If you had the choice ,when you became a jw,,,,,,, (page 2)

glitter

I think people who are recruited are recruited for a reason - disappointed with mainstream religion etc, or otherwise vulnerable. So they might actually find it harder to wake up than people who as kids missed out on all the fun stuff kids should get to do. Also people recruited as adults might not have been there during several flip-flops like people raised in it, so they won't see the cracks - new converts don't know how it used to be before they joined.

I was a toddler when my mum joined them - too young to know better.

Undaunted Danny

The short answer is adult.I was born in the ' troof' 1957 when the GB were very entrenched power barons.There was little info on brain washing except references to UN peace keeping POW's "brainwashed" by red Chinese interrogators.Cult mind control was poorly understood. Even as late as 1992 there was little support available for cult survivors.Steve Hassan was just getting ramped up.Now help is only a mouse click away. Remember The 8 marks of a mind control cult:Eight Marks of a deadly Mind Control Cult applied to Jehovah's Witnesses They are all the same mates. Steve Hassan sez: they exploit weaknesses and situational variables and vulnerabilities
I almost died trying to escape.When the WT$ says,"they don't hold you hostage" that is a lie!

kls

Being recruited as an adult is your own fault , so is there more guilt?

Mulan

If I had been recruited as an adult, it would have only been an attempt at recruitment. I know myself and I would never have swallowed it.

My father used to tell me it was a good thing I was raised in it because I would "argue with a buzz saw". My mother gave up trying to study the Bible with me, because I argued with her about "why this" and "why that". She had no answers for me so just quit. I was about 12, so stayed in.

barbar

This is very difficult to answer because none of us can anser authoritively from both sides.

But I was bought up as a JW from a very young age,neverknew anything else. My brother always thought that he missed out on birthdays etc, I never did. I tried to be a good JW but when I left it took me along time to come to terms with much of it. I believe that mentally and emotionally we have missed out on so much that we are affected for life.

Why do we all post on this site? Is it not therapy? Are we not all affected and seeking comfort from others who have suffered in the same way, whether we were born into it or came in as adults.

DanTheMan

I'm glad I wasn't raised in it and I'm glad my family aren't Joe Wits. Instead of leaving the religion and losing my family, in some ways it was the opposite. Not that I ever cut off contact with them, but I always felt guilty for being close with my worldly(TM) family, especially my sister, much closer than I ever was with the folks at the KH, and that guilt was always a wedge that kept me from being able to love them completely. It was these sort of conflicting emotions that made my life as a JW unbearable.

...I love my sister/she's gonna die at Armageddon/well maybe she won't/I don't know/do I really believe this stuff/they make it sound so logical/why do I feel like something isn't quite right here/I should study and pray more/I wouldn't even want sis to come to the KH, I would be embarrassed, she'd see right through this and ask me what kind of crazy religion am I associating with...

My head spun like this constantly for 10 damn years.

JW's hardly have the market cornered on crappy childhoods though.

zugzwang

I was born into the borg so I would have to say that I would rather have learned about it as an adult. It just feels like I have lived at 27 year sentence in a prison. The crime was apparently being born to the wrong family who believed some screwed up things. I can't imagine it being more difficult for a person who finds "the truth" than it is for a person who is found by "the truth" at birth. Learning about something as an adult and making a decision about it is far better than being taught something from birth. I guess it's kind of like learning a new language. If at birth you are taught english and that is the only language you know and then you have to learn chinese, it will be much more difficult for a person who has never spoken any other language. Whereas a person who spoke chinese a long time ago could learn it again much easier. So I would definitely prefer to have learned about the Borg as an adult. So I could get back 27 years of my life.

zugz

cyber-sista

I am glad I was not born into it. I already had a group of friends and had other things going on in my life. I came into the Org into a congo with a lot of people my age and a lot more liberal than the last one I attended. I had just had a child and I was suffering from post partum depression and low self esteem. I was in pain and easily lead (I didn't want my baby to die at Armegeddon did I?) I was programmed with fear and at the same time love bombed and given a sense of protection.

But I never totally gave myself up. I was married to an unbeliever and lead a double life with a whole set of non-JW friends and family.

When I finally became spiritually saturated (fed up) with everything I had seen and experienced I flipped out and then separated myself from the Org. I was in for over 20 years and there has been a lot of damage done with the spiritual programming and all, but I think it would be harder to leave if that is all you have ever known and lived. JW parents do their children an injustice by not giving them their freedom of choice. Afterall they claim that God extends this freedom of choice to all mankind...the Org lies...

zen nudist

I was not an aDULT when JWs first infected me, but even at age 15 I really had no great desire to join a new religion, but I felt compelled to check it out because if it happened to be THE TRUTH, I would not avoid it.... I went to the library and got anti-JW books from catholics and protestants [circa 1976] but there was no such thing as cult awareness at the time...

the books were disappointing in that they could not give valid reasons why anyone should not be a JW other than WE were here first and they are muscling in on our territory.... their arguements were lame, their dogmatic demand that they are right because they have been around longer was silly... they had nothing to desuade me from JWs who SEEMED to have a much more logical grasp on the bible then they ever had.

so without anyone to give me anything more than their own claims to truth, I became a JW....

I think it would have been far more difficult for me had I been born into it as I would have very little to compare JWs to which helped me finally get away from them without too much psychic damage (^_^)

Freedom Fighter

I agree with a lot of what has been said so far - I was brought up in the 'truth' and have to say that it spoiled a big part of my childhood. The humiliation of always being the 'different' kid, having to lie about birthdays and xmas amongst other things. The embarrassment of being seen going to the KH or on field service caused me problems with some people at school. I also resented having to attend boring meetings which took up so much time during the week - especially on Summer nights when I would rather have been somewhere else.

Luckily I had a lot of worldly friends and relatives so I always kept a foot in both camps. What angers me still is the fact that I had no real choice in the matter - I would rather have had made choices as an informed adult. I only went to keep my mum happy and also because of the armageddon fears that came from the platform every week.

Even now, 17 years on since I sat in the KH for the last time, it upsets me to think about it. The pain is still there, buried in my psyche for evermore. I have often asked myself how anyone could put a child through that - I have asked my mum this, and her reply is that as far as she is concerned it was for my own good, an Armageddon protection shield. I don't blame her - she has been duped like so many others. I am also glad she didn't make a big deal of it when I went my own way, that made things so much easier.

I don't have kids, but if I do I will make sure they don't suffer in this way - it does leave it's mark that's for sure.

If you had the choice ,when you became a jw,,,,,,,

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