JWs and marital intimacies. What is the current view???

by brojo 21 Replies latest jw friends

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  brojo

  In the 70s the WT published that certain practices between marriage partners such as oral sex were wrong and could result in disfellowshipping. We all remember the havoc it wreaked on marriages especially where a non jw mate was involved. They later backed away from this position. Later sometime in the 80s they seemed to again put the practice off limits and warned of possible sanctions if the couple "advocated" such practices or if it became known. (Unlike their earlier position, elders were not to initiate any investigations or go on "witch hunts"). Can anyone tell me if this is the current position. If not, what is their policy on this issue. I've been out for close to 15 years.

  Thanks
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  Loris

  The don't ask and don't tell policy is still in effect.

  Loris
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  badwillie

  I think they just want everyone to use their head on this matter, and not let their morals go down.
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  cruzanheart

  I think they just want everyone to use their head on this matter

  Which head? Wasn't that the original complaint?

  Nina
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  worldlygirl

  I think they just want everyone to use their head on this matter, and not let their morals go down.

  ROFLMAO at badwillie!!!!
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  SixofNine

  I think the official line would still be "don't ask, don't misbehave". In practice, I think for most congregations it's "don't ask, don't tell, but you'd really have to preach your practice to the world before anyone would try to instigate congregational action against you".

  The closest thing they've come to a retraction of their former position on this is a mention of oral sex being practiced by teenagers, condemning the teens for thinking they could get away with something by not having full on intercourse, but not condemning the practice itself as being anything other than a sex act they can nail you for.

  So far, still no Awake articles titled "The Show Must Go On ~ Island Nuptials Go Forward Even During Menses! The cunning linguist of Fela Tio atoll in the South Pacific have learned about a special gift from Jah...."
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  gitasatsangha

  A friend of mine on the inside said that their congo recently had a local needs talk given on the dangers of sodomy, and that the person giving the talk got pretty graphic, and infact stated that it was a disfellowshipping offense, even for married couples.

  (I can imagine it now.. "Friends.. Jehovah is a happy god. and he doesn't want you poor sisters having a hard time sitting through this spiritual food, what with your distended rectums, and your sore knees.. so let us be thankful for this loving direction from..")

  Either this body of elders is renegade and taking matters way into their own hands, or they had direction from somewhere to have this local needs talk.
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  Sassy

  I am sure it is the 'don't bring it up, and there will be no waves, but if you it is brought up, we have to do something about it..

  I was told that even elders or MS's could lost priviledges if they verbally admit having oral, etc..

  If some wife comes to the elders and says she is being forced to do something, then they have to address it. Although I don't think it is usually to the point of a local needs talk.

  My first husband and I always knew things were taboo.. we just never talked to the elders about it. What went on in our bedroom wasn't their business..
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  Elsewhere

  Which head? Wasn't that the original complaint?

  Booooo!!! Ssssssss!!!
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  Mary

  I think they just want everyone to use their head on this matter, and not let their morals go down.

  What was that??? They want everyone to use head but not go down? Well that really sucks. Oops!