WHAT IF WE DIDN'T POISON CHILDREN'S MINDS WITH FANTASY? (page 12)

xenawarrior

woman what happens when your kids find out from some other kid that santa dosen't exist
and they confront you on it, or when you do finally break it to them then
they go into this what else are you hiding from me mood.
kids don't like being lied to period, even from mommy!!!
when I was growing I felt sorry for kids like yours.

What happens? Well, then the fantasy comes to an end a bit sooner than it would otherwise. No big deal.

You felt sorry for kids like mpatrick's? Or mine, since I told her the same thing? Why? Because they had a fantasy that brought them some wonderment and smiles? Or maybe it's the giggles when they see Santa that you feel sorry for.

then when they get older you suffer
tell them the truth or else watch that additude of not listening to you grow because their trust of you was abused.

Well, I'm sorry but you are just plain wrong. At least in my case. I didn't trust my mother any less because she told me there was a Santa. And my 16 year old daughter doesn't trust me any less because she I told here there was either. And you know what? My daughter listens to me quite well and she always has-even with the knowledge that Santa Claus isn't real. OMG the horror !! And you don't abuse a child's trust in you by giving them a fantasy of Santa Claus. Trust would be abused if you told them something harmful to them that wasn't true. There isn't any harm in Santa Claus. And I'd like anyone to prove to me that there is.

XW

Princess

Princess - My comment was not aimed at you, just a general comment after reading the thread, also I was thinking of one of the mothers at the school my kids go to who insists that her kids believe ! . No offense intended sorry, I should have made it clearer.

I wasn't sure but I wanted to make my point clearer anyway. I only used the eye roller 'cause you did. No offense taken.

woman what happens when your kids find out from some other kid that santa dosen't exist
and they confront you on it, or when you do finally break it to them then
they go into this what else are you hiding from me mood.

Dude, your first mistake was addressing her as "woman". I hope she blasts you good, you deserve it.

edited so I wouldn't be edited by a mod

StinkyPantz

Dude, your first mistake was addressing her as "woman". I hope she blasts your a$$ good, you deserve it.

I hate when guys do that! The tone is usually said like "woman" is an insult.

Not editing.. oops.. I guess I did "edit" by putting "not editing".. but I'm not fixing Princess' original post cuz I like it better

mpatrick

woman what happens when your kids find out from some other kid that santa dosen't exist
and they confront you on it, or when you do finally break it to them then
they go into this what else are you hiding from me mood.
kids don't like being lied to period, even from mommy!!!
when I was growing I felt sorry for kids like yours.
then when they get older you suffer
tell them the truth or else watch that additude of not listening to you grow because their trust of you was abused.

Don't feel sorry for my children, if what you say ever happens...I love them enough to get them the best therapy money can buy...LOL! I doubt that will be necessary since I can't recall even one adult suffering from believing in Santa as a child.

Wow, I feel empathy when I see children with tattered clothes and worn out shoes, and children that show obvious neglect or sexual abuse...not for kids that believe in Santa.

Are people's priorities that messed up that they are more consumed with the effects that fantasy "may" have on their children then with real problems children may face?

mpatrick

Dude, your first mistake was addressing her as "woman".

I am "woman", hear me ROAR!

xenawarrior

I doubt that will be necessary since I can't recall even one adult suffering from believing in Santa as a child.

I dunno mpatrick- I have this unusual "tic". Maybe THAT is where it came from !! I always thought it was a nervous condition stemming from dealing with too much reality!! Geez, now I find out that it's from believing in Santa Claus !!

mpatrick

XW,...LMAO

Mac

Wow...

Lotsa emotion triggered by belled toes and red suits!

Here is my take for all it's worth: (yeah, yeah, yeah, I know what my opinion is worth cuz I had it appraised at the Antique Road Show...and let me tell ya...some things don't appreciate with age).

Personally I love Christmas but, my children were already too old for the Santa and Bunny stories so, I never had to deal with any of that...all I had to deal with was trying to convince them that we were not going to die because of an evergreen placed in the middle of our living room after so many years of affirming it were so...Armageddon was a far more challenging fantasy to displace and come to terms with, I imagine.

I can't say for sure, having never celebrated Christmas or any other of these grand occasions for bringing together family and friends as a young'n myself, that I would or would not have passed on the fantasy that I may have possibly inherited from my parents if I'd not been born into a Witness environment.

My gut reaction is that I would not. I don't like the idea of having to break it to my child that I've instilled, knowingly, a deception in their minds...yet.......I have to ask myself..Is this just a remnant of all the conditioning and "fine logic" that was force fed me the first part of my life?

Well...here is what I,m leaning toward...if these illusions and games are so very detrimental to the healthy maturation and development of a child..if these "LIES" from the past are so scarring to ones psyche...why the hell would parents continue to hand down, generation after generation, that which must be so hurtful and dangerous? We all want our children to suffer..right? I just can't bring myself to believe that to be the case, sooooooo..........

Bring on the tooth fairy...a quarter never hurt anybody!!

macsanta (if I ever have grandchildren)

meggidon555

<=== you wanna lie to that, go ahead ain't my kid!

Dude, your first mistake was addressing her as "woman".

I am "woman", hear me ROAR!XW,...LMAO

ur ,Still a christian Hehehe So turn the table what happens when yours kids lie to you ? they are going to have that view of you as a hypocrite. You will give them a mistrust of authority. Would jesus lie to your kids we he allow it in his name? Is lying showing love to them? I thought even you outside the org christians were supposed to be honest in everything? yes, I changed it alot I cooled off thought it all out.

outbutnotdown

Well, it seems like a good amount of my posts refer to the comparison between my ex's JW family's theories on raising children and my own non-JW theories..... and here's another perfect opportunity.

I can't really say exactly how my ex treats the kids, but if it was the way that she was when we were together, it is usually a high stress time for them.... lots of strict rules, absolutes, punishments, etc., with little praise. So when the kids are with me, I always make sure they are safe, but aside from that, I just let them be as free and peaceful as possible. They role play and create numerous imaginary friends/creatures, so it would seem to me that fantasy is a very natural part of life. Keeping that fantasy world from them must stunt their mind development.

Irregardless of the deeper psychological reasoning, they are very happy in their own little fantasy world..... so how bad can that be?

I haven't really read too many of your posts, Terry, but maybe you should lighten up a bit on your kids. That's not meant to be rude, but just let them believe what they want. It is THEIR reality, after all.

B.

WHAT IF WE DIDN'T POISON CHILDREN'S MINDS WITH FANTASY?

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