Observations From an Ex-Elder Part 3 - Searching for the Lost Sheep

by doubtfull1799 41 Replies latest jw experiences

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  smiddy

  My wife and I left just over20 years ago and nobobody after 33 years as a slave of the WT bothered to even try to re-ignite" the first love for the "truth"" we once had and we were considered to be in the inner circle of the congregation.All we did was fade away .

  It was only about 5 years ago that I sent in myDA letter to the KH after many years here.

  They are all talk and no action everybody leaves it up to somebody else and nothing ever gets done when it comes to sheperding,looking after the lost /strayed sheep.
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  Nicholaus Kopernicus

  Doubtfull1799:

  Your experience comes as no surprise to me. The JW organisation is one which is highly stratified / directive. Thus, the organisation cannot produce shepherds as such. The focus of the organisation in practice is that of policing its affiliates. Therefore, its "shepherds" tend to function as de facto police officers such is the appalling environment of influence which they are constantly exposed to. This is rather like the temple police in the first century who carried out the direction of the then ecclesiastical authority (Sanhedrin). Their role also parallels the muttawa (spiritual police) in Saudi Arabia and Malaysia to an extent.

  In terms of shepherding, being encouraging, supportive, comforting, and other higher functioning in the realms of counselling and catharsis, my assessment is that by far, most BoEs in the JW org are just not capacitous.

  Their dysfunction reminds me of the cliché - "They who expect nothing shall not be disappointed!"
  
  
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  closed

  Hi. Ex elder here. I had been one for nearly 20 years, special pioneer for 5, I think.

  I used to be a butthole sometimes, I have to admit. Never power hungry though.

  I think what many of us suffer from, is dissonance between the org as it really is and as , we believe it should be. Of course, based on natural human feelings and the Bible we imagine it is love based and driven. Everybody in wants to do his or her best for God and fellow humans (actually I am sure there are many decent people in the org). It mirrors what we feel and are.

  But in reality.. the more we are in the org, we know more and we see it is just our imagination. People are as everywhere power hungry, stupid, lazy, nasty. And at the same time many are lovely, helpful, genuine.

  My conclusion for now is. In or out the Borg it is exactly the same poo pond. I spoke to ex Coe minister. He said that the church thought him that no one is interested in the truth. The bloke was bloody right.

  As the book says: there is nothing better than to eat, to drink, and enjoy your wife;) Do not torment yourself. Enjoy what you have got.

  All the best to you.
  

  Still,
  
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  joe134cd

  Yes I had a very similar experience to you. This was a thread I posted just after I physically stopped attending meetings 3 years ago. Trust me they done you the favor

  https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/274424/how-many-cong-visited-you-when-you-started-fading
  
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  The Searcher

  Doubtfull - some of the realities we faced when we left the org are hurtful, but the blessings often far outweigh what initially hurt us. I wish you and yours greater contentment in your new life.

  "A friend [when you are] in need, is a friend indeed!"

  A J.W. when in need, becomes a troublesome liability - one to be avoided at all costs.

  In every congregation I've attended, it was the same scenario.

  So much for the hallmark of true Christians! (John 13:35)
  
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  stuckinarut2

  Yep, I understand what you mean doubtful!

  No matter what you ever did for the society, congregation or individuals, you are seeing that it was all CONDITIONAL on you being an active witness.

  It matters not about the parables Jesus gave, if the culture the GB has created and fostered overrides that.

  I can just see witnesses saying something like "why bring Jesus into this discussion?!"
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  Half banana

  Interesting Doubtful, the JW cult is to do with appearances and conforming to the expectations of being a member of the club. Paradoxically they often take the scriptures in a literal way but don't take the spirit of Christianity to heart. Not that I recommend the need for that because we can do good without being told what to do.

  I faded and then stopped attending completely, what an enormous relief! I expected a visit or two but instead around six or seven weeks later an elder who I knew well called by and told me, as if under instruction, that he was only calling to check whether I was leaving because I had become an active and vocal apostate. Of course I denied that, that was to happen later. But the point of his visit was not for my welfare but to stem possible anti JW sentiment and disfellowship me. I was never bothered again.
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  ttdtt

  I have that Ironical feeling - Having been a long time elder and just faded away left me flabbergasted at how just about NO one reached out. Never even got email requests for Service Time.

  And on the other side - SO Grateful for them not wanting to reach out at all.
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  ToesUp

  "I think what many of us suffer from, is dissonance between the org as it really is and as , we believe it should be."

  This statement sums up what it is all about in WT land. Spot on!

  So if the Elders treat other Elders (one's who have stepped down) with such lack of love and concern, how do the Elders treat the average publisher?

  I'm not sure if anyone caught it in the Bunker video but it was said, "our message has changed to a message of judgement." This is what I feel this has come down to. I guess their true colors are shining through.

  We were on the Elders radar until we stopped turning time in. We left without a word and have not shared anything with anybody. We had one Elder who was on a full out witch hunt. The only thing he wanted was us OUT. That was his main goal, to get us OUT. We never gave him the satisfaction and never will.

  It's a man made organization that I compare to the scripture..."whitewashed graves full of dead mens bones."

  If this is the true religion and I loose my life over it, I choose a lifetime dirt nap over spending eternity with these destructive, abusive and cruel people.
  
  
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  Giordano

  I think the real reason for the disconnect everyone is talking about is this..............There are two things necessary to be a JW in good standing.............. Faith and Obedience.

  Of the two......... Obedience is the most important.