From heavy-handed morality to no morality

by logansrun 23 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  logansrun

  waiting,

  I didn't mean to imply that all ex-JWs go through this sort of recklessness or that they as a group are less moral than the average person. I think it is safe to say, though, that many ex-JWs (esp. younger ones) do go through a period of doing some very destructive things -- drugs, drunk-driving, unprotected sex, etc...

  I've talked with many ex-JWs who have said this is the case, in their experience. I've also studied about this topic with regard other high control groups. It's human nature, and makes sense psychologically. Usually, after a brief period of recklessness upon leaving, people do one of two things:

  1) they go back to the dubs; I've seen this time and time again or

  2) they straighten up on their own.

  Marlene Winnell, in her book entitled "Leaving the Fold," wrote about this very issue. I think it is safe to say that it is a challenge for some.

  Bradley
• 

  czarofmischief

  I busted loose, and did a lot of what people might call "reckless". I guess I still haven't settled down, because I really like having fun and partying and stuff - drugs and booze and stuff.

  Although the czarina keeps a rather firm rein on my crazier impulses - I have bipolar disorder which makes the whole situation highly individual. Sometimes I need a drink in order to reduce the serotonin in my brain so I can sleep or have a normal conversation, and sometimes I can't touch the stuff without puking or attempting suicide - I dunno, maybe I'm not somebody who should be included in a survey like this. I might skew the numbers towards the reckless because of my illness and not because of my religo-philosophical background.

  ALTHOUGH I must say that I have more fun celebrating the holidays than I do or did with drugs and booze. It's a tastier pleasure, just so, I don't know, BLASPHEMOUS to be carving a jack-o-lantern. I'm buying xmas decorations this week and I feel so mischievous, I think I'll decorate the tree with WT propaganda.

  CZAR
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  waiting

  Hello Bradley,

  I think it is safe to say, though, that many ex-JWs (esp. younger ones) do go through a period of doing some very destructive things -- drugs, drunk-driving, unprotected sex, etc...

  I think it's safe to say that some do. Some just sleep late on Sunday morning.

  I understand what you're saying............and agree more..........now that you're qualifying your statements. If you'd started that way, well, we wouldn't be having this conversation.

  So perhaps it's better this way, eh?

  waiting
• 

  Eric

  Bradley, logansrun, (I get confused when people have two names...)

  I was raised a JW and got out in my mid-teens. Every potentially enjoyable thing that they'd railed against, everything they'd put up on a high shelf out of my reach, I simply had to climb up, take down, open up and try on. Drugs, all kinds, sex (yeah, even tried homosex, lots of suitors but couldn't get it up for another man), alchohol to the point that it cost me something, partied until I was jaded.

  In all that, I never once felt then, or now, that I had no morality. I made some bad choices, there are a few (very few) things I would change. But I never lost the bearings on my moral compass where it matters: "Do unto others as you would see done unto you."

  I never stole things from others.

  I didn't have to become a liar to persue my pleasures.

  I never hurt anyone for the sake of my desires. Didn't have to.

  Never abandonned a friend in need.

  Actually became more aware of my community, the value of volunteering, charitable works.

  Learned to take responsibilty for events in my life, good and bad, rather than blaming Satan and his wicked sytem of things or praising Allah, Zeus, Jesus Christ, Jehovah God and his Faithful and Discrete Slave.

  So Bradley, I'm asking, with great respect, in what way do you believe my recklessness, or indeed the recklessness of anyone else who left the JW's constitutes a move to "no morality"?

  Eric