What JWD means to me...some reflections, and your opinions

by onacruse 24 Replies latest jw friends

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  hillary_step

  Stacy,

  I think there are too many personal attacks here and I certainly got nailed a few times by people with opposing political views.

  I am sure that politics and religion tend to enflame opinons more than bicycles.... It comes with the territory. Avoiding threads that are likely to be fraught with strong opinion can often make for a happier on-line life. Unlike Craig..., I do not take the Board that seriously but I have never been a team player and actually don't care terribly if people disagree or 'shout' at me. I have very strong opinions on some matters and expect that they will be challenged. If I do not want them challenged I just do not express them.

  I have seen the owner of the board (who I like) post some very negative messages directed towards users here. My opinion of that is yes, it's his house and we should behave, but he has invited us in here and he isn't always as good a host as he should be. He also has responsibility.

  In all fairness to Simon his 'take it or leave' it stance has been one that has evolved over the Board's life. He tried many other 'softer' methods and he and his family suffered the trauma of some very ugly things happening to them over the past couple of years because of that. He is a better man than I as I would have disbanded the Board immediately, especially when some persons accused him having a sexual preference for under-age girls. In many ways Simon's decisions are not just his, they are forced on him by 'we', the Boards users.

  I personally have very little interest for the Boards 'social' side, and admit to a frustration over the many threads that discuss and deal with life -shaking subjects such as 'what flavor of chewing gum do your favorite movie stars chew', but then it takes all sorts.

  As to the Boards survival, well as long as the WTS is with us, such Boards as this will be also. Every so often I leave the Board and begin to drift from XJW issues, which have little affect on my life these days. Then I might receive a note of another suicide due to disfellowshipping, or hear of some other outrage that has taken place within the JW's and I find myself coming back. I suspect this happens to quite a few of us.

  Best regards - HS
• 

  frenchbabyface

  Nothing to add
• 

  xenawarrior

  I came to this board to learn more about a religion that was controlling someone I was very close to. I needed to understand just what he was involved in and why it caused him to struggle the way he did.

  I was amazed at what I was reading and the depth of the control the WTS has over it's followers and the abusive techniques it uses in that control. I remember my JW friend telling me about having been disfellowshipped and the shunning and how much it hurts. This was before I knew anything about the JW religion. He was very careful about saying anything to me about it at that time- probably because he knew me so well and knew I'd have a real hard time with it all. He told me that shunning was a form of discipline. I was livid. I told him back then- that IS NOT discipline- it's ABUSE. I also told him that no god I would ever believe in would condone the shunning of others for any reason.

  Well, that was before I even knew anything about the JW faith. Coming here and reading the stories of how shunning and other abusive methods methods used by the WTS hurt so many people so deeply and has torn apart so many families broke my heart. It's been great reading stories from some folks overcoming that and finding a life outside of all of that and healing from those wounds and seeing everyone (for the most part) supporting one another on their healing journey. Once I learned- my friend's behavior and his beliefs and his affectation made sense.

  I stuck around because I met some great people and formed some friendships with some which will last a lifetime and we've enjoyed getting together to celebrate and share that friendship. I thought that from time to time that my perspective, not having been a JDUB might be helpful. Whether that has been the case or not- I'm not quite sure.

  One thing I really have gained is knowledge about religion in general. There are so many well researched pieces writtten by some of these folks regarding religion in general that I have read and it has really shook my own belief system. I believe differently about religion than when I arrived here; based on that info. To those who have taken the time and effort to do the research and write it all out- THANK YOU.

  XW
• 

  pettygrudger

  I had been out of the JW's for 18 years when I first came to this board 2 years ago. Up until that point, I didn't think there was anyone like me. For all this time I lived with issues of being an outcast, and someone that didn't really fit in society, nor in the JW's. I had love on the outside, and lots of friends, but very few could understand on some levels where I was coming from. I found this place, and on several levels it has been a liberating experience, and it has helped me grow in my understanding of people in general. I'm much more confident than I used to be, and I've learned that its okay to be me, just the way I am. I've learned that even in the world of ex-jw's, there will NEVER be a Paradise type borg existence, that people are just people, that its okay not to "jive" with everyone, and more importantly, that I don't have to like or please everyone I come in contact with so as not to feel that sense of rejection that Valis mentioned.

  I found that I "don't fit in", and have come to embrace the fact that it's okay - I was never supposed to "fit into anything". My world's supposed to be made to fit me (if that makes sense).
• 

  High Castle

  I hope that this board - or a descendent - continues as long as it is needed. That said, I am waiting for the demise of the ultimate cause of this boards existence. I do not wish to cause offence in my waiting for the demise of the Society. Everyone should be welcome on this board - current practitioners included.I do not wish for for a goverment crackdown on the Society- that is the last thing I would wish. Among other reasons, most on this board are aware that such an act could only strengthen the Society. No I wish it would fade away in irrelevance, like the cranky 19th century fundamentalist sect it is. I am waiting to see a notice in the back of the paper announce the auctioning off the Society's assets in a bankruptcy sale. Come to think of it, I am waiting to see Witness memrobilia on E-Bay. Hold on to those 'blood cards', they may become collectors items someday.