Marrying a non-believer? (page 2)

XQsThaiPoes

It works fine if both people are not "religious" and like to um BS. The problem is the those types of realtionships tend to have more serious problems that have little to do with the relatively inert theological issues.

Lady Lee

If she does remain a JW and you never convert (or even if you did to keep the peace) expect that the elders will be informed of many of the goings-on in your marriage. Expect the elders to want to "talk" to you to explain how wrong your beliefs are

Expect that while you are dating if you have sex or even if you do sexual things but stop before ever actually having sex (touching etc) she may feel guilty enough to go to the elders and tell them all the details of your relationship and expect that she will be disciplined (which can include a range of people avoiding her.

If you do marry and she remains a JW expect that she will always be treated as second class for going outside the religion.

This is more than just a religion. They seek to interfere in every facet of your life including what goes on in the bedroom and the rest of the house. Any problems you have she will go to the elders to discuss how to deal with it. Family counseling is pretty much out of the question. JWs believe the elders (who are untrained to give any kind of counseling) have God's spirit and must be reported to and obeyed.

My mother married a non-JW. Life was hell for him. Expect no holiday celebrations. No birthdays, no Christmas in your home. She will object to celebrating these things with any children you have.

And JWs are taught that God's law (to obey the elders and the Watchtower teachings) are greater and far more important than any vow she would make to you.

Good luck. You're going to need it. And that is about as fair as I can be.

run dont walk

If you were buying a new car, would you not test drive it, and check out the car thoroughly, and make sure its what you want.

If you were buying a house, would you not have it checked out, roofing, foundation, furnace etc.

Well, why any different, if someone is a part of something that is "big" in their life, should you not check it out thoroughly, before making a decision.

You will be very sorry,

Run dont Walk (away from the Watchtower)

RUN RUN RUN

stillajwexelder

Your sexual relationship will not be normal either -- if you want clarification, please post and I am sure we on this board will explain

4JWY

My husband would say," been there, done that"

. Fortunately, for us it worked out, but we would NEVER recommend it to anyone, unless you are game for conversion and realize the extent to which you would then become a different person - you are required to put on a NEW PERSONALITY, and you may find it doesn't really suit you eventually..

Although if she has dated you, and is even considering marrying an unbeliever - there is an outside chance that she doesn't put her full trust in the organization that she is a part of. The religion is a "WAY OF LIFE" , not just a go to church on Xmas and Easter deal - I would fully discuss this matter and see where she stands NOW, not later.

Best to you,

4JWY

Sassy

aaahh yes.. the no no's she will be expected to abide by..... let me start.. others can add...

No oral sex

No Rated R movies

iiz2cool

I was a JW for 20 years, and I married a poor pioneer? sister who had nothing. Throughout our marriage she treated my worldly? family like crap. She never worked full time, and whenever things got tight my worldly? father bailed us out, and even then she refused to ever visit him with me for even 5 minutes. There are often sexual issues with JW's as well, as there were in my marriage. She said it was because she was a child abuse victim. It was not until after I disassociated myself that she told me that she initiated many of the incestuous encounters she had with her brothers. Last year I decided to disassociate myself from the cult because of their child abuse scandals. My wife said she understood why I wanted to leave but asked me to wait until after my mother, who is also an elderly JW with cancer, passed away. I decided to DA anyway, because I had a feeling she just wanted me around so she could get her hands on my mother's money that I'd inheirit, and then leave me. She was afraid my mom would cut me out of the will. Our marriage fell apart in December, and since then she's been trying to bleed me dry, even making claims against my Father's estate. She's also convinced that she's entitled to half of what I may inheirit from my mom once she's gone, even though the will specificly excludes spouses. I wouldn't trust any JW as far as I can spit when it comes to money. In spite of their claims of honesty, I found them to be the most dishonest, deceitful, and manipulative people I've ever known.

If you marry a JW, this is what you can look forward to:

Boring (if any) sex.

Constantly being bombarded with JW propaganda. They DO NOT know when to shut up!

Pressure to become a JW. If you become one, there's more pressure on you. If you don't become one you'll be an outsider looking in, never accepted by them as being an equal human being. Your wife could be ostracized.

If you join, pressure to work less while donating more money to the congregation. Pressure to become more and more active in the congregation until you're "living no longer for yourself". You'll lose your identity, and you and your wife may soon become strangers to each other, having nothing but the cult in common.

All of this, just to live a lie and to teach lies.

I could go on for days, but I'll stop here. I'm going on a rant.

Walter

4JWY

Sparky - BTW-

.....after 25 yrs. and surviving that "mixed marriage" which did include conversion of hubby,

we are BOTH UP AND RUNNING at this moment along with our kids!

Marrying a non-believer?

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