Death anxiety......ever happen to you?

by shotgun 20 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  ellderwho

  I think death as a Jw is twofold. On one hand you have the belief of never having to experience it.

  The other just plain ole dying and being reborn into "paradise." But as I tell my(2nd gen) Jw mom, wouldnt it be better to die now so you wouldnt have to do all that manual labor for a few hundred years making the earth a paradise for all the non-Jws from historys past. If it were me Id rather be brought back with everything all ready done(paradise that is).

  My own death anxieties were squelched with my beliefs.

  Lets face it the non-Jw death is easier than the death of the un-believer in the Bible.
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  mizpah

  As a Jehovah's Witness the belief that we could live through Armageddon and live forever on a paradise earth was so pervasive that I never thought about death and dying. But once I left the organization, the one reality that dawned on me was that I was going to die some day.

  However, it had a positive effect. As a JW I always looked to the future for enjoyment and pleasure. The present was just a means of getting there. But now, the reality of death makes me appreciate every day of life. I can now "take time to smell the flowers" because I am no longer caught up in the race and pace of a Watchtower schedule.
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  shotgun

  Thanks everyone.... mizpah ..great advice although old Noah would say shotgun and mizpah took no note.

  But now, the reality of death makes me appreciate every day of life. I can now "take time to smell the flowers" because I am no longer caught up in the race and pace of a Watchtower schedule.

  But since I don't believe Noah lived to be 900 yrs old or saved the world of mankind old Noah can stuff his condescending tone back in the ark and have another drink of vino
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  oldcrowwoman

  I experienced death anxiety when first entering into cronehood with my changes with womanhood. I face death everyday on my job. I wonder what their thoughts were and their process with dying. Asking questions of self. When am I going to die? How am I going to die? I am not so anal about it now.

  I did experience when being a single parent. I prayed til the summer of 1991 wishing not to die. Because I wanted to see my children become of age and able to care for themselves. The fear of having their father take care of them. The girls are survivors of sexual abuse. I wanted to make damn sure they were safe. When the youngest became of age. A huge relief!!

  So at this time in my life I relish the moment to moment.

  Old Crow
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  Special K

  Hey Shotgun..

  I'm wondering if what you are experiencing happens more with ones who were raised in the J.W. religion.

  I experienced those same anxiety about death and dying that you speak of..when I left it.

  In fact, it got really really bad when I first left, and then when I was d'fd.. it intensified even more.

  ..so I think what's happenning to you is NORMAL... a fear of death and the unknown..

  Before this time.. you knew everything about death and dying and where and what you were going to be doing.

  Many people of the world,..believe in going to heaven when they die and that is what consoles them

  But now, You.. just like me.. are calling into question everything you were cultized in.

  some people easily transfer to another religion,, but for someone like me.. and possibly yourself this may never feel right to you.

  It's an extreme blow to the psyche to come to the realization that all that you were taught and believed in is a falsehood. It's kind of like a "spiritual type of rape" has taken place. A severe traumatization of your core belief system. Therefore as the psche grapples with this .. the bad dreams or anxiety attacks...especially the ones about death may occur

  When you finally come to the realization that there is no ressurrection,.. no armageddon.. and all that stuff. It leaves a type of emptiness there where those belief systems were.

  Shotgun,.. your psyche has been dealt a great blow and needs time to heal and stabilize itself...until then you may continue to experience some of these anxiety attacks.

  As your mind and heart comes to an ACCEPTANCE of these things and adopts other beliefs that fit you, . .then it will ease up.

  sincerely...((((Shotgun)))

  special k
• 

  RAYZORBLADE

  The only thing I would worry about, now....is if I died, and my poor little birdies here would be here unattended to, because they love people so much.

  That would bother me.

  I could die at anytime, and have experienced the deaths of close friends and family.

  I have to admit, I have to admit the loss of a couple of very dear friends within 1 year of each other, caused me more heartache, as I had NO close friends anymore.

  I'm picking up again, but it isn't easy.

  Death anxiety, I guess in some ways yes, it's being left with a void, when someone you love and care about, goes so unexpectedly.

  But I do know what you mean Shotgun, when I first left the JWs 20 years ago, it was not easy, and I felt like 'Armageddon' would happen soon.

  It gets better with time.
• 

  SheilaM

  ShoGun:

  I have had this since I was little. I take welbutrin each night at 7:00 and I don't have it now. It is horrible
• 

  beckyboop

  Yes, especially on 9/11. That day was such a turning point in my mind, because I had to make a conscious decision in what I KNEW in my heart to be true--that it wasn't armageddon, that I wasn't a bad person who was going to die at the hands of the oh-so-loving Jehovah. (my father saying "This is it, this is it" kinda helped in a weird sort of way) I have had many other times where I thought about it over and over; but when something like that happens and you have to actively and with full consciousness change your mind, it helped open up my thinking process. Every little thing like that helps me shed another layer of JW type thinking.

  Last year though, I lost my older brother, my uncle, and my grandmother (they didn't even call me about my grandma)--within about 6 months. Although I wasn't very close to them for various reasons, I still had to deal with their loss--especially when I see my niece and nephew, or my aunt, or even worse, my mom. I know in my heart that although I'm sad, the ones that died are now ok--wherever/whatever that might be. My brother's life was a very sad one, and it was no surprise (unfortunately) to me when I was contacted with the news.

  I certainly think about death NOW though in a totally different way--but probably about the same amount as before. I am not afraid of it at all, because it's something that I pretty much have no control over (unless I choose it). I am much more interested in figuring out how not to FEAR it when it does happen to people I know and love--but somehow embracing it. Thanks for such a thought provoking topic--it certainly struck a chord in me tonight.

  Becky
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  Special K

  BTT
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  Blueblades

  I am in the process of reading "The Denial of Death by Ernest Becker."Freud had Death Anxiety all his life.He couldn't shake it.

  Since leaving the WT.Society the last couple of years I too am suffering from Death Anxiety every day,I can't shake it .I am fearful of the UNKNOWN,and what happens when we die I don't know.I try to keep busy in the affairs of every day living,I work with the elderly,70,80,90 yrs.of age and would like to live a long life so as to see my children and their families grow.and then maybe then I'll be able to rid myself of this Death Anxiety.

  Blueblades