I was giving a little talk at 10 years old from the Song of Solomon. Every time I practiced it I would hysterically laugh. One part said something like ' We have a little sister that has no breast, what shall we do for her when she is spoken for' aaand ' There is a wall and her breast are like towers' two verses later. Just about to hit puberty so talking about breast was funny to me. I called my elders son friend and told him I was nervous because I couldn't stop laughing. He then told his two other brothers. During the talk I made the mistake of looking up at my three elders friends sons, all three in a row.... I burst into laughter, uncontrollable laughter. I had to literally grab the podium from not falling down. I laughed until near time was up and so did bothers 1,2,3 just stepped off the stage and went outside.
Funny occurrences
by Freedom rocks 22 Replies latest social entertainment
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StephaneLaliberte
A brother wanted to have an audio tap play where he did an audio drama. The brother at the sound played Side B rather then Side A. The song "Let's get physical" started to play. Everyone laughed for years.
A brother doing a talk on family including discipline of the children. Right in the middle of his talk, his 5 year old girl ran off to the front and than the back while the mother was running behind, trying to catch her. Everyone laughed for years.
A brother, trying to get across his first talk (was about 12 years old), stuttered across his first sentence and then started to cry. No one ever laughed at it.
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Reopened Mind
An elder was giving a question and answer part on the Service Meeting. When he asked a question no one raised their hand. He went on to the next two or three questions and still no one answered. His frustration with the audience mounted, he put down the Kingdom Ministry and proceeded to lecture us on studying the lesson. Then one brother raised his hand to tell him he was covering the wrong part.
Reopened Mind
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Pete Zahut
My mom played the piano at the Hall so we had to be there on time. We were running late one Thursday evening and had to get ready quickly and dash out the door. In her haste, Mom forgot to put her dress on and put her coat on right over her slip. We got to the Hall just as the meeting was starting and she went directly to the front where the piano was and took off her coat. It was then that she realized that she had no dress on. (Comedy ensued and we never let her live that one down)
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Virgochik
I was besties with another elder's daughter. She was pre-teen and hadn't yet become tall and willowy. In other words, she was chubby. At home they called her Shelly-Belly. So she puts up her hand to comment and her father said, " Yes, let's hear from Little Sister Shelly-Belly! Oops.
We had a guest speaker one Sunday. I was sooo bored and had time on my hands. I sneaked up on the stage and placed several sharp thumb tacks on the guest speaker's chair. When he sat down, he yelped and jumped back up. My dad knew immediately it was me. I had to sit in the back and pretend to be disfellowshipped for about a month.
We had a few sisters trip and fall on the little steps going up on stage. Very funny though, when the high heel flies off and she's hopping on one shoe and one stocking foot trying to grab it.
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GrreatTeacher
One hot summer Sunday before air conditioning the double doors were thrown open for air circulation. A black and white alley cat walked in the door, sauntered up the right side aisle, walked across the front then back down the left side aisle before walking right back out the door. Amazingly, no one did anything. Air conditioning was put in soon thereafter.
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Solzhenitsyn
Brother brought his tackle box on stage once in a N GA cong. Starting taking this one and that one out explaining the subtle differences and the type of fish each will catch or wont catch.
Ultimately went something like....
Satan is the master at using custom lures to catch individuals based on their personal weaknesses. So he is most effective in using this bait or that bait. No one can claim to be the masterbaiter but Satan and his demons.
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jookbeard
back in the early 1990's there was a service meeting item when an elder interviewed a kid who attended a local school he was about 11 at the time , the brother was telling the audience about the breakdown in discipline in schools the drugs problems etc so he goes " so Christoper tell me about the drugs problems in your school that you have have to deal with"
Christopher responds " yes drugs are a problem in our school a lot of the pupils have taken to smoking herbs!"
the hall just erupted.
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freddo
In the early 1980's as the HLC malarkey started to be rolled out in the UK we would get members of the HLC committee giving talks to congregations by invite from time to time. (As if 3 meetings a week wasn't enough?)
So this "circuit heavy", HLC chairman comes to give a talk with one of his younger sidekicks - doing 30 minutes each.
The younger guy gets up and talks about "working with doctors" and "what a great relationship we're building with the big teaching hospitals, yada yada yada ..."
He talks about the - then - new things jw's are helping the medical community with (I know, I know) - blood salvage, not being concerned when the blood count goes lower than recommended etc. and then he starts on about "magic trousers" (which I've not heard of before or since) which were some sort of warmth/compression type garment that would "help" in cases of blood loss.
He goes on at some length about these magic trousers and then hands over to the older HLC chairman for his part.
The old boy walks up to the podium but slips on the shiny wooden steps and his legs flail out at almost 90 degrees like a cartoon character slipping on a banana skin. It seemed go on for several seconds but was probably no more than a second or two before the old boy just manages to stay upright with help from his mate who had just passed him while coming off the platform.
I'm in the front row and the brother next to me (who went inactive about ten years ago - yay!) puts his hand to his mouth, keeps a dead pan face and whispers in my ear ...
"Was he wearing the magic trousers!?"
Much rocking of shoulders and suppressing of silly giggles by me.
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Still Totally ADD
I was 14 at the time running the sound at the back of the hall during the service meeting. My dad whose name is Archie was giving a talk when this stranger' walks in and sets in the back row. You can tell he was drunk but was quiet. In the middle of my dad's talk the stranger stands up and shouts out "Give them hell Archie" and walks out. It was one of my dads old drinking buddy's. Everyone found it to be very funny. Still Totally ADD