by 1914 15 Replies latest jw friends
What is everyone so afraid of?
I happen to be one of those individuals who values family and friends. I am not afraid of being disfellowshipped, but the harsh reality is that once I would cut myself off I would also cut myself off parents and friends.
I love my family very much and so I endure for THEM.
So its not a matter of being afraid its a matter of calculating ALL costs.
wannaexit
I can say that agree from the viewpoint that it was such a relief to have them off my back. No more pressure to pioneer, guilt trips for wanting to go to college and have a career, buying a 2 door car, dating......you guys know the list. I got to celebrate my 19th birthday, christmas, go trick-or-treating (had to find some kids so I could "take them" haha) etc.
Has all that freedom made up for losing my mom? That's a tough call. If I had to do it over again I would fade.
I'm happy to hear of at least 1 DF'ed JW who did not have to experience any painful repercusions.
I
think what ?1914? means is that if someone is in a position to be able to DA him/herself or get him/herself DF?d without being unmanageably affected by repercussions of the separation from family and friends, then, yeah, he/she might as well just get it done.
I would never DA myself. That is just playing by their rules.If they wanted to DF me so be it but I would not bother to go to their kangaroo court to try to defend myself.You are only free from this cult when you can walk away and laugh at them as they try to control your life..The problem will always be if you have family or close friends that are controled by this EVIL CULT. This is where each person have to weigh the pros and cons. I just keep out of their way and they keep out of mine.
I have been DF'd before and I CHOOSE not to give them that power over me a second time.
Purza
Thanks all for the diverse set of perspectives. I thought my post would trigger something - but that was better than anticipated.
Don't get me wrong either, it does hurt and everyone is different, and I hope nobody takes offense to by crude ways. There is still lots of times I have to remind myself how wrong the WTBS is even after the final escape.
I was a lucky one,never had anyone close to me in the JW"s,so it was easy for me to leave.I DA myself and was very happy to do so.Over the past yr or so,I have lost a few friends because of the JW's but I don't let it affect my life or take me down.
Now loosing your children,parents and siblings,is a reason to hold on but I can't imagine the stress it causes for people who know all the BS involved with them.Imagine not being able to leave...what a tug-of-war!
For all those who have to keep involved in this cult,I feel for you and I hope someday you all find peace.
