Former Bethelite comes out and shares story

by Dogpatch 39 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Bubbamar

  Hi Michael

  I could relate so much to your story. I too was shy, had low self esteem and wanted approval. That led me to baptism at age 13 and was DF'ed at 18 because I was doing it all for the wrong reasons. It has been hard dealing with my mom's refusal to associate with me. But it would have been much harder and more costly to sell my soul to a cult. It has only been that last 2 months that I have read CofC and some other internet information and It was very disturbing for me to learn that everything I based my young life on and the loss of my mother - is all really for nothing but a pack of lies! I think I am still in a state of shock! I am so happy for you that you are in a happy relationship - so many of us end up alone for a while until we are able to build a "family of choice."

  Hang in there buddy!

  Randy - thanks for sharing this story. BTW - I love your writing!
• 

  doogie

  hey, i know what you're talking about simon. i never got used to the awed looks i would get from the "lowly rank and file" when i would go back to visit my folks. it was all i could do not to bust out laughing.

  i just wanted to smack em to knock that look off of their face. everyone's the same, it doesn't matter if you live in brooklyn or wallkill or wherever.
• 

  doogie

  But it would have been much harder and more costly to sell my soul to a cult.

  amen, bubba.
• 

  Undaunted Danny

  I am a quarter century older click my bio/profile.

  Danny shares and cares,bless you.Undaunted Danny, www.DannyHaszard.com been there
• 

  Gerard

  I decided I wanted to move to texas and pursue this relationship further. I prepared a letter so as to express myself as clearly as possible to my parents. I mailed it out the day I left tennessee and waited for the fireworks. within a couple of days the calls started. Rather than be happy and supportive of my decision, you’d think I had just announced a terminal illness.

  It is unbelievable that this religion is so ALIENATED to the concept of love.

  Hang in there. Family members rarely grew up in the same house.

  Gerry
• 

  RandomTask

  Well Michael, I have to respect your decision. A lot of us have faced varying degrees of what you have experienced. Know that your family still loves you, they demonstrate that by doing what they think is right. Unfortunately their love must be filtered through their WatchTower beliefs.

  It is because of people like you that I hope for the organization to collapse someday. Nobody should have to go through this with their family simply because of a difference in beliefs. This is the most evil and hurtful aspect of their idiology, their forceful breaking of families in order to coerce compliance and obedience. As you can see, their mind grip is so strong that even the so called "weak ones" and disfellowshipped among them shun you as being evil.

  I wish you well and hope that someday your family opens up, it has happened to others before. Just remember that you still have many friends here who have been through some of the same experiences and will not judge you on your beliefs (despite the political battles you may see raging off and on ) Welcome!
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  doogie

  what really hit me about this board and other so-called "apostate" sources is the love that is so evident.(you wouldn't believe how big a deal it was that i put quotations around that word in my DA letter... later when i talked to my little brother, he busted out his latin diaglot and "set me straight." i just said, "ok, that's cool...call me what you will...it doesn't change a thing"...they seem to feel otherwise. anyway...)

  the other day i saw a message from apparantly an active young JW who thought this site was something it's not. and i was so happy to see the love and concern that was shown her by those on the board at the time, letting her know that she may not have intended to end up here but she was more than welcome.

  "predators"? "wicked heart condition"? "evil"? i think not.
• 

  kls

  Welcome, you have found a place that is accepting you with open arm's. There is no shunning and so many have been hurt in so many way's from the org. Join us and we all will help in any way we can.
• 

  Winston Smith :>D

  Hey Doogie,

  Quite a story, glad you are getting out of the cult at an early age.

  It's a frightening and exciting experience to be sure for those first few months of having your eyes truly opened to the truth about the Troof.

  When I handed in my DA letter in Winter 2003, some people were heart broken from what my [still active JW] wife tells me. Some still come up to her at the Circuit Assemblies in Janesville literally crying and in tears about how much they miss me...

  But I don't feel one ounce of regret about handing in my DA letter. These friends of mine are more than free to talk to me anytime they wish, I'm not stopping them . I even sent 20 letters out to many of my 'friends' telling them that I cared for them and they are welcome to talk to me anytime they wish even though we may share different religious viewpoints. The door is always open and the ball is in their court. My life is moving on with or without them.

  BTW, if you ever need to get a ride or some company while in Madison; WI, let me know. I am in Milwaukee, and I owe someone a visit here on the board.

  Besides, Madison is a kick-ass city to hang out in!
• 

  doogie

  heck yeah, winston.

  you just don't know until you've visited madison. it's a great town. i love it. and the people are absolutely wonderful! (...ok, a little sarcasm there) i actually really miss the smell of those filthy, filthy lakes. it seems like every year the beaches are open fewer weekends.