For me it was reading Crisis of Conscience. By the time I got around to reading it, I already knew plenty about them and we were slowly fading, but wanted to stay connected in a minimal way to keep our social life. But............after reading C of C, I could no longer stomach attending meetings, or anything about them. We never went back.
The straw that broke the camel's back
by Satans little helper 31 Replies latest jw experiences
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mrs rocky2
KH remodel discussions. Many in the congregation wanted to be conservative in spending so excess money could be sent to worldwide building fund. Just prior to this time the KM had an article about how the funds were distributed and that there were congregations in other countries that didn't have a place to meet, they were sitting on crates out in the forest. So why not save locally, not borrow from WT, so WT could use those excess funds to help in these poorer countries as was indicated in the KM article. The majority of the elder body railroaded the meeting, pushed the PO out of the way, told us we were selfish for thinking about our brothers in poorer countries, because after all "they were used to sitting on boxes" to quote one of the elders. We also heard around this time from JWs in another state, that in California, if the KH wasn't the nicest building in the neighborhood, the JWs couldn't effectively witness to the wealthy, and were denied access to closed gated communities. The CO visited the congregation around this same time (originiated in California, Michael Jackson's congregation) dressed in his Armani suit, and forced the KH remodel to go through, ignoring legal parlimentary procedure (required by this state - KH building is operated by a corporation). The greedy, showy display didn't fit with what we had read about the humble beginnings of Christianity. WT was looking more like the Catholic church that WT had condemned for fleecing the flock. It was evident that the meek and mild were not as important as money and power. It was a beginning of our eyes being opened.
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Special K
Thanks for the pm.. and another pm flying your way
Special k
(ps. never every thought I'd say thanks to "Satans Little Helper".. sounds so un-jw like. LOL
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trumangirl
When i started parttime university I cottoned on that you can't say you know what's true till you've considered the counter-argument, which we weren't allowed to do because that was apostate territory. At the same time a close relative got DF'd and I realised how cultish the DF policy was. These insights helped me take the step to go on internet when a close relative sent me a link to ewatchman. Internet confirmed my doubts, along with Ray Franz' books.
After learning all the hypocrisy and untruth of the GB, I thought of staying on to the odd meeting for some social and spiritual fellowship, but realised that I would eventually talk, be labelled and possibly DF'd. So my efforts to build friendships were hollow. So stopped attending.
Trumangirl
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got my forty homey?
The final straw for me was reading Christian Freedom. Before that the lead up was my year at Bethel. This supposed spirtual paradise was nothing more than a mix of THX1138 and 1984. A corporation with deadlines and bottom lines. Rascism and favortism. After my year I knew I wasn't going to be a witness any more. I read Christian Freedom in 1998 and I left Bethel in 1988, so it took 10 years for me to get all of the doubts out of my mind.
And believe it or not, I still get the urge to attend a meeting now and then, why? I dont know, but I quickly wake up out of that nightmare.
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trumangirl
THX1138 - what is that? is it like DDT or TNT?
Trumangirl
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Winston Smith :>D
For me it was beards.
Funny, for me it was the mustaches...
... I could never figure out why some sisters wouldn't just wax that thing off
Actually, it was when I saw in a library book that 607 was false and the real date was 587.
After that, I started questioning the GB's authority, saw that they are a bunch of paper tigers, and the rest fell down like a house of cards.
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got my forty homey?
It was a movie about a underground society controlled by computers and pills. It was a very wierd movie, something like logans run. It starred a young Robert Duvall in it and I believe it was the first movie the Star Wars guy created.
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cyber-sista
When I tried to seek help from the CO to get unreasonable insane elders off my back the CO backed the elders up and told me what he had to do was emotionally separate himself from his family so he wouldn't feel so bad when they died (referring to Armegeddon) He was expecting me to do the same. His comment opened my eyes...
Guess he didn't read the part in his bible about the last days "they would have no natural affection"
PS that was just one straw--I've got a haybale of others.
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Wickid
My wife and I had been married for a few years, and were still doing barely enough to stay in the good graces of the cult, but all the while slowly beginning to think for ourselves. We attended a district convention one summer and sat through the first day's morning session. We watched as a seemingly endless parade of people young and old, were marched across the stage as shining examples to follow, along with cheesy, canned experiences. We also got to hear about how wonderful the organization was and how happy we were.
We broke for lunch and went to the car to get the food. We got in to eat in the car because we would surely be acosted if we went back in for lunch by sister nosy about where we have been and what congregation we were going to now. We both looked at each other and without saying a word, cried profusely; we knew. We knew that we no longer believed the things were were taught since preschool. We cried out of bitterness over years wasted, and for family we dearly loved that would never speak to us again. It was just such an entirely different perspective looking at the trees from outside of the forest. It's so amazing to think that we accepted indoctrination by rote as 'bible study'. We didn't go back in for our books, and we've never been back since.
As an aside, I've recently moved to another area, and it took them almost 2 weeks find me. I tried in vain to engage them in a thought-provoking conversation at my door, and it was predictably silly. It's like talking to a doorknob. The worst part of it is that they are so smug and judgmental. I finally just had to politely end the conversation with: "You know, if you are still required to keep house-to-house records, go ahead and mark me down as a goat." My wife suggested that I should have sealed the deal by answering the door nekkid. :)
Excellent thread by the way.