Dubs who shun those not DFed/DAed who fade (page 4)

shotgun

Hey Bro

The way it happened in congregations where I was either a pub or MS was usually two different scenario's....

There was the private gossip in the field service which filtered from those inthe know to those who speculated....this form of destructive critism marks someone subtly but marks them none the less. They are not invited to get-togethers or weddings because they are not putting Jah first...this unless it's known that they have a physical ailment...even then sometimes that is not enough to excuse regular attendance.

For the most part I did not see outright shunning unless someone had been df'd, da'd or reproved either publically.

Remember these dubs are swamped in meeting, study and service...the only contact they have is with ones who are regular....

Gotta run Gumby...BTW I'm not shunning you I've just been real busy of late

qwerty

Look at my situation..............Will abbreviate to make this concise.>

Me............ > Wife still JW, her family well indoctrinated for decades.......this is truth to her!, it's all she's known > Me faded for a number of years.

All going OK > wife understands my feeling's and sticks by what I think, (fantastic wife.. still loves me), I stick by her own adult decision to carry on doing what she's done from birth!

My wifes best friend (JW) known to my wife from young years and grown up both JW's. Her friend gets wedded to non JW, he thinks for himself and is a quick to learn.

I become good friends with my wifes friends husband.

I talk to him about how I don't see this is God's organization........... (over time) and a few of the pitfalls of being a JW (a few I say) LOL

He does research on the "wicked" internet about his wifes beliefs - then feeds what he knows to her! Starts to make thing a bit hard for her...... Belief wise.

He asks her to have word with me if she needs answers!

My wife gets to know and feeds this back to me and wants to know what I have said to friends husband ( by now me and him have become good mates and when had a few beers "talk about things"!)

What can I say?

I can't remember saying anything to make his wife life as a JW harder.

I find now she might suspect me of making her husband turn against JW's. I might have in some ways, just in general chat said why I don't go to meetings and bit more when had a drink, why JW's have not got it right.

ANYWAY.............

The point is now, I am detecting JW's in general from the local Cong (including my JW "BIG" Elder Father-in-law) not being the same with me over night, so to speak!

Will fill you in if this goes pear shaped....

Qwerty

qwerty

Gone for food ..............

Bye

gumby

Qwerty..(Love typing his name...it's easy)

Did you get your food yet?

I talk to him about how I don't see this is God's organization........... (over time) and a few of the pitfalls of being a JW (a few I say) LOL

So they get pissed you discussed your feelings about the Organisation, yet they can slam religion all day long in their publications and speech. Damn their a fair bunch, aren't they?

Gumby

XQsThaiPoes

My mom just commented on this. She bumped into a former elder. He was delete for getting drunk on a multi family jw vacation (the kinds that are not tours of newyork) and jumped into the pool naked. My mom wondered if he was DFed or stopped going to the meetings because she said when she met him he gave her the "why are you speaking to me?" look. I think many faders fade the wrong way. There are people with lousy rf & meeting attendance that have no intention of fading and nobody notices. It is that look of cautious and uneasiness that tips them off.

FlyingHighNow

My sister, her husband and one of her sons decided to shun me. This was last summer. I am not disfellowshipped or da'd. Her oldest son does talk to me though. A couple of weeks ago he told me that they tell him that they hate me, literally hate me and that he is stupid for speaking to me.

It hurts. I think I hurt more for them than for me though. I can't imagine being so confused. I never hated anyone who was dfd or da'd. I always loved people no matter what their status.

Flyin'

gumby

A couple of weeks ago he told me that they tell him that they hate me, literally hate me and that he is stupid for speaking to me.

Heather....so sorry to hear they feel this way.

I'm thankful none of my family feels this way about me..................( at least that I know of)

Gumby

qwerty

Gumby,

Yep, you understand,

they get pissed you discussed your feelings about the Organisation, yet they can slam religion all day long in their publications and speech. Damn their a fair bunch, aren't they?

Had food feel good! LOL

FlyingHighNow

Heather....so sorry to hear they feel this way.

Thank you, Gumby. Your empathy helps. I am glad your family doesn't hate you. They thought my brother in law had cancer that had spread and they never even so much as wrote me an e-mail.

Flyin'

FlyingHighNow

Woops. Double post. So I'll just delete it and then use it to give you another .

Flyin'

Dubs who shun those not DFed/DAed who fade

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