by Brummie 44 Replies latest jw friends
(((((((((((Brummie))))))))))))
I know how you are feeling and I am truly sorry you are going through this. All I can say is it takes time and you probably won't ever totally get over it with two little bunchkins you will always have ties and feelings for their Mother.
Hang in there, I hope my favorite puddy-cat is back to puuuuurring soon.
Kate
(((((((((Brummie)))))))))) I'm sorry to hear this. It is a grieving process and you will have ups and downs. I'm glad you are determined to stay as close to your boys as you have been in the past.
For me and my ex it took a long time to be able to be on the same page. He was very bitter and until a couple of years ago things were very rocky between us. But when it came right down to it I could get through to him about our daughter and that was basically the only contact I had with him. Things are a lot different now- we can actually talk to one another and work together on some things.
Take care of yourself -things have a way of working out for the best.
XW
Sorry to hear about this Brummie. :(
((((((((((Brummie))))))))))
I am sorry to hear about your separation. It's gonna be tough for the next year or so--your moods will be high and then low and then high again. It is likely that you and your wife will continue to be friends for the sake of the children. I can't say how your wife will respond because I do not know her but I can't imagine you acting hostile towards the mother of your children.
It's gonna hurt sometimes and it could take a while to recover since you've been together for so long. Pay attention to your moods and do not be too proud to call on a physician to help you with any depression that may occur. You have my email addy. Use it when needed.
You're my friend, Brumm and I wish you all the best.
Much love,
Robyn
Dear Brummie:
I am so sorry to hear about your separation...I well know how "tough these times are"...
My first husband, of 19 years decided to leave me.....he was caught cheating...we were divorced 3 weeks before our 20th anniversary.
I was a "hopeless romantic"...he had started cheating on me before our 2nd anniversary...and cheated on and off and yes we were both active JW's and one of his cheatings was with one of my best friends in the truth(tm) at one time...
The separation was hell.....and the divorce was hell.....I will never ever trust him or speak amicabley with him...I raised his son from his first marriage...and we had one together.
But, I am better off without him...Although I thought I could never "love again" or felt worthy of being loved, cause I was never really loved by a cheating man...........I met someone 1.5 years after it was over and I found out what "real love" is suppose to be like.....(his name is NOdenial)
I always wondered why I had to go thru what I did......but it worked out for my "best"...Time is a healer....
Maybe there will be a "silver lining to your dark cloud"....I truly hope so....
Many hugs to ya...and know that I care...PM me if ya want!!!
Codeblue
Codeblue,
I was married to my kids dad and divorced him two weeks before our 20th anniversary. All our friends had already planned a huge party, I could not allow that to happen. I was the one they didn't like cuz I spoiled their party. I cancelled it. And filed divorce.
Brummie, If there is no cheating. What the heck is wrong with you guys? Your kids are young, why can't you stick it out? Can you rekindle the flame you had. Maybe get off the internet? You are a sweetheart and have always been there and nice to me. But my god, you have two young sons! If you ever want to talk PM me. I have alot to say.
Love you lots Brummie.
Wow Brummie,
Sorry to hear you are going through this. (( HUGS)) I cannot say I have been there b/c I haven't. But, I know the stress marriages can suffer. Hubby and I, have come close a few times. But were able to work it out and deal with it. We have had our fights~ but we have at least had it out in the open.
X.
Sorry you are going through this pain, Brummie. It's hard, I know. Take extra good care for yourself for a while.....
-LisaBobeesa
Thanks to all of you for being so supportive, you are all friends that I value and respect a lot. All thoughts have been helpful so thanks for sharing, i'll get back to this thread when I feel a little more able. I'm feelin a lot better today so perhaps its best for me not to focus on this seperation until I am nearer to my moving out day, in saying that its been great to get some feedback and support.
(((group)))
Brummie
Brummie, sorry to hear about your situation buddy.
Can't say I've ever experienced anything like it myself, being the relationship-challenged person that I am. But I've seen a lot of it with my family and I know how rough it is. Chin up mate.
