Have you been to Church since leaving JW for someone eles?

by LyinEyes 19 Replies latest jw friends

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  LyinEyes

  This is just a question I am wondering about , since my daughter age 10, has asked me to take her to church. We have been out of the JW's for 2 yrs and she hated the meetings , we spent most of the time , outside in the car, in the bathroom or home the last years we were JW's.

  She has alot of little friends who go to a little group on Tuesdays to learn about Jesus and do things likes arts and crafts.

  Well, the ladies at the First Baptist church invited her to go to Sunday school for her age group. I said no way are you going to a church without me to see what they are talking about. So I let it go at that for awhile.

  Now with Easter coming up and all, I am sure she will ask again. I am curious myself , but also terrifed at the same time.

  I think I will take her , but she will sit with me , durning the regular church services, and I will just see how it goes before I say it's a go for sunday school.

  I don't want to deny her , her spiritual side, I dont want to implant ideas in her head at all. It is all her choice and that is the way I want my children raised.

  My oldest son goes to church at times because his girlfriend hounds him about it and he said it is nothing like the KH, it is a youth group and they play games etc. But he told her it does not make him a believer as she is and she will never understand fully what being a JW did to him, that is why he is so leary.

  I was just wondering if any of you went to church with a friend , relative because they really wanted you to. They felt it was something they needed, and did you do it for them, even thou you had reservations?

  What church did you go to?

  If I find church to be an interesting experience I am going to hit them all in my little town, lol. I will probably be the only white person in the one church but I have always wanted to experience it all.

  I am a little stand off about the pentocost church because of their rules,,as I have a friend who told me all about the one here in town. I might get the frights from things she told me.......but ya know I can leave ,,,,,,,,I am not tied down, I have freedom now.

  I do want my kids to feel that way,,,,,,,,try new things, learn about different forms of spirituality and religions. So I will keep ya posted on when I do this and how it turns out.
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  happehanna

  Yes! I have been going to cathedrals around england and listening to evensong.

  When I first went in I felt so guilty but my boyfriend really wanted me to so I did. I found it really interesting, bearing in mind that cathedrals are normally located in great cities so I get to have a good time too!

  From a spirtual aspect I have found they singing glorious and there is sincerity present too.

  I thought if I am going to go to church I might as well go to the most splendid ones!
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  blondie

  I have attended to hear a musical program. I have visited another non-JW congregation as well as a private Bible study group. I enjoyed all three. No one felt you had to adopt their beliefs 100% to be there and were friendly and welcoming. But I think it is important to re-examine your beliefs in light of the Bible alone not adopting another group's interpretations or you might find yourself in the same boat as you were with the WTS.

  Blondie
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  Undecided

  I have gone to a church or two. I liked the pastor, he seemed an honest man and tried to help the ones that needed help. I didn't believe the doctrines and observed that it was more of a social group than a spiritual one. There were some who liked to control the church and it caused it to break up. The churches seem to me to be just a place to go to be with other people who like religion. There are so many different ones to suit the cultural situation of the ones there.

  I think Rutherford had it right, religion is a snare and a racket.

  Ken P.
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  LittleToe

  I've been to a wide range of denominations, and make it a habit to go and experience other styles of worship wherever I travel. The wildest one was a more Charismatic "Healing" event, where a friend of mine was cured of Spondilitus of the neck.

  I've had others request to come along with me (as I'm bold enough to go alone, but it seems that others aren't always that way inclined), and that's fine, too. At the end of the day, I'm there to worship alone, in the midst of a body of reasonably likeminded individuals.

  If I manage to get to Dallas, in May (which is looking more and more promising), I hope to try out something on the Sunday.
  Last time I pressed Megadude into taking me to one of the large churches that I'd heard you had Stateside. It was especially gratifying when the Sermon was on exactly the subjects that we'd been talking about that very afternoon.
  Gotta love synchronicity!!!

  Edited to add:
  I was asked to do a reading at my Best Man's wedding (we had been Best man, for each other, and parted when he was DF'ed. This was his remarriage, during the Summer after we'd been reunited and I had left the JW's).

  I was also asked to go to the Baptism of some exJW Christian friends, and at a later date at his mothers Funeral, where I was asked to say a few words by way of eulogy (They occasionally post here as DaLuvvinBruvva and DaLuvvinSista).

  These three occasions were in churches
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  Special K

  Hi lyineyes.

  I have been to church two or three times since exiting the org.

  2 funeral services.

  1 sort of confirmation thing for my baby cousin. Baptist. My cousin and her husband invited us to the baptism of their first child. All of my family of 5 attended. It was interesting and it was done out of love for my cousin. It is what they believe in and I respect that. They were very moved that we came knowing all the problems we have had with Jehovah's Witnesses.

  I took a total non-judgemental approach to the whole thing and my psyhe was fine with the whole thing.

  My kids however, .. found the whole thing boring.

  sincerely

  Special K

  ps. the weird thing was that my cousin asked my husband and I to be godparents for their new baby and all of us were just thrilled. Two months later they told us that their minister told them that their baptist teachings don't believe in that sort of thing so that we couldn't be the godparents. That hurt.

  There are man made rule's in each religion that seem to take the love out of things..

  sk
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  desib77

  My husband and I attended a baptist church with his cousin. I was terrified! The very first thing I noticed was in one of the songs that they were displaying on the screen it said Jehovah....That was shocking to me. My mother had always told me that the churches didn't ever use that name.

  Other than that it went okay until the pastor got really carried away. I felt like he was a phony and was just trying to get people pumped up right before he asked for a pledge.

  All together it wasn't too bad but I don't think that I will ever be Baptist.

  Desi
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  Carmel

  Eyes, I spent three years after leaving the Borg going to various Xtian churches "seeking". After I married my wife wanted occassionally to go to church. We went to the Methodist church, Prepryterian (sp?) Catholic, Assembly of God, Luthren, on and on..We pretty much agreed that neither the Christian Scientists that my wifes family attended nor the JW which was my families fix were for us. So we basically stopped going for nearly fifteen years. We never felt a need to have a church in our lives to impart spiritual values. I have to admit that being agnostic did not provide a consistant moral foundation. Both my wife and I came with that but it was not based on a particular philosophy, just early childhood training. We never found a religion that we could embrace, it found us///

  carmel
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  Mary

  I went to a Baptist Church several weeks ago, just to try it out. They were very friendly and they had a little skit for the kids, but I found it kind of boring. They have a schedule that they hand out to everyone, the minister speaks for about 10 minutes, and then you sing a song from their hymn book. This is repeated several times throughout the service. They actually passed around the bread and wine to everyone. Yes I partook (waiting for lightning to strike me), but I noticed right away that they used levened bread which I thought strange, as that defeats the whole purpose.

  The people were very nice, but I guess after all the years as a Dub, I expect more substance in a Sunday talk. The people were very nice and friendly, but I don't think I'd go back...........it just wasn't my cup of tea.
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  franklin J

  Hi lyin eyes,

  I married a nice Irish Catholic girl. She knew my JW background when we were courting, and was prepared to accept me ; knowing I was not Catholic and did not belong to any religion. When discussing how we would raise our children; her response was reasonable and intelligent :

  "since you have no religion; and do not believe anything religiously; and I do have a religion and believe it; why shouldn't we raise the children as Catholic?"; it made sense to me.

  If if gave my wife peace of mind to baptize them as infants into Catholicism; it was ok with me.

  We were also married in a vey nice Catholic ceremony ( short and sweet) in a church.

  I attend the Family Mass services with the wife and kids; it is a very nice community of people. It is not the pomp and ceremony typically associated with the Catholic Church. It is held in the large community room of the Church . If you want the pomp and ceremony ( choir; organ) you go to the main nave of the Church for services. The Family Mass is ALL families ( in various stages of making noise). All the families are very friendly. There is coffee and cake served afterwards to help socialize. There are all kinds of support groups. Everyone sits in folding chairs arranged in a semi circle; no pews. I attend to show familiy unity to the children; spiritually it means nothing to me.

  They all know that I am not Catholic; and no one cares. They are all livid over the Churches issues concerning pedophilia. But like my wife; they all tend to be balanced in their beliefs; unlike the JWs. The kids do not cross themselves or kneel. It is all accepted; and that works fine for me. The children have some basis for a religion; far more balance than me growing up as a JW. They are being taught "tolerance" for all faiths ( my direct intervention) and I have taken them to other churches ( Lutheran; Jewish Temples) to see the difference in worship. So far; it works!