Funny grammatical errors by foreigners......

LDH

As you may know, I will laugh at you if you confuse:

your and you're
hear and here
their, there and they're
too and to.

I will also, laugh at syntax errors. (I know Java caught it, lol).

This rule only applies to fellow US-ers who should have a better command of the English language than they do!

However, I can't help but sometimes laugh at errors made by non-native people. English is a wacky language, and doesn't follow too many rules.

So please-don't anyone think I'm being prejudiced. I'd just like to start a thread of funny things I have seen or heard. (This includes people from any other country who have had a good laugh at us, as well.)

Please post any spelling or grammar error that is your pet peeve.
****************

One great source of laughs is any menu in any Chinese restaurant. One in particular caught my attention last week. The menu item was for Kung Pao chicken. It read:

Chicken nuts, cashews, celery in brown sauce.

I think they left out a comma.

Lisa

ha ha edited to correct a spelling error.

Billygoat

I don't know about the missing comma...I've heard that the Chinese may eat some pretty weird stuff! :)

Don't freak out...half my family's Chinese.

Billygoat

Maximus

Labadamized

Per say

Tow the line

Prolly

Funniest one lately is someone whose doctor told her she had a "high anal hernia." Really flummoxed us until we realized it was "hiatal."

To whoever wrote it, I can't remember, it is not my intention to poke fun. Actually it was on point, and I darn near fell out of my chair:

"Analize the Bible."

M

mustang

I decided to avoid ordering the shIrmp last time I was in the Chinese restaurant.

Mustang
who has some Chinese family also

COMF

Cool! Pedantic ol' me loves this stuff. Note, however, that there are no "foreigners" on this board, it being international from birth. Or else, Simon being a UKer, we Americans are among the foreigners!

Sign in a Japanese elevator: "Push button of wishing floor."

Sign in a store somewhere in Europe (I've forgotten what country): "We speak the English as she is goodly spocken."

But even more fun is to turn to colloquialisms whose original meanings have evolved, or downright disappeared. "Nip it in the butt," for example. Or, "I could care less," which, to make contextual sense, should be, "I couldn't care less."

I once overheard my brother's mother-in-law (a country gal if there ever was one) state emphatically, "I pacifically told her we would leave at 6:30 sharp." Well, I'm glad she didn't tell her aggressively.

Ever had anybody issue you an old tomato? (ultimatum)

I know lots of these, but they won't come to mind at the moment, dangit.

Pop quiz: syntactically, what's wrong with this sentence? (Or did you do it that way on purpose, and the humor was too subtle for me?)

I will also, laugh at syntax errors.

ZazuWitts

Our local newspaper found the following posted on a local church door entrance:

"TWELVE STEPPING BIG WOMAN GROUP IN BASEMENT - USE DOUBLE-WIDE DOORS AT BOTTOM OF STAIRS AND REMEMBER FIRST STEP IS BROKEN SO IGNORE IT.

Quite a play on words without even trying IMO, hahahahaha.

COMF

Good one, ZaZuWitts! I think the reporters do that stuff on purpose, though. One of my all-time favorites, from The Houston Post in about 1976, when the Pope was touring the world giving speeches:

"Bomb Thrown Before Pope Speaks"

Oddly, though, the article didn't reveal what the bomb said.

COMF

JanH

However, I can't help but sometimes laugh at errors made by non-native people. English is a wacky language, and doesn't follow too many rules.

Well, most Americans don't know any foreign languages, so they wouldn't know.

English is, for Europeans, reasonably easy to learn. However, it has some hidden subtleties that are hard to master. I know very well!

What amazes me is how horribly bad native English speakers (mostly Americans, I have to add) are in writing their own language. Sometimes i wonder if the majority are unable to distinguish between "their" and "they're". Those who have learned a number of foreign languages know it is never easy to learn a new language at an advanced age. But not being able to learn such basics about their own language... Sorry, I can't understand that (dyslectics, of course, excepted).

- Jan
--
Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel. [Ambrose Bierce, The Devil´s Dictionary, 1911]

fodeja

"its" vs. "it's"

"phenomenon" (singular) vs. "phenomena" (plural) - why does NOBODY get this right?!

"compatabile" (compatible)

"per say" (one of my favourites! - oh, Maximus already listed that one)

And lots of others that don't come to my mind right now.

Seems to me that non-native speakers (like me :-)) usually get the spelling right, but have trouble with grammar and common phrases. Sometimes grammar mistakes can indicate where the person is coming from: Scandinavians tend to make a lot of singular/plural related errors, for instance "Many people gets annoyed". Those from German speaking countries like to use "the" too often and concatenate words: english-lecture, spellingmistake.

f.

Kent

When a Norwegian goes to a restaurant ordering an underdone steak, or a rare steak, we use a word that if translated to Norwegian-English would be "Bloody".

So, this Norwegian came to a restaurant in New York and oredered a "Bloody Beef" - and the waiter looked at him for a while, then said:

Would you like some fuckin' potatoes as well?

Yakki Da

Kent

"The only difference between God and Adolf Hitler is that God is more proficient at genocide."

Daily News On The Watchtower and the Jehovah's Witnesses:
http://watchtower.observer.org

Funny grammatical errors by foreigners......

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