Jealousy, and why it has no place in a relationship

by Maverick 12 Replies latest social relationships

• 

  Sassy

  My boyfriend claims he is not the jealous type and I THINK he is sincere. I haven't seen signs that he is. When a guy called that I used to 'see', he was like invite him over.. I thought, why?? he was interested in me, why would you want him here? He said, I don't have a problem with him being here. I am the one you are with..

  However, before it was him and I, when we were just getting to know each other online and he was showing 'some interest' but it wasn't as deep yet, we were just in the 'let's meet and see where it goes stage', no commitments yet, I had to admit to him I had to get off the phone and of course he asked why. Well I don't lie and he told me never to lie to him. I told him, well I have this guy coming over and I need my phone free so that when he buzzes my apartment it will go through on the phone............ He told me later, that was the day that he decided he was falling for me. He realized how much he didn't want me with another man.

  Now me, personally.. well I have a little jealous side. I try not to show it. but he has talked to other women online at times that he met before me and yes, I talk to friends from here both male and female.. but I do get jealous when I see it is a woman he is talking to... I can't help it..
• 

  Maverick

  Sassy you and Xena bring up good points from the ladies side of this issue. I don't have a problem with my lady friends being a little jealous when they see me talking to other women. I have seen more than once, when I was in a conversation with a woman, my lady would come by and touch me...it was her way of saying, "He's taken..back off!" I act like I don't catch it.

  I have felt a tinge of jealousy when caught off guard...the key is to hold your emotions close to your vest, let the moment pass, and stay cool! But as with this fellow the other night, I was ready to nail him with a beer bottle across his nose if he upset the lady. Just cause I'm sitting there all calm and quite doesn't mean I would not act if I felt he crossed the line! Funny thing is she is more dangerous than I am, unless I'm packing and I don't carry a gun much anymore, ( and you can't carry one in a bar anyway)! So as stated it is natural to feel threatened at times, but to hold jealousy in check. We are adults..right? Maverick
• 

  sandy

  Jealousy is a natural emotion. Like others already stated here we are adults and it is important to keep our emotions in line and to not act crazy or hasty when feelings of jealousy arise.

  When I am in a relationship and a girl is talking to my boyfriend or even flirting with him I do not do or say anything. But afterward I make sure he knows I was jealous. I never make it a big heated argument but I do discuss it with him. And he can definitely hear the jealousy in my voice and see it on my face.

  My would get a little upset and ask me questions if a guy was talking to me. He wouldn't be so calm about it but he never made me afraid of him.

  My point: It is nice to know when a significant other that you truly care about gets a little jealous over you.

  It feeds one's ego.