Where do you get that sense to determine what is loving or unloving? - Johnny Boy
Jesus told us exactly what love is. 'No man hath seen God at any time; the only begotten Son, which is in the bosom of the Father, he hath declared him.' John 1:18
So what does Jesus and the other inspired bible writers reveal about the meaning of love? Let's not judge god by our own standards but by his own words.
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I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous... Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. - Matt. 5
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Matt. 6
But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. - Luke 6
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. - Luke 12
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. - Jas.1
"Love ... always protects" - 1 Cor.13
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By god's own testimony then we can see that love is pretty much what we might have assumed from our own personal experience. Love involves concern for the welfare of others and, crucially, positive actions that promote the wellbeing of others.
So your accusation that we cannot presume to judge god because we can't understand the meaning of love is false. By comparing his own words with his actions recorded in the bible and the reality of our world we can conclude that GOD IS NOT LOVE.