My husband and I got married 11 1/2 years ago when we were witnesses. I feel what we have is special and am glad I haven't slept with any one else. We have grown up together ( we got married when we were just 22) . Although I do know many who haven't been as lucky. I do feel that we weren't given enough trust and freedom and maybe we should have seen a bit of the world before settling down but having said that we are extremely happy but both feel we should have enjoyed our twenties alot more by going out and having fun instead of going out on the service and attending meetings!!We are now doing that with our daughter and are really happy together. Sidney
JW marriages: happy/unhappy
by starfish422 21 Replies latest jw experiences
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Odrade
JT-- some great stuff here. I agree that the very things the JWs value are the things that put strain on the marriage. My husband and I have a very good marriage, IN SPITE of having started it out as good little Dubbies. We bent/broke alot of the rules, pursued a decent living, and vacations/comfort. But the fact remained that many our (albeit infrequent) disagreements were about the roles we were "supposed" to be playing as witnesses.
"You need to take the lead." "You need to take me to meetings." "You need to study more with me." Yep, that was me all the time harranguing him about being a better Witness, although deep down, the things I valued about him were the very non-JW traits--his value for education, logical thought, wanting to spend time with ME, not a watchtower...
He also put pressure on the relationship over JW issues... being very unhappy with the guilt of knowing he was just going through the motions to keep me and family happier.
We are still under pressure even though we are out, due to family issues. But we have a much better relationship now that we are living in the real world. So weighing in on the question... I would vote: unhappier, because of the unrealistic pressures that are fused with the normal issues of being married.
Odrade