Death anxiety......ever happen to you?

shotgun

The other night I'm in bed trying to fall asleep with my tornado of thoughts swirling this way and that and for no apparent reason I started to have an anxiety attack thinking about death.

It was easy to accept so many things about death when you believed it's never going to happen or that if it does I'll be back..Just like Arnold.

When I speak to non-dubs they don't seem to experience it as much because death has always been an accepted part of life to them.

I can't go back to thinking like a dub and I admit I'm a non-bible believer now and not even sure about the existence of God..at least not the biblical one.

So I guess I can only look forward to a long healthy life and hope that the last thing I see before I die is the face of my daughter holding her grandchild.

Have many of you had this anxiety attack after leaving the borg?

DanTheMan

I never gave my own mortality a second thought during my years as a Watchtower Marketing Representative.

Where once I felt invulnerable, now I see only difficulty and uncertainty ahead in my life. I may die tomorrow, I may live to be a ripe old age. I feel that I have much to atone for, so I hope I have at least a few years remaining.

I tend to experience the "tornado of thoughts" you speak of especially after a scary news story. I hate that because I want to stay abreast of current events but damn a lot of what is going on in the world scares the hell out of me. I am a citizen of a despised nation that millions in the world would like to see blown to bits, and thousands are working towards that end. I got a double whammy in September of 2001 - the 9/11 attacks, and my first real solid doubts about Watchtower Inc. It has been a rollercoaster since then.

There's a book I want to read called The Denial of Death. It won a Pulitzer prize back in 1974, judging from the Amazon reader reviews the book is both devastating and enlightening.

Phantom Stranger

Not to be a smartass, but no, I haven't had this experience. I was far more terrified of f*cking up and letting my family down when I was in the WTS than I have ever been since.

GentlyFeral

There's a book I want to read called The Denial of Death.

Dan, thanks for the tip. My local public library has it.

GentlyFeral

plmkrzy

Hell I don't need to leave the borg to have an anxiety attack. Crap I'm having one right now!!

SanFranciscoJim

It was death anxiety which brought me into the JWs in the first place. I was proselytized in 1974....one year before Armageddon was supposed to occur. I so feared the imminence of the Great Tribulation that I was baptized as a JW in short order and almost immediately began pioneering in an effort to rack up "brownie points" with Jehovah to ensure my survival.

Today, I am 23 years out of the JWs. I still think about death, perhaps moreso than people with non-JW backgrounds do. However, I've learned to "get my eyes off the prize" and keep focused on living in the here and now. The joy is in the journey.

Unfortunately, for all too many JWs, "Millions now dying will never live."

Double Edge

Sorry, never been a dub, so I don't have some of those fears. In fact, life scares me more than death, but I'm not ready to check out just yet.... just continuing on my journey, seeing what's around the corner. By the way, have you ever seen the tv show CROSSING OVER WITH JOHN EDWARDS? It's on the sci-fi channel and it's syndicated around the country. There are people who like to pooh pooh these experiences, but if you watch 3 or more shows, you'd find it pretty convincing that there's more to 'life' than what we can see with our physical eyes. For all you non-believers, please spare me the "proofs" of non-existance, we've been over this before ad naseum. If nothing else, the show is an uplifting one and is positive, which is what we need more of in this wonderful, sometimes 'negative' world. (my 2 cents)

William Penwell

My mortality was one thing that was a rude awaking to me after leaving the dubs. Growing up we were brain washed into thinking that we would never die but goo on living forever. I recall something that Wayne Dyer said, "Only when you come to terms with your mortality than you will start to live"

Will

SM62

When I was a kid I was pretty morbid and thought about death quite a bit for a young 'un. It mainly started after my dad died when I was 9.

When I became a JW I was so happy to have the answers I had been looking for. I stopped fearing death.

Since I started to draw away from the WTS, I am back to the way I was as a child. I think about death a lot. I don't mean to - the thoughts just creep into my head. I wish I knew the answers to all my questions. I get down about it quite a lot. I feel as if I have lost something. As a JW, I thought I knew why I was here and where I was going. Now I just don't know any more and I feel on edge most of the time.

Terri

shera

I had them for 10 yrs after I left the JW's.I still have them but after comming here they have become less frequent,thankfully.Just about everynight I would wake up in a panic.Sometimes I would run around trying to get my kids,because I felt their life was at risk.Good thing I would click in and realize nothing bad was going to happen.After so many yrs of having them I was able to control them,you just have to tell yourself,the feelings your having are real,but death isn't going to be the result and the feeling will pass.

Heather

Death anxiety......ever happen to you?

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