If you observe male/female interaction at, say, a bar, you'll see tons of guys looking at women and talking about them, but few go up and talk to them.
Ummmm...those guys are the married ones....?
ESTEE
Who here has a way with women?
by obiwan 82 Replies latest jw friends
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ESTEE
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ESTEE
Valis????
'scuse my blond streak....Do you mean Missionary
positionwork?ESTEE
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ESTEE
I also agree with the whole confidence thing. Everything that I've been talking about (on this subject) is all elements in confidence. He makes the first move, he asks girl out, he's not afraid to touch, he's comfortable in his own skin, he can talk to you with ease, he knows exactly what he's doing, and he doesn't care if you turn him down or not.
Nos....you are wise....very wise...Indecisive men are a turnoff...detectable by women immediately...
I had a guy ask me out this week. (Hmmm...two guys in one weeek......!!!) He declared he wanted to date me....then he proceeded to say, "Call me and tell me when you wanna go...somewhere..."
Ummm....do you think he will wait a long time for the call...?
ESTEE
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Pepper
For me it all depends on the setting, if i am in a bar or night club then the women seem to come crawling to me. I sing in night clubs women are always goo goo eyed over singers even if he is off key. Last night I sang at this dive and this gal asked me to come set with her femal friends so I did she was all over me the only way out was to go take a piss. And of course the smell factor has a lot to do with it, I use my old stand by "Brut". I am not a handsome man but between my Brut and my puggie ass women can't seem to keep their hands off me. Oh also I just love it when I am around women on my birthday, because most all women will show their boobs if they can find a reason to. Case in point last year I had five women who gave me a good send off on my birthday, four flopped their boobs at me one went so far as to dip her tit into my beer then into my mouth and one did a lap dance on me. So I got a pitcher of beer for them, bless their hearts. (It was all in good taste.) Pepper
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William Penwell
I have no problems talking to woman because I treat them as human beings not objects. As far as getting to first base however, thats a different story. But as in the thread I started we were saying how you cannot look like you are pampering for her attentions because right away you have started out on the wrong foot. If a lady detects that you are dead. However, I have just learned over the years not to put on airs in front of them. I haven't got time to waste on some ignorant woman that wants to just play head games, thank you very much. My motto is, this is me if you don't like what you see you can kiss my butt.
Will
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SpannerintheWorks
I have. It's not a problem to overcome, or solve. Women and men are human beings and we should treat each other
the same. I do. I kind of build up a conversation, injecting a bit of humour every now and then, and we get along.
I don't really see that there is a problem anyway, making friends with women, or, if you are single, chatting them
up and making them believe you are the world's greatest stud and multiple orgasms are guaranteed should
she sleep with you.
Spanner
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Skeptic
Eric, WOW! Very good way of putting it! I never saw it that way before. Thanks for explaining that.
teejay, thanks for your insights.
They can be pretty cool and awfully fun to be around, too. Just treat 'em like people and you'll quickly find out which they are.
I agree. I enjoy women's company much more than men's. This is due to a quirk of my childhood that made me able to talk to women easily. I have trouble talking to men, mainly because a good percentage feel they have to show me up somehow. I don't play those games.
And you're right: ""Few men do."...Women love it when they have the chance to be around a man who doesn't have those kinds of issues. Believe me.
I do believe you. I find that many men find women a mystery, and spend their time plotting how to get them or how to talk to them. Few men view women as their equals, and even fewer value a woman's intelligence. For me, an intelligent woman is very attractive; a dull-witted one does not hold my interest for long. Since many men are intimidated by an intelligent woman, this gives me a huge advantage over them.
One of the most fun places I could ever be is a room full of women....In that situation, most of the men I know would freeze up like a deer caught in the headlights and find a ballgame on TV as quick as they could. Me? I really hafta watch myself 'cause in a setting like that I'm like a little kid in a candy factory. -hee hee-
This is getting spooky. I tend to gravitate towards the kitchen in any gathering, as I love to be in a room full of women. For some reason, I enjoy women's conversations much more than men's. Most men look at me like I am strange to be in the kitchen with the ladies, but the women seem to enjoy it. As a bonus, I get to snitch some food!There's lots of ways to get women going, but in case you don't know one, here's a tip: get 'em to talk about men. (That was a free tip. You'll have to pay for the rest.) If you're just a little bit clever, you can have a lot of fun with what comes out of that.
That sounds like fun! I will have to try that. Uh, what is your fee structure?
wednesday,
a guy who will spend time talking to me . that is a real turn on. It is like foreplay for a woman.
I agree. For some reason, most men are not interested in really talking to a woman. The book Emotional Intelligence explains why.
I love talking, just talking for hours. And cuddling for hours. For some reason, this is very rare, or so I am told.
Estee,
Ummmm...those guys are the married ones....?
LOL! Probably...or else the previously married ones.
Indecisive men are a turnoff...detectable by women immediately...
I love getting a woman's insights. Estee, I never knew that before.....that explains so much about my romantic history.
Pepper, women love a singer. Being a singer is a major babe magnet.
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seven006
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If women are so intuitive and they see this as a turn off why do they consider some guys who know what they want and go after it, pushy, or too serious, or a bit over bearing? Also, if they are attracted to a guy who seems to be in control of things in his life, why do they scream years later about being with a guy who was so damn controlling over their own life? A guy just can't seem to win from situation to situation and woman to woman. Just like women, in some ways guys are all the same and we cannot always expect similar reactions from our own actions. It is the difference in men and women that cause the confusion and we are only similar in certain aspects and the same in others.
As dr. Grey says in his book Men are from Mars women are from Wherever, guys should speak in a soft voice and be understanding at all times. But, if we do that we are considered wimps and indecisive. Personally I think there are way too many wimpy ass psychologist writing too many wimpy ass self realization books. As Freud said "I have studied human nature my whole life and the one thing I could not find the answer to is 'what do women want"?
I think this all depends on the individual woman and individual man. They are not all the same and the same rules and or techniques that work for one doesn't' necessarily work for another, with another. I think if a man or a woman are interested in being more than just friends, all the first impression stuff eventually goes out the door as the friendship or relationship progresses. Most of those factors are derived from each persons previous experiences with the opposite sex and we all have to deal with each others experiences as well as changing situations in each others life.
As far as indecisive goes, I have found that to be a characteristic of women as much or more than men. Certain aspects of your first attraction during the growth of a relationship change during the process. If a guy knows what he wants from the beginning, that may scare some women. That is dependent on what that "want" is. It would be nice to be completely honest and up front from first eye contact but I have never seen that happen nor is that first attraction solid enough to carry though to any thing more than a first sight attraction. The eventual introduction of things both unexpected and unwanted during the dating process can change everything.
Women can't completely figure out men any more than men can figure out women because we are all different and we have all had different experiences with the opposite sex as well as different needs and wants. That doesn't even include the ever changing circumstances in each ones life that crop up. The only constant I have ever experienced in the whole men woman experience is inconsistency itself. First impressions or as this thread seems to allude to "the initial meeting" is just a small part of the whole experience. I have met dozens of women who at first glance I am attracted to but after some time the inner person shows up and I'm running for the hills. I have also met women who at first glance there is no major attraction but after a while, I get to know them and the big picture develops and the attraction becomes more apparent. If we all could just depend on physical attraction or that first initial attraction to carry us through a relationship what the hell would we need our brains or our inner feelings for?
If a guy says, "Let me know what you want" or "let me know where or when you want to get togther," is that being indecisive or is that caring more what the woman wants and considering her feelings more than his own? From what I have heard and experienced, that is a major complaint by women. If that attracts you from the beginning and you end up with a controlling self indulged guy in the end, than that apparent decisiveness may be attractive at first, but then you may ask yourself, what did I ever see in this control freak in the first place? Was it possibly his decisiveness was hidden as a controlling nature? Does he know what he wants from a woman in the first place but ends up being a pea brained egotistical walking hard-on?
As I said, it all depends on a lot of things and those things aren't necessarily automatically apparent from the beginning nor are they consistent. First impressions tend to stay that, first impression and don't have any lasting continuance down the road.
As they say, watch what you ask for, you just may end up getting it.
Dave
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Bendrr
Who here has a way with women? Not I, says I.
I'm the original maximum-strength "Girl-B-Gone".
Mike.