Status update and hello.

by Darkknight757 15 Replies latest jw experiences

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  Doubting Bro

  Darknight,

  So sorry for you and your wife's losses. It's always struck me as crazy that you have to get permission to resign a volunteer position but such is life inside the WTS.

  I think going to grief counseling is a wise move. Please keep us updated.
• 

  punkofnice

  Hello, DK. I'm so sorry for the stuff you're going through. I would imagine you would be depressed with what you've been through too.

  I don't know a way around that stuff, really. I'm the worst person to ask. What I do remember is, Churchill was quoted as saying: "If you're going through hell, keep going."
• 

  Giordano

  This organization makes you feel as though you do not have ownership over your own soul.

  This is true. It is why everyone marches in the same direction even if you are ordered to march off a cliff.

  The WTBTS is consistently reckless with the health,welfare and education of their followers and has been that way from day one.
• 

  Darkknight757

  I appreciate all the kind thoughts.

  The organization would like us to forget those that we lose and just move on. Like brandnew said, they try to dictate our grief. Everyone is different and I personally think it's unhealthy to hide those feelings. That's why I love the grief support meetings. People of all backgrounds who come together to support each other. Many will tell us our babies are in heaven but I just don't find that comforting, but I also don't see a problem believing that if it helps a person to heal. That's a personal matter.

  Mrquik, you mentioned prayer. I haven't gotten to that yet on a personal level because I don't know what to say. Honestly I don't know how to pray to God at this point considering the witnesses do it all wrong. Using the name "Jehovah" isn't proper according to my current understanding. But I really have no interest at this time trying to build a relationship with someone who I am unsure exists.

  Daniel, sorry for your loss. I think it's hard for people to really understand pregnancy loss and stillbirth unless you experience it. People look at the wife and I like there is something mentally wrong with us. They often ask why we haven't gotten over it yet. 😕 I don't think it is something you just "get over."
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  tornapart

  So sorry for your loss Darknight. I've been through that myself too, many years ago and you're right, it's not something you ever 'get over'. The pain of losing a child is unlike any other kind of pain and the grieving process takes a long time. I suffered with depression two years later and was told it was 'delayed' grief as I'd seemed to cope quite well at the time, went on and had another child and then 'Bam!' it hit me like a brick. Other people can't fully understand unless they've been through it. Especially as they may never have even seen your child as a baby. I really hope you and your wife find some way of coping with your grief. My heart truly goes out to you both.
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  DesirousOfChange

  I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through with the loss of two children. Parents are NEVER supposed to bury their children. I simply cannot find the words to express my sympathy for you.

  I often suffer bouts of depression and I think that the only thing that "keeps me going" are my children and the goals that I want to help them attain before I leave the scene. I awakened to TTATT at an age much too late in life to turn "my ship" around and work toward the kind of goals and accomplishments that I could have and should have and would have had if only the majority of my life had not been snatched away by chasing false promises/prophecies.

  I hope you and your wife find peace.

  Doc