First Post

by Purza 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • kibizzle
    kibizzle

    Welcome! You came to the right place. Everyone here is wonderful. Sorry to hear about all the pain you've been through, I'm glad you have a supportive partner. I agree with you that I could never diss the jw's either, my dear h is one. My beef is with the borg! Kibi

  • Atilla
    Atilla

    Welcome, have fun and good luck with college but be careful. You could become so hooked that you spend more time here than working on your studies. I know that has happened to me many days, and I end up cramming just to get my homework done.

    If you can't change how your parents and friends feel about you, try not to worry and rather focus your energy on yourself. Feel good about yourself and live your life to the fullest, that is the best defense. Once your family sees that your happy and sucessful, they may just come around.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    Welcome Purza

    I think it's great that you are facing your fears by going to a counselor and coming here. You may well be surprised by how quickly you can get over your fears once you faced them dead on!

    One day you're afraid that the latest terrorist bombing is the start of Armageddon, and the next day you find yourself thinking "damn! (or worse ), that's just what happens when x(group) gets crossways with y(group), it's been happening more or less since before Eve was the apple of Adam's mythological eye. I think I'll go start that martial arts class to relieve the stress of worrying about it".

  • 4JWY
    4JWY

    Welcome Purza!

    I'm relatively new to this forum also, and I am so happy that you have taken the initiative to find it! It has proven to be very beneficial to my family and I to find a group of people who have shared a like life experience. We used to think it was "just us" that had these thoughts and feelings - when you get here, you see that it is universal among the cult of JW's.

    I can't recommend enough that you read the book, "WHEN GOD BECOMES A DRUG", by Leo Booth.

    This is the first book my husband and I read upon making our break after 43 years and it deals with the guilt, fear, and shame that so many of us have lived with as JW's. It discusses the different stages of religious addiction and how religion creates dysfunction, yet how we can work through the issues to attain a healthy spirituality, that may not have anything to do with following any religious belief. While opening your mind to all sorts of works, yes, books, and researching topics of interest, & sharing thoughts with others, you will find a whole new world opening up to you. Enjoy the journey and we look forward to getting to know you better.

    4JWY and family

  • Maverick
    Maverick

    Welcome Purza! What is there to fear? Who are these guys that you should run and hide from them. They are nothing but misguided, misinformed, under-educated book peddlers! All their facts come from the WTS! How sad is that? They're a very sad bunch and you should replace the fear you feel of them with pity for them! Maverick

  • seeitallclearlynow
    seeitallclearlynow

    Hi there Purza! Welcome to this forum - you will get a lot of help here.

    I wanted to walk away and get on with my life. But, my father doesn't speak to me and my brother turned me in to the elders. I ran away and hid. I moved about an hour away from where I was raised. I live in fear that I will run in to one of my old "friends" and they will "catch" me. Sometimes I feel like I am going insane because of this fear. I start counseling on Tuesday, and I hope I will be strong enough to prevail.

    Now I ask you, what "Christian" or "loving" religion would bring about this kind of action and feelings?

    None. You are experiencing what it's like to try to leave a cult. Plain and simple. And you will be strong enough to prevail, because you now have the resources you need to succeed.

  • pc
    pc

    Welcome Purza! We all know the beginning lurking and can't move away from the screen syndrome. Make sure you do your homework!! Anyway this is a fantastic place. Everyone has a different opinon and that's fine. You should first be proud of yourself for taking care of your child. Meeting the love of your life is wonderful, take advantage that he is not a JW. People outside can help you see how brainwashed we all are. Getting counseling will be huge for you. Realize you'll go through alot of up and downs because you will no longer feel guilty but so betrayed. That too will pass. Enjoy your day and here's to enjoying everyone for the rest of your life!! PC

  • calamityjane
    calamityjane

    Welcome to the board Purza.

    cj

  • Stefanie
    Stefanie

    Welcome to the board!

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    Hello Purza, welcome!

    I live in fear that I will run in to one of my old "friends" and they will "catch" me.

    I know exacly what that's like. I was like that for a long time after I left. I was always afraid that a JW would "catch" me with one of my worldly girlfriends and think, "he must have committed fornication by now". I agree that it's a horrible fear to have, but it does go away in time. I had to wake up and realize that these people who were judging me no longer had any impact on my life. They weren't going to write to the local paper making an announcement that "Nosferatu had committed fornication". There were periods of time where I would run into a JW, and would feel ashamed for the way I look (I grew my hair long). It no longer has an effect on me. I love my long hair!

    The thing is, you've been judged on your actions and your appearance all your life. It won't go away overnight. Old habits (and thoughts) die slow, but they do die. A little bit of help from a counsellor (or a support group) may help them die faster.

    I wish you the best of luck on your recovery.

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