Why my view of the witnesses changed

by nevergotwet 16 Replies latest jw experiences

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  belbab

  Once after a circuit assembly in a public school auditorium when people were leaving and dismantling going on, I passed a man in a corridor leaning against a wall. He was sloppily dressed, unshaven and somewhat seedy looking, a derilect on hard times. . His eyes followed me as I passed by. I passed by going the other way after a few minutes. I stopped in surprise. I recognized. him. He was someone I had pioneered with a few years earlier. I told him wait a minute, and went and told the circuit servant. I said R.R. is out standing in the hallway. Can't we do something? He said he was disfellowshipped for something or other and leave him be. I went back and RR was gone. I never ever saw him again.

  I often think of this incident, some forty years back. It saddens me, I should have done something on my own and not gone to the CO

  belbab
• 

  DanTheMan

  I had an experience when I was fairly new to the dubs that got me wondering if these people were so great after all.

  A number of people from my cong got together one Sunday after the meeting to play softball at a local park.

  Almost from the time we started playing, there was this kid who was maybe 12 or 13 years old riding his bike around in the parking lot close to the ball diamond, he kept looking at us, it was obvious that he was dying for us to ask him if he wanted to play.

  I asked one of the guys who seemed to be "taking the lead" in the wholesome upbuilding activity we were engaging in if we could invite the kid to play.

  His response was so lame, I could hardly believe it. "Well, if we let him play then soon we'll have a bunch of other people wanting to play". The kid was by himself! There was nobody else around! The unspoken attitude seemed to be that somehow this "worldly" kid would contaminate our softball game. It was plain bloody ridiculous.

  And yet I stayed JW for long after that. Stupid me, there were so many red flags like that going off when I first got involved with JW's, but I guess it wasn't enough.
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  mamochan13

  reminds me of something that happened years ago at an assembly. On the pioneer session they had invited several up to give their accounts of how wonderful the auxiliary/temporary pioneer experience had been. one elderly sister was interviewed. She talked about how she had made arrangements to take a month to pioneer, etc. When asked what that month was like...she replied, honestly, "it was awful! I was so lonely. I asked people to go out with me and no one would. It was so hard to go out in service every day by myself. I never felt so lonely or isolated". You could hear a collective gasp from the audience and everyone shifted uncomfortably in their seats. How dare this person get up there and tell the truth about how awful her pioneer experience was!!

  I wanted to go up and hug this poor sister afterwards. But I knew she was telling the truth. One of the things that bothered me the most was the hierarchy. If you were part of the "in" crowd, you had plenty of support. If you were not, then "go be a witness by yourself". Elders, Elders' kids, elders wives, they had it all. Those of us who had no father in the religion, those who were single and alone - different story.
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  Maverick

  Welcome to the board!

  I thought the Elders and Servants were great until I became one. Sitting in my first meeting with those, lawnmen, window-washer, highschool nobodies cured me of thinking they were special! Mav
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  cbew

  Ditto Mav. The big change came for me when I was appointed an elder. I didn't want to be one in the first place but was pressured into the job by the CO, PO and everybody else on the elder body. I guess they were getting desperate. Anyways, what an eye opener! In all fairness though, I can say that there are some decent elders who do care about others and make some effort to help. These ones, like myself, were in that position by circumstances and not by choice. Then there are ones that are there simply for the power and prestige. These are the wannabee spiritual dictators and sadly more and more of these types get appointed. After 5 years on the body I finally saw enough to step down and eventually leave. Out and free now and no more crap to deal with.
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  Farkel

  Terry,
  
  : When you asked a question or made a statement that required an analytical response; the result was deflected. It wasn't dealt with. It was set off on a tangent and the issue was reframed.
  
  Precisely. Your dim bulb responder must have thought his answer was very clever. But to the trained observer, he made a total idiot of himself. Your question was about "dinosaurs", and he created a strawman to make it APPEAR as if your question was about "salvation." Dubs do that kind of stuff all the time, and get really pissed when it is pointed out to them. It's harder to keep a dub focused on the actual question or evidence than it is to get your average elder to lay off the bottle! And THAT is a hard thing to do!
  
  Red herrings and strawmen are part of the JW "spiritual" tool kit. As are ad hominems, poisoning the well, false dilemmas, special pleadings, argumentum ad populum, distinctions without differences, and all around Orwellian thinking.
  
  Come to think of it, the whole damn religion is one big logical and spiritual fallacy.
  
  Farkel
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  Maverick

  In line with what Farkel pointed out, if the JW's where in the Olympics, they would get all the gold metals for mental gymnastics! Mav