OH, not caring....the timing is always interesting 1) dropping by unannounced without calling first to see if it is convenient for you (no other contact yet) 2) conversation starts with accusing you or family member of doing something wrong based on a report of some unnamed person 3) if you share a challenge in your life, it becomes your fault, not attending meetings, not going d2d, etc., all without listening to what you have said.
2 elders called unannounced on an older sister with a non-jw husband. She had missed meetings for 6 weeks. No one thought to call and see how she was doing. The husband came to the door and looked at them with disgust; she had died 3 weeks before, a funeral had been held and the obit had been posted in the paper. The husband had been busy taking his wife to the doctor and hospital.and then the funeral arrangements. The elders excuse, they never read the newspaper....which was a lie...they read it everyday to keep up on sports but never turned to the obit page.
The elder who told me this was one of those elders and was embarrassed to some degree, but that did not stop him from just dropping by unannounced.
Dropping by like that is not only not showing love, it is showing that they don't care about the person and are just covering their rear end, CO visit usually.