14 things to do in walmart!

by ChimChim 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • ChimChim
    ChimChim

    haha, I just recieved this email... I thought it was too funny, while you read it just picture yourself doing it!!!

    ** 14 THINGS TO DO IN A WALMART WHILE YOUR WIFE OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER IS TAKING THEIR SWEET TIME SHOPPING!**

    1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

    2. Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.

    3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.

    8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

    9. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knowswhere the antidepressants are.

    10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."

    11. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels

    12. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say, "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

    13.When an anouncement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again

    .....and last but not least,

    14. Go into a fitting room and yell loudly, "Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here!"

    C.C

  • LuckyNun
    LuckyNun

    were #4, #5, #6 and #7 just too damn dirty for our virgin eyes?

  • Oxnard Hamster
    Oxnard Hamster

    Heheheh I've seen some of those before. Some others I recall are:

    1. Randomly chuck things into other aisles.

    2. Go to an unused register and try to check people out.

    3. Toy aisle: X-Men vs. G.I. Joe. Place your bets.

    4. Stretch out on a lawn chair in the lawn and garden aisle. If anyone says anything, explain that you don't get out much.

    5. When workers make announcements over the speakers, put on a confused look and scream "It's the voices again!"

  • ChimChim
    ChimChim
    were #4, #5, #6 and #7 just too damn dirty for our virgin eyes?

    hmmm they arent even in the email that my friend sent to me???? strange

    C.C

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief

    grab the mike and demand a cleanup in random aisles.

    CZAR

  • ChimChim
    ChimChim
    rofl, chim chim, stop being bad, lol

    MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.... I'm not bad its the person who made those up that is bad lolol!! I think*grins*

    C.C

  • morty
    morty

    very cute chim -chim......what happened to the rest though?...were they to nasty to post?

    morty

  • joannadandy
    joannadandy

    Eyegirl and I are big fans of taking little naps on the futons at walmart at 2:30 in the morning...it's always fine and dandy until the Hmong family in the bedding aisle starts screaming at each other....then you just move on to the clearance thongs and look for things fuchia and with spangles!!

  • Wolfgirl
    Wolfgirl
    10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."

    I have actually done that before. It was hilarious! Good fun.

    (Edited coz I can't spell today.)

  • stichione
    stichione

    Here are the missing items #4-7 for the Walmart joke. Enjoy!

    4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,' Code 3 in housewares',...and see what happens.

    5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

    6. Move a 'CAUTION WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

    7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

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