by Max Divergent 42 Replies latest jw friends
I follow Blondie's lead and underline all the bigoted, inflammatory, manipulative language. If I severely disagree with a paragraph, I write large with my highlighter over top what I really think. I make notes in the margin of where I might research, track down a source, or follow up on some fuzzy logic.
Highlight me geek!
You know...I dont think I have ever completed an entire Watchtower before the meeting except maybe 4 times in 16 years. I remember the first time I grabbed a highlighter and started drawing lines through sentences while my husband was driving to the meeting. We were laughing the whole way. It was a shame that we felt like we were being judged by others to the point of making it look as though we studied. We were serving man and not Jehovah at this point. But there is a lot of pressure when you open your magazine and you see people looking over your shoulder. I suspected they were making assuptions that I do not appreciate my spiritual food as much as THEY do. Maybe it was my imagination but when I confided this to some other sisters they too admitted that they had also done this. Well, no pioneer sister would ever admit this and 9 times out of 10 these are the ones that are looking over your shoulder.
Anyway, there is a lot of pressure and judgement within the congregations. The fact that many of us were doing this shows that the pressure is there and exists. I dont think it is completely our imaginzation or paranoia.
But truth is this judging attitude is not what is suppose to be going on. There are many scriptures telling us to mind our own business. Do you think people in Christendom act like this? I found Christendom to be more forgiving then our own, although at this point in my life I am very turned off by organized religion all together.
My last few Watchtower studies I started drawing pictures and faces, bugs walking around the pages. I had some multicolored rubber stamps that I pressed on much of the white space of the pages. Mustaches and big Poofy hair also made them characters more interesting. I did this in complete rebellion to those who look over my shoulder. I could tell they were looking because I would put my WT in a way that they breifly saw it and then put it partialy of out of sight. They would stretch their necks to see what I was reading. Just call me craazy.
Growing up I always wondered why my dad got pissed off when he saw me using parentheses instead of underlining answeres. I prefered using parentheses because it took a fraction of the time to put them in place than what it took to underline... especially when the answer was half a paragraph or more.
Now I understand why he hated this, its because people who look across the hall at other people's WTs cannot see parentheses, but they can see underlines.
during my entire 10 years as a BORG collective member, I never studied the WT once... I read the books and found nothing drasticly changed that a quick read could not tell me.... It suprized me to see how many struggled with understanding what seemed so simplistic.
I quickly realized that those like me had two possible futures....be honest about our intellect and disturb the sheep and be driven out because of being apostates even if we were not...or play stupid and use our intellect to edge into higher offices like MS, Elder, etc...
my family seems to suffer from a lack of dishonesty genes or something, I really detest dishonesty and I only lie when its absolutely convenient (^_^)
btw, nothing taught me how to lie better than being married to a JW gal.
For the last year I went I never could find the right WT
I knew a WT study conductor like that, Rekless.
Blondie
I knew a WT study conductor like that, Rekless.
lol... I was the WT reader... and I kept forgetting to bring my WT.
Unfortunately, I had to really study it and underline, as my mother would double check when I was done. I bet the highlighting pen companies would be out of business if it were not for Dubs.
Zen:
It suprized me to see how many struggled with understanding what seemed so simplistic.
Like the understanding of 607 BCE?
Rainbow-spectrum-highlighter and margin-scripture-writer checking in. Never randomly, however it was tempting at times. Remember the counsel when people started to print the scriptures off of the CD Rom instead of looking them up?
The fact that many of us were doing this shows that the pressure is there and exists. I dont think it is completely our imaginzation or paranoia.
I agree. I remember how small I felt a few times opening a "naked" study article, imagining the measuring of my spirituality going on behind me.
On the phone recently with my active JW mom she wrapped up our conversation: "Well I have to get to studying my Watchtower." I know that she couldn't fathom *not* having to do that during her week of theocratic activity.
Amazing to realize these things at a distance, eh?
My last few Watchtower studies I started drawing ... bugs walking around the pages.
LOL,
alias
We had to study when i was a kid, because a couple other families would come during the week and we would all prepare together. We all lived outside of town, and we were supposed to be upbuilding each other. It was like a second book study, except we all had to take turns reading paragraphs. It was usually at our house, since my mom had so many kids it was easier for the others to come to us. I hated it. My step-father was playing at being a jw then, and would get on us if we couldn't read the paragraphs outloud properly. this went on for a few years, until the brothers became elders and ms, and my step-father let his true abusive nature show through. After that we only studied when my mom was on a zealous kick. After I had my oldest son, I would study off and on, but I wouldn't make him sit though the whole thing. I hated raising him jw, and I was glad when I finally gave it up, and he could be normal, but he was already 11 by that time. Later he told me it was all so stupid, he never paid attention. He has always been alot smarter than me. Now I too don't care much for organized religion. but I do like some of the music, so much better than the crap we used to have to sing.
I also used to draw in the margins during the meeting, make it look like I was taking notes or something. My favorite thing was to draw lines between the words down the page and see how curvey the line could get, then I would draw it back up the page to see if I could keep them from crossing. Doesn't take much to keep me entertained. I would also write comments about the person who was answering the question, like she is so stupid, what a bitch, I hope he gets his hand shut in a car door. Stuff like that.
Always waiting for the meeting to get over so I could have Sunday fried chicken at my great-grandma's house. It was the only thing to look forward too on Sunday.
Pam
