Hey everyone, I'm writing a new book.
It's the entirely fictional story about a character called "Roy Devons", an obese clown who was kicked out of clown college because he couldn't stop touching himself. He launches his own YouTube channel where he tells the world how wrong and unfunny clowns really are. The world already knows this, and never really had much todo with clowns anyway, although some other ex-clowns felt like they needed to be reminded regularly of their past lives.
He hits upon the idea of asking for donations to support efforts to convince ex-clowns to get their prostates checked. A worthy cause that no one could object to, and members of the Ex-Clown Assholes reddit group voice their support.
But instead of helping anyone, he goes on a luxury vacation where he meets some young prostitutes, and decides to spend the money on them instead. Not to help any of them escape their misery, but to help himself. Finally, he isn't just some sad, fat, ex-clown touching himself. Now he's a sad, fat, ex-clown paying hookers to touch him instead. It makes him feel happy.
Upon his return he discovers that word of his touchy-touchy has gotten out, and some ex-clowns now think he's disgusting, while others, mostly the Assholes group, think he's heroic. He gives a speech about how his life was once one of misery, how he was altered forever by someone finding him touching himself while wearing official clown garments, and how he now finally feels free. Also, that he's keeping the rest of the money.
Clown media lights up over the revelations and there is much debate.
A few years later he dies alone from AIDS caught off a cheap Thai hooker.
The end.
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