For me my wake up was gradual and it centered on the annual meeting a few years back and the Bible being revised. I was raised in the truth and if the Bible could be changed than everything else could be changed too and that didn't sit well with me. I decided a few months ago that this is not the truth but my fade has to be gradual. At first I felt like my foundation had crumbled and I had no belief system and felt loss but I'm actually enjoying the journey now cause it feels like I have a blank canvas and I can create whatever I want so that's exciting. I'm worried about getting caught and losing my family but I try not to dwell on that. I'm enjoying doing things like dating and being a woman. I feel like I'm finally living although I can't share it with others. And lastly finding this website and thus support system has been incredible. To find other brave ones with similar stories who have triumphed is reassuring.
How have you felt since you learned TTATT?
by tornapart 38 Replies latest jw experiences
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onightdivine
I felt that my doubts were finally validated.
But there is still a lingering cloud of fear of breaking away completely from the "friendships" I've formed. I invested too much, gave a lot... and while it can be explained as the effect of "sunk cost fallacy", I'm taking it slowly and still giving my shot at relating to my very few closest "friends" at a personal non-spiritual level.
I don't know how else to go but I promised myself I won't be as gullible as before.
Regarding the TTATT, it is freedom. Not going to die while blindly following those heartless corrupt Governing Body members. Everyone else, wake up and stop judging the "weak ones"!!!!!
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Heartsafire
My husband knows I don't believe the crap the Borg is peddling anymore. He shuts himself off by telling me that he doesn't want to know and that he doesn't care if the Borg is lying. (We've had a few "clear the air" conversations in the past couple weeks). So, the general feeling around my house is tension and deliberateness. But, I am still SO happy I know ttatt. It feels so good to shake off the guilt and fear spewing from their redundant lies and propaganda. Even though I feel stressed, I push the fear of family rejecting me out of my mind. Sure, when I finally complete my fade, perhaps they will shun me. But, maybe they won't. Or, maybe one person won't. I don't know what's going on in peoples' heads, so I'm not going to worry about that today. Basically, I try to avoid worrying about the future, and I indulge in comedy. A lot of comedy. Watching my favorite comedians and reading my favorite comic books keep my heart light. And, of course reading this forum:-)
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Heartsafire
And Congrats to you, Howie, by the way! 👍 -
tornapart
Thanks everyone for your experiences, it's great having a board like this, makes you feel less alone in having to deal with the fallout.
Howie.. what beautiful children you have!
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punkofnice
It's been a rollercoaster ride. I often want to....er........get revenge on the governing body...say no more. -
flipper
PUNKOFNICE- I'm right there with you brother about the governing body. I'd do a covert operation with you any day of the week to take this organization down if you could find the financing. Seriously -
punkofnice
flipster - Yup. No kidding. If I had the money I'd recruit you. We could write protest songs together for a start! -
James Mixon
The same feeling I felt when I came home from Viet Nam.
After my experience in Nam I felt there was nothing I couldn't accomplish
in life. The same feeling after learning TTATT. New doors were opened, it
was up to me, no silly restrictions.
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flipper
PUNK- Amen to that my friend. I'd even go undercover and find that damned pedophile database too ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper