This is your subconscious speaking... (page 2)

JamesThomas

Ya, the name plus the picture, it's a wonder there are any survivors.

j

Sentinel

I totally agree that the subconscious is very powerful. If we don't "listen" to the nudges, it will do whatever it must to make us "stop" and "think".

There were two periods of time where I was absolutely grounded, in that I was always like the Energizer Bunny, going, going, going. I pushed the things that bothered me back, back down inside. Then boom, I wasn't going anymore. I was home in bed for eight days at a time. Trips to the doctor proved nothing conclusive. Yet, I had horrid headaches, body aches, and slept all the time. I had vivid dreams and day and night-mares. I had visions and unusual experiences. I couldn't stay awake. Couldn't concentrate on anything around me in the real world--no reading, no TV. There was no way I could go to work, and my kind doctor gave me a slip that simply said "exhaustion" for the reason of my abscense. I didn't know what was happening, but in the sleep state, let's just say that I was being taught. I was made to listen. It was a cram course and I was the student and I couldn't get away. I had to complete the course. After two major events like this in one year, I began to re-evaluate my life on a grand scale. I made so many changes from the inside out. Then I had my epiphany.

It truly is a miracle, and this is the way I view it. I finally opened up the channel of communication with my creators, and I opened my heart and mind once again to many posibilities. I had been spiritually dormant, riding on the waves of simply existing since my exit from organized religion of the JW variety.

My life has truly changed.

/<

cyber-sista

SNG,

I remember talking with you before about having the throat syndrome. I had also being dealing with a lot of tightness and horseness along with being tongue tied and stuttering over words. It is something that came up with me during my exiting of the JWs. My therapist told me throat symtoms are based on fears--and not being able to speak well--I still haven't totally figured that out--probably just being disturbed and rattled. I also experienced pins and needles and numbness sensation throughout my body along with exhaustion--nothing medical has come up, but it come upon me during times of stress mostly the stress brought on by JW encounters. The psycologist tells me that stressful situations can at times bring on paralysis in different parts of the body--some being quite extreme.

At the end of my JW days (daze) I got extremely anxious and nauseous whenever I went to the KH and would need to leave the meeting early most of the time because of my symtoms.

Thinking back over the years I have known many who claim that they are allergic to the KH and have asthma/alergic attacks, etc when they go in there and some who have panic attacks at the hall too. One little girl used to break out in hives within minutes. I observed some of these same highly allergic people doing fine in other situations where there were alergens present.

I recall many who developed chronic fatique syndrome. One sister had to be in bed for several months almost in a catatonic state and they couldn't find anything wrong with her. I recall reading about someone on this site when finding out the truth about the JW religion was in such a state of shock and was unable to move and went to bed for weeks where he had to be spoon fed.

Since exiting the JWs I have had many dreams about my JW experience. Some of very interesting and rather cryptic in nature, but quite obvious that they are connected with my JW experinece and it is the subconscious trying to work through it and bring some understanding into my conscious world.

I have meant to do a topic on something like this as my subconscious mind also plays JW tricks on me at times, especially when I am tired or in a waking or half asleep state or when I am very tired. Sometimes my JW mind kicks in and tells me God is punishing me/ his spirit has left me especially when I am feeling badly or something is wrong in my life. I catch myself in these fleeting thoughts and shake myself. This is what i was told for so long that this is what would happen to me if I ever left I guess part of my mind is still believing that, but not the part that is awake.

Elsewhere

Toward the end I would become terribly depressed and tired anytime I was supposed to do something JW related... meetings, FS, etc...

Once I stopped doing these activities my mood lifted and my energy returned.

seattleniceguy

Hey cybersister,

Yeah, you're right. We have discussed this a bit before. That's interesting about the people who became "allergic" to the KH. I knew a lot of people with that syndrome. I wonder if you did a study, if Witnesses could be shown to have higher rates of chronic fatigue syndrome, allergies, and other miscellaneous, mystery disorders. It seems almost certain that they would, and that they would have on average worse mental health, just based on our anecdotal experieces.

Does anyone know of any research on this topic?

SNG

cyber-sista

My personal research has proven to me that JWs are a troubled lot and as has been mentioned before how many are on medication because of it. There is some research out there about JWs and mental health and some have shown that JWs have 4 times the the amount of certain serious mental illnesses than the average. I remember one CO about 7 or so years ago saying that it was shocking to him how many were now suffering from mental illness/depression/chronic fatique, etc. He said these things had increased greatly in the past years. Of course this was all blamed on the world conditions (and satan), which is probably true on some levels the world conditions and not the satan part), but that fact along with the increasing pressures of being a JW in the age of information. It is harder and harder to stuff it--to live a life in the state of denial is such a compromise of self. can see why so many JWs are troubled when they constantly hear their subconscious speaking, but they are warned not to listen to it (the heart being wicked--don't trust it--the corrupt imperfect flesh--and the whole independent thinking propaganda)

Narkissos

The first post of this thread strongly reminded me of Ingmar Bergman's movie Persona, about an actress who suddenly and inexplicably finds herself unable to speak in the middle of a play.

As a stutterer from childhood on (cf. Corvin's thread a few weeks ago) I often had to cope with my "subconscious" and its claims on my "JW-speaker life". I remember a case shortly before I was df'd, where I had to give a public talk on the trinity from a WT outline (after the "independent" public talks I usually preferred to give were banned). It was a painstaking experience such I had not known for years. I guess the whole thing was so alien to what I believed (although I wouldn't have thought of myself as a trinitarian and didn't consciously teach things contrary to what I believed) that I deeply rebelled against it.

Edited to add: this experience is NOT to be taken as a trinitarian argument!

Euphemism

Edited to add: this experience is NOT to be taken as a trinitarian argument!

LOL Would that be an argument against fallacious logic, or just an argument against boring your audience?

This is your subconscious speaking...

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