Dear Hippikon,
When I first discovered the truth about the “troof,” I felt a duty to share that good news as actively as I once had shared what I’d learned as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. I was a true believer in a new cause, and I would be the Moses in my family, leading my parents and sisters out of an organization that rules by fear, guilt, and lies.
I slowly came to realize that when people are ready for this sort of information, they will look for it or ask questions. I thought back over my own experience of coming out and realized it happened very slowly over a period spanning more than fifteen years. When I was ready to face the answers to my hard questions, I did.
I also came to realize that I do not want the rest of my life to be a reaction to having once been one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. If I do that, they have as much control over me as they ever did while I was in. There are many people, religions, and organizations that hurt people by coercion, propaganda, and unethical influence. Toppling the Tower is too narrow a focus for me. Instead I would rather help people educate themselves so they are able to make informed choices.
Still, I am especially sensitive to and interested in Jehovah’s Witness issues. I see exposing the Watchtower Society for what it is as part of helping people make informed choices.
I can’t help but think of a quote from Les Sectes en France:
Several speakers for the Commission highlighted this paradox: What is odd about cults is that, particularly during the process leading to membership, the victim is an actor [‘actor’ in the literal sense of one who acts, one who does, is not a passive victim]. A certain parallel can be established with the stages of drug addicts: "We have controversies with parents of drug addicts. These parents think—and in a way, they’re right--that without the horrible dealer their child would be an angel. They forget the nine tenths of the way that the unfortunate child traversed, responsibly or not, but of his own will, to go into the arms of the aforesaid dealer. One should not forget the voluntary share of the follower, who is not an imbecile that one would manipulate--it is you and me--, but (...) who went deliberately." In this light, the cult recruiters could be regarded as "dealers of transcendence." In this respect, an analogy used by a person heard by the Commission seems to clearly illustrate the conscious character of the steps of the future follower: "Cults are not a net that falls down on people, but a lobster trap into which they swim."[rough translation mine]
Not being familiar with lobster traps, I looked them up: http://www.stfx.ca/people/gbayesp/lobstertrap.htm
I found that “Every trap has one or more funnel-shape openings fashioned from twine, which allow the lobster to enter the trap but prevent it from escaping.”
After coming out, it is easy to assume the victim role and to think that if we just stop this horrible organization, all will be well. I think the organization does much harm, but I try to remember that I was not a completely passive victim. I was an idealist who wanted to believe in a future utopia at any cost. I was afraid to let go of this belief, afraid that I would drift out into an ocean of despair. While I pity those who have chosen to stay inside the lobster trap, I also understand their fear and need for security.
I don’t want to kick the crutches out from under anyone. I feel free to discuss and debate on this discussion board because I feel that anyone who comes here has made a choice to listen to many diverse opinions and ideas. On the other hand, my father still believes that the Jehovah’s Witnesses have the truth, and I do not push information on him. If he asks, I will tell what I know. In the meantime, I encourage him to think for himself about other less sensitive subjects. My hope is that these skills will carry over into his JW life.
Each person has to decide how best to use his time. Sometimes I feel like debating with bigots; other times it feels like a complete waste of time. It’s hard to know when a little something you say or share affects someone’s life. I do what I can, trying to make the best use of what I have to offer. I hope you find a way to make a difference that is satisfying for you, Hippikon.
Ginny
