There is a couple that totally opened my mind on this. They got out mentally together. Took some time, but they were on the same page. Their teenage children they worked on, and finally the entire family is on the same page.
They simply told the elders...."guys we have decided not to attend meetings anymore for matters of conscience. We are not disassociating ourselves, nor will we be discussing the reasons why we have made this decision. Thanks for respecting our privacy."
Inevitably......people and especially elders NEED to know WHY. But they just stay on that message. End of story. No extra language. "We simply decided to no longer attend, and don't wish to discuss why. We know where you are at if we need you."
It was absolutely brilliant in its simplicity. The elders could literally do nothing at all. The "gotcha" phrases like "so you don't want to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses anymore"? or "Do you still believe Jehovah is using the FD&S?"........can be ignored. You simply would reply...."I didn't say that", and then just repeat, "We simply decided to no longer attend, and don't wish to discuss why. We know where you are at if we need you."
It works.