Like most people who are born into a family of standard belief systems--a heritage, I was brought up to believe in God, Jesus, and the various bible stories. I always believed that the Bible was absolutely God's Word. That carried on into my early twenties, after I had been baptized a JW since age 14. Then, I began to "grow up" and figure out some things on my own. Even though I was told that my questions and ideas were "apostate", I could not help myself. The guilt from trying to be what everyone else said I should be was a tough journey.
Although I realized that the JW belief system had misled me, I still very much believed that the Bible was still God's Word. I wondered about many things in there, but never really took personal responsibility for a further in depth personal study until my early 50's. The JW influence did a real number on me, and I put my one and only bible on the shelf where it gathered lots of dust. Religion was just something that I put on the back burner because it hurt too much. After the JW experience, I frankly didn't know what was true, real, believable and "divine".
Of course, after finally doing the personal research and studying various other religions and belief systems, translations of the bible, references, etc., I came to the conclusion that the Bible is just a mix-mash of writings that certain men in high positions decided they would put together and say it was the Word of God. It's just a history book, and has many gaps and leaves many unanswered questions. Sometimes it reads like a badly written history book, a bunch of fairy tales, poetry, and some prophetic dreams. It really downplays women altogether, and has actually left out other books and manuscripts that eluded to subjects and information they did not want the mass of people to know about.
I feel so free now. Free of religious dogma and corruption, but more spiritually alive than ever in my life. I know that Jesus was a real person in history. I tend to think he was a very advanced soul when born among men. He was enlightened. Mary was enlightened as well, which is why they made a good pair. It's so obvious now, with all the available information coming to light, that we have been duped. Our major foundations for Christianity are pillaged. People who had faith in a "book" are now beginning to question their entire life foundation. Critical for so many who have left the responsibility to their Church leaders, and who now realize there are major, major flaws.
However, faith to me, is not a book and not a person. It is a spiritual journey of the soul, which we take part in. When the soul has completed it's eons of birth and death within the various human shell, it will have lived many lives and experienced all the lessons; it will be time to receive the reward of going home at last. Our lifespan of under 100 years is such a small portion of this journey, but our part will always be remembered by the unit soul. This answers so many of my prior questions, and draws all of mankind together, where religion has separated. I feel very comfortable knowing that all is as it should be. It's just a shame that man has taken part in his own distortion of truth, and this has affected and delayed the search for enlightenment for so many, who have for the most part, believed that going to a church or meeting place is all there is.
This is where I'm coming from, JT. There is so much more. But we each have to find our own way.
