Next time you talk to the Plumber and his buddy who like to put burdens on suicidal people, make sure you bring a recorder.
Elsewhere
That’s a great reminder. I’m going to buy one today!
Let her know that I know what it is like to sleep like that... it's the only thing that makes the hurt go away. So long as you are asleep, it is like you are dead... you don't feel. That is why suicide is so tempting... it's the sleep you don't have to worry about waking up from.
Elsewhere
While I can’t say this yet to her, I appreciate your insight. She has said similar words. Doesn’t want to go to bed at night because that means tomorrow is coming as soon as she wakes up. Doesn’t want to get out of bed because she just wants to sleep and not face the day. What’s the point, she asks. That really scared me.
they're going to be gunning for you now…. you can tell them firmly to LEAVE YOU ALONE, until after your wife's mental health has been restored
pettygrudger
That’s a good idea. If I tell them to back off until she is better mentally, hopefully that can buy us some time. Having the tape recorder there when I ask this while reminding them of their possible accountability will hopefully get them to back off.
my daughter did comit suicide after the elders threatened to df her… After my daughters death I also got the do more speech…Sabine
Sabine, I am deeply sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what it would be like to lose my wife, let alone a child that grew in my belly. I’m glad to see that you are here posting and hope that you are recovering successfully from this ordeal also.
there is a great sucide prevention organization in all major cities.Sabine
I am in contact with one and have called a few doctors that the group leader recommended. Thank you
Your wife needs support … RIGHT NOW. I know b/c I have been there… Get your wife on a message board and let her vent out all that's inside hershamus
that sounds like a good idea, but she hates computers and we don’t have an internet connection readily available to her. I use mine at work. But maybe in the future we can arrange otherwise. But getting her help is the main thing I’m focused on right now.
share scriptures with your wife such as John 6:28,29 dealing with the WORK of a Christian is BELIEVING, and loving one's neighbor, not filling out a field service report.Pray for Holy Spirit to guide you.1-800-WHY-1914NoMoreMeetings
That is a good scripture! Have been praying for guidance from Jesus to have the HS guide me. During the elder meeting while they were doing their prayer, I was doing one of my own for HS and guidance from Jesus. Since I never verbalized my anger and the elders did [what about the fruits of the spirit brothers?…], I guess I may have gotten the HS they were looking for ;P
BTW, can you explain more what the 800 number is for? Thx.
I feel your pain and fear, I have lost someone to suicide. BLISSISIGNORANCE
I am sorry for your pain and loss too. It is amazing how many here have been put through similar situations. At least for those that have had to endure similar pain can now offer guidance for those of us going through similar circumstances now. Thank you.
Repeating the mantra 'do more' to a severely depressed person is like going into a hospital to set up calisthenics, sports, sprinting etc programs for incapacitated ones. Ones w cancer, broken bones, pneumonia etc. Monty python did a skit on this once.SS
Hah! I would like to show that to my wife if I could get it on video.
Amazing, we should talk. Check your voice mail. I’m really sorry for everything that you had to endure also. But hopefully you can be of assist to me. Thx.
When I am with a person who says they are contemplating suicide, I ask them if they will willingly go into the hospital. If they say yes, I take them that minute. If they say no, I walk to the phone and call 911 that minute. Always error on the safe side. Never consider money or feelings or other's opinions. GaryB
Gary, thanks for this reminder also. Nothing should be taken for granted. When in doubt error on the safe side. Your critieria for taking them to the hospital is straight forward and makes sense. One thing I always think of is I don’t want to look back at this period if for some reason she did successfully go through with a suicide and think, “I did take her seriously. I Should have done more.” I want to do everything that I can, right now. I’ll deal with money, the embarrassment of who knows, time, etc… later on when she is well.
Why do I know this is true..........I was one of the 'cheese and cracker' men. And didn't see how BAD my cheese really smelled!!!Danny
So Danny, what awakened you to see how bad your cheese really smelled? I doubt I could say anything to change the elder’s minds, but at least I could plant the seeds of doubt for later growth!
women would be saved by faith, child bearing and sanctification and not from performing more duties in the congregationheathen
Hah! That would be good.
Monkey, thank you for your comments as well. I read your life story a while back, and it was touching. Your recounting now of how it feels like to pull out of depression gives me additional insight into something that I can not fully understand myself, but helps me see what my wife is going through and what is in store.
do go for therapy. my sibling asked for therapy the night before the suicide,... it was too latenowise
Wow, another person. That must have been tremendously trying for you. I would imagine that there must have been a million ‘What if’s?’ asked after that happened. Thank you for sharing. I plan on being involved with the therapy myself and expect that it will help me as well. There is a group in our area that specializes in her aspect of mental illness, which meets every so often. I plan on seeking that out once we get started.
Panda, thanks for the book recommendations. And the reminder that people can be on medication and go on to live normal and successful lives. It’s helpful to know this and remind ourselves of this.
To everyone else, I apologize for anyone that I did not personally mention. But please know that I have read, reread, and reread again all of your posts. Each and every one of your posts are very encouraging and a big hug to me. Thank you!
Last night before the meeting we were talking and she was in good spirits.
[I didn’t go, our book study overseer is ‘the plumber’, and I wanted to do nothing more than go a kick him the shins, and tell his wife what an idiot she is married to. I’m afraid she already knows though because she has suffered from depression in the past and made the comment to my wife that he was not compassionate at all to her or the disease.],
When she came back from the meeting she was very sad and then got upset over dinner being ‘wrong’. She said she knew it was stupid to be upset over such a little thing, but she couldn’t help how she felt inside. I’m convinced that if she didn’t go to the damn book study that she would have been ok. I gotta get her some pro help NOW and out of the borganization.
The WTS is a killer.
Thank you again!
Winston.