Things You Have to Believe to Be a Republican Today:
1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an
illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
2. The United States should get out of the United
Nations, but our highest national priority should be
to enforce U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
3. Government should relax regulation of Big Business
and Big Money, but crack down on individuals who use
marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.
4. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.
5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her
own body, but multinational corporations can make
decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
6. Jesus loves you and shares your hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
7. The best way to improve military mor ale is to
praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans'
benefits and combat pay.
8. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins ...
unless you someday run for governor of California as a
Republican.
9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.
10. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and
money.
11. HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of
the public at heart.
12. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is
socialism.
13. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.
14. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad
guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when
Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush
needed a "We can't find Bin Laden" diversion. < BR>
15. A president lying about an extramarital affair is
an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist
support for a war in which thousands die is solid
defense policy.
16. Government should limit itself to the powers named
in the Constitution, which include banning gay
marriages and censoring the Internet.
17. The public has a right to know about Hillary's
cattle trades, but George Bush's MADD driving record
is none of our business.
18. You support states' rights, which means Attorney
General John Ashcroft can tell states which local
voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.
19. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital
national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is
irrelevant.
20. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a spirit of international harmony.
This is in the joke section for a reason; it's almost as funny as WTS beliefs.
Things You Have to Believe to Be a Republican Today:
by darkuncle29 17 Replies latest social humour
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darkuncle29
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Doubtfully Yours
Darkuncle29,
In spite of your long list, my vote would be Republican. Bill Clinton and his party were no better.
DY
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Satanus
Despite all the voting going on, the govt keeps getting in.
SS
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Satans little helper
roflmao Thats why we in the UK laugh at you guys so much. You voted for Bush!!!
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Englishman
Hilarious!
It also means that Tony Blairs "New Labour" Party is virtually republican too.
Scary.
Englishman.
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Winston Smith :>D
Despite all the voting going on, the govt keeps getting in.
SS
In my limited exposure to politics as of just getting out, I wonder how much good the two party system really does us. It seems candidates are influenced too heavily by party line rather than just using the ever elusive common sense and doing the right thing for people
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Phantom Stranger
The two-party system is definitely a drag on actual progress. It emphasizes the American tendency to oversimplify, to see things in black-and-white, and to play a zero-sum game.
That's not how reality works.
It also places stresses on candidates to align thelmselves out of their personal belief systems in order to fit into the two-party dichotomy.
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ThiChi
I see, what about Kerry?s Heinz connection? They have outsourced 60% of US jobs...Still feel good about the Dems now?
Greenspan: Protectionism No Answer to Job Loss
Thursday, March 11, 2004
WASHINGTON ? Federal Reserve ( search ) Chairman Alan Greenspan ( search ) Thursday urged Americans not to turn high anxiety about U.S. job losses into support for protectionist trade measures, which could hurt rather than help the situation.
In prepared remarks to the House Education Committee ( search ), the Fed chief waded into a burgeoning political argument with a strong call for an open trade environment that appeared to echo President Bush's sentiments.
"As history clearly shows, our economy is best served by full and vigorous engagement in the global econist measures" were being proposed, without specifying what he was referring to, and said they could be self-defeating.
"These alleged cures could make make matters worse rather than better," he said. "They would do little to create jobs and if foreigners were to retaliate, we would surely lose jobs."
In the runup to November's presidential elections, Democrats have sought to tag the Bush administration with the blame for a jobless recovery, saying that "outsourcing" of U.S. jobs to cheap-labor countries like India and China could and should be slowed.
Sen. John Kerry, who has the Democratic presidential nomination virtually locked up, sought union workers' support on Wednesday by saying Bush tax cuts helped the rich while doing nothing to protect middle-class jobs.
"Everywhere I've been in this campaign, I've met working Americans who are getting the short end of the stick," Kerry said before the AFL-CIO labor federation in Chicago. "Jobs on the run. Wages and salaries dead in the water."
Kerry has also blistered corporate chieftains who shift jobs out of America, referring to "Benedict Arnold CEOs" who lack loyalty to their employees.
In his remarks, Greenspan said job insecurity was "understandably significant" when nearly 2 million Americans have been on the unemployment lines for more than six months.
"New job creation is lagging badly -- the ironic consequence of accelerated gains in productivity," Greenspan said. "In all likelihood, employment will begin to increase more quickly before long as output continues to expand."
He said putting up barriers to foreign trade and guarding jobs might work in the short run but not indefinitely.
"Our standard of living would soon begin to stagnate and perhaps even decline as a consequence," Greenspan suggested.
He said it would be more fruitful to consider reforms in the education system to ensure that workers with needed skills in technology are available. That would have the coincidental benefit of easing some of the pressure that has driven wages of highly skilled employees up while pay for less-skilled workers has been virtually stagnant.
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Phantom Stranger
Gosh, that looks pretty humourous...
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darkuncle29
Hi guys.
FWIW, I do not think the Dems are much better. I think the binary political setup in this country is stupid. It would be funny if our futures weren't at the mercy of these morons.
There's the kicker, I do not believe they are actually fools. I think the dynamic of the setup is parasitic.
I'm using a public system and have to go.
