I was thinking back the other day to new years eve 1999. It was a few hours before midnight. I was in the Virgin Islands drinking with my girlfriend and some friends and I started to freak out. I started thinking that maybe christ would return that night, maybe armageddon would come and the earth would be turned inside out and I would die that very night. The fear that my parents and the witnesses had ingrained into me started to take over. I started to doubt my decision, had I made the right choice to leave and live life on my own terms? Then I started to think - wait what time zone does christ abide by? Midnight on the planet and new years is constantly moving since the earth rotates. Did I already miss armageddon, was europe in ruins while I was sailing and drinking and having the time of my life? Maybe destruction was sweeping across the earth from one time zone to the next. How long would it take? Was this how it ends!?!
Midnight past and the sky lit up, explosions were heard echoing across the water for miles around and fire rained down all around us. It was the best fireworks show I had ever seen. Afterwords all I said was, - 'Hey - the world didn't end.' and laughed.
I knew that technically the millenium didn't end until new years eve 2000, so I went through a bit of the same thing on that day as well. The witness logic took over again with the idea that since so many where expecting christs return in 1999, he would return on 2000 since he would come in an unexpected hour or whatever revelation says.
Same thing happened the morning of 9/11 when I woke up, turned on my TV and watched it all go down. I started thinking again, is this the end?
After each time though I came to the same conclusion, even if the world does end and I end up dead forever while others I know live forever in a paradise earth (yeah right), I was happy with the decisions I had made, and happier for making them. Happy to no longer endure the organizations psychological terror and their bullshit fear-inspiring propoganda. Happy to be able to make up my own mind about personel and adult decisions and not have someone else make up my mind for me. Happy to be free.
Although I thought the witnesses where full of crap I was still, at times, filled with doubt and fear. Anyone else relate to this?