Jehovah's organization is.

How To Make Your Fingers Grow Longer

Yeah, I have ONE finger that keeps getting longer for them.

Nathan Natas

I would have thought that with the aging generation who were supposed to dance thru Armageddon into Paradise, a more appropriate theme might be "Serving Jehovah with Stents in Our Hearts"

ozziepost

I think this was the same type of theme and program in 1966.

...and every year since then.

Same talks, just slightly different titles.

UpAndAtom

Delightful Soul

joy

derive comfort

encouragement

Take Delight

If you removed these "few words and phrases", then the entire document (of many words) would lose 99% of it's impact... and I think the author suspects this, but doesn't understand any other way to communicate.... or at the very least has little (if any) critical review by his peers. I mean, that was the problem with George Lucas' latest Star Wars movies. Boring beyond belief, stupid & unrealistic monologue that "told you the story" and never once "showed you the story". For the younger generation that are growing up with crappy movies with no story at all, they actually liked Star Wars... but the older generation sees right through it; the exposition, the wooden acting, the bad monotone dialogue, bad directing, etc.

Don't tell the readers how to feel - make them feel . This is sometimes difficult - even for a good author. A good author can bring tears to the eyes of a reader, but only a truly great author can make the reader sob like a baby (even a man). You'll never get the reader to cry by writing dribble with titles such as "The saddest story on Earth", or "Why we should cry more often", or "Thank Jehovah we have the ability to Cry"

"What Can We Look Forward to Learning?

I think the real reason the author includes this banal quasi-question/statement-of-fact, is they know they have NOT taught anything new... at least on a subconscious level, at worst a conscious one. In any case it immediately shrieks insecurity on the part of the author.

It's the same problem as before ; Don't "tell them they are learning", just teach them, then they would "know" they are learning and would be excited even if you didn't use inflationary language. It's a paradigm shift that the authors need to make, but I feel they don't know how too.

starfish422

I can't remember ever being 'comforted' or 'encouraged' by the talks at the assembly. If anything, they filled me with anxiety at the impending doom of Armageddon and of course, that nagging doubt in the back of my mind that I might not live up to Jehovah's standards enough to make it through Armageddon into the New System.

Ah, guilt. It's what makes the Dub world go round.

kgfreeperson

This one is of grave personal import to me. Just when IS this special assembly day. If it is September 13 I am going to be very upset.

obiwan

If anyone has a problem with insomnia, I suggest you attend.

Piph

ROFL @ Syn

I just pray to Jehovah that I won't be there...oh wait...

Just when IS this special assembly day. If it is September 13 I am going to be very upset.

Special Assembly Days are in the Spring, the Circuit Assemblies are in the fall.

micheal

I'm still waiting for them to change the occasion from "Special Assembly Day" to "Just shoot me in the head if I ever have to sit through another 7 hours listening to s**t while the rest of society is having fun or relaxing day"

New Special Assembly Day Program ( Sept.2003 )

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