Introducing Myself... (page 5)

joannadandy

Like everyone else I have to say--wow, what a great story Kyria!

I'm so glad you found this place. Thanks so much for sharing your story with us!

Shutterbug

Even when I tell people about my past, it's just "telling". There has been no one in my life to say "Wow, I remember that."

There is no way someone who has not been subjected to the controlling mindset you have described can understand what you are trying to get across to them, as this is totally foreign to most people. It took me twenty years to understand that little fact and finally went to a get together of ex witnesses and suddenly the light shone brightly. Us exes do not always think alike and some you will surely disagree with, but that comes with the freedom you have to be your own person and not subjected to the whims of some old men in New York.

Welcome, and many thanks for a great post. Bug

xenawarrior

There is no way someone who has not been subjected to the controlling mindset you have described can understand what you are trying to get across to them, as this is totally foreign to most people.

Bug- please stop saying this !!! Better yet, please stop believing it !! Although it may be foreign to them; they can and will understand, if they want to. AND, if you give them the chance. Perpetuating this belief only serves to keep the separation going. We can understand and although that understanding cannot possibly mirror that of someone who has been through it, I don't believe it's truly necessary in order to be empathetic or supportive or helpful to those who have.

Those "glazed eyes" you may see along the way when sharing your stories with those who have never been "in" may not be coming from a lack of understanding- it might just be the result of shock and you may move on to the next person without ever finding out that they did understand- they may just have been feeling really badly for all you went through at that moment.

Some won't understand because they just aren't interested in understanding. But those folks probably also won't be understanding of the plight of anyone else who has been through hell in their life in another manner.

and yeah, I still love ya Bug !!

XW

berylblue

Welcome, Sweetie!

LeslieV

Welcome Kyria!!!!!! Very interesting story thanks for sharing your life with us!!! Keep up your writing there is alot of healing that takes place when you write down what you survived!!!! Can't wait to hear how your life is going to progress forward!!1

Leslie

Shutterbug

Ok XW, As soon as I sent that post I thought of you. Obviously you do understand, better than anyone because you work very hard at understanding us. However, I really don't think the average Joe down on the corner really has a clue as to what some of us have experienced. Everytime I've tried to explain it I got that "glazed look" you described in your post, or they started telling me about the greatness of their church.

Now I will reword what was written above

There are very few people who have not been subjected to the controlling mindset you have described, who can understand what you are trying to get across to them, as this is totally foreign to most people. I sincerely believe this to be true. Of course XW, you are right, everyone does not fit in the same catagory, so blanket statements will get you in trouble everytime.

Kyria, obviously we do not always agree here, but then we aren't compelled to do so as this isn't the Kingdom Hall. If you should have a chance to meet Xenawarrior, don't miss the opportunity, you will make a good friend.

Bug

Valis

Yeah Kyria...just stay away from shutterbug...he's real trouble... I also wanted to add that it is also in the delivery sometimes that people don't understand. That thing that is common place to us gets discussed so regularly, but as it is foriegn many times I don't think people understand what we are trying to convey when we talk about our experiences. This has a lot to do, IMO, with the level of real social maturation or lack thereof we have been exposed to. Also, even for all the public witnessing we have ever done, I think sometimes spontaneous combustion might be a better way to express our anecdotes to people "not of this fold"...*LOL* Have a good day everyone.

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

Shutterbug

Yeah Kyria...just stay away from shutterbug...he's real trouble...

This coming from a man who has earrings in his nipples ?? Seriously, neither one of us is dangerous, just a little odd. Bug

kyria

Ha! Thanks guys.

I have met non-JW's who are very empathic, and some of them have been able to point out aspects of my life that I never noticed - for example, it was a non-JW that first pointed out to me that I was a strong person!

Of course, it is a different kind of connection than with someone who understands because they were there and they experienced it. Although my friends are fascinated with the stories I have, I have been missing someone who can come back with stories of their own.

It's also hard to tell people stories because, like XW said, they tend to feel badly for what I went through. So there is always that aspect of watching what you say so as not to appear like you're looking for a pity party.

I am enjoying getting my memory jogged with other people's stories. I realize already that there are quite a few things that I've blocked out.

So, am I to understand then that XW has no affiliation with the Witnesses? Are you just interested in the mindset, or did you know someone who was one?

- Kyria

little witch

Welcome to the board!!!

I applaud you for sharing your story, I know how emotionally draining it is. It seems one must "go back" and relive those bad times.

For you to be able to do this shows your compation, empathy, and braveness, and I just know you will get along famously here because of it.

Hope to know you better dear, and again, welcome!!

Introducing Myself...

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