My world is crashing down on all sides around me. Do you know that feeling where you look around and panic just grabs you by the throat. Nothing seems to make sense anymore, nothing gives you happiness. I can?t even remember the last time I was actually happy. I mean really, unfeigned happiness, where there wasn?t a little voice in the back of my mind telling me it is all fake or where there weren?t dark clouds of doom just glooming on the edge of my vision.
Do you remember being a little kid, your problems seemed so huge. The thoughts occupying our minds, the things we worried about ? things like speaking in front of your peers, or a schoolmate picking on your shoes.
But no matter how big the troubles we faces were ? we could find sanctuary at home. Or at least, we all should have had that feeling. I know I did, I could run to mummy and she would make it all better. And I?d get instant result often too. Things were handled for me, and in an organised way. My mummy could fix the world if I had asked her ? or so I was sure.
I wish I was happy again. I know I have been, I just can?t see to get that feeling back.
*sigh*
