Hi everybody,
I'm writting this post to comunicate you all that I finally DA myself. Now it is a hard time for me. The announcement was made this last friday, and I have known that there was a lot of people crying after that meeting. I feel VERY sorry for them, I find it so unfair, me suffering the lost of my friends, and they also suffering for me..... I'm also very afraid of the "world", I'm a shy person. My personal experience with my congregation is positive. It seems that they are specially open-minded. This has something to do with the elders spirit of my ex-cong. For example, I was alowed to bear a beard (a goatee), and at the same time serve as a attendant in the main hall of the Circuit Assembly, I also was alowed to do taichi, I personally know the elders (some of then are/was my friends) and they are of the sincere/no pharisee like/ type. Before, they make the announcement, I was visited by two elders, one of them was about to cry. (He is a sincere man, I feel sorry for him, he has been depressed for 20 years, and his wife has cancer) I think this congregation spirit is far better than the Organization as a whole. (or much better than the spirit that the Org promulgates)
This made my decision harder to make. But I can't endure it anymore, I don't belive it, JW aren't better that anyone, I've seen the hipocresy, the inconsistencies, and the lies, and the absurdities. I can believe in this religion anymore, I've been doing research for several years, I've overcome a lot of fears (fear of armagedon, fear of being wrong, fear of demons, etc...), I've also losed something (a glorious vision of future, a whole world view, a lot of friends, a God, etc...) I also gained my freedom. I'm free to think, I'm free to explore ideas, that makes happy, my familty ,even though they are JW, support me, they won't shun me, even my sister in law respect my decision and treat me with dignity. I think that I'm lucky.
I will post my personal history soon. (Evidently, english isn's my mother language, and it is not easy to me to write in english,)
_Heianderen_