So much for "fading"... we're out! (page 3)

codeblue

(((Dave and Gina)))

I read your thread with great interest, as myself and NOdenial are fading too.

It is hard to be a "double agent"........While I have no parents alive, I do have some siblings and a couple of adult children to deal with and we live thousands of miles away. (I am glad they aren't here where I live).

Recently a couple of my siblings found out we viewed the UN website..........the one treated me like Nazi Hitler, even hung up the phone on me (I cried for 2 weeks), I have made a vow not to contact her again, she was the rude one hanging up (they think they can say anything they want to me, but I can't express my views???). The other one was "nice" about her inquisition, so with her I was able to talk about not only the UN issue (she brought it up) but with my many moves the "lack of love" within many congregations (which shows they aren't producing the fruit of a true religion) and the Dateline of May 2002 exposing the pedophile issue within the WTBS (I told her that is hypocrisy because they condemned the Catholic Church for pedophiles and the WTBS is no different. I told her that we are suppose to worship with "spirit and truth" and with the hypocrisy I have found that is not accord to worshipping with spirit and truth). She kept treating me like I was a child by saying: "I am very concerned about you" and "you shouldn't go to apostate sites"...geez, the UN site isn't apostate, they don't get it because they are told anything that doesn't agree with the WTBS is apostate!!!! So a couple of siblings ripped me apart....so much for fading...(they probably just think I am very "weak"...

I think there comes a time when you just have to stand up for what you believe is right, no matter what the cost. I know I did this many times when I was a "staunch JW" because I thought I had the truth(tm). Now with the table of knowledge comes a great turn around or spiralling where again, because of realizing what really is "truth" I will have to make a stand. I have been trying to avoid it like you guys have as well. Maybe I too will have a thread like yours in the future..But for now, I can't stand the thought of my 2 adult children totally avoiding me....

It is indeed tiring to always be watching for the JW FBI................lol...I love that phrase....but is is true!!!

Anyways, the "conditional love" our JW's family show us is appalling......and I am so sorry that you both are experiencing this....I know it hurts a lot. Do you live close enough to visit any of the board members? It helps to visit with ones that have went thru this process.

I hope today is a better day for you both.

hugs,

CodeBlue

iiz2cool

Recently a couple of my siblings found out we viewed the UN website..........the one treated me like Nazi Hitler, even hung up the phone on me

As a group JWs claim to have the 'truth' yet I've never seen people who are more afraid of 'truth' than JWs. What's wrong with going to the UN web site? Is it apostate? NO! Does the Bible forbid it? NO! Has the Watchtower explicitly forbidden its members from viewing the UN web site? NO!

They live in terror of anything that may cause them to question anything about the cult. They fail to realize that real 'truth' should be able to withstand a critical examination.

I was originally going to fade, but I lacked the patience to do it successfully. I also lacked the ability to keep my mouth shut. Leaving has had its challenges, but is worth it. I wish I did it sooner.

Walter

codeblue

Walter,

I really appreciate your comments here. Everything you said is true.

I kept telling her the UN website is not apostate. She kept saying: "yes it is, we are told not to use the internet". I asked her, "why does the WTBS have a website then if the internet is apostate?" Her reply: "so they can tell the truth"...I replied: "well, I guess the WTBS will be sueing the UN then if it is NOT true that they were a member". She had no response to that comment.

It is amazing the denial they are in....but until something breaks their "rose colored glasses".....they will never know they are in denial. For each person it is different.

CodeBlue

franklin J

hang in there,

based on experience, I can tell you it is a bumpy road--BUT WELL WORTH IT. Do not look back. Make new freinds on the OUTSIDE; and go with the flow. It may take a while to settle down. But the fog will lift.

Remember that it will be easier for your kids to adjust.

good luck, you will do fine,

Frank

iiz2cool

She kept saying: "yes it is, we are told not to use the internet".

I wonder if she could show you which watchtower or scripture forbids using the internet. Watchtower articles have discouraged use of the internet, but none have forbidden it. She is "going beyond what is written." I used to have plenty of elders bothering me to fix their computers when they had trouble accessing the internet.

I also asked people, while I was still in, why the society didn't try to sue the UN if the posted document is false. They're very quick to use the courts to their advantage any other time when it's in their interests. No one could ever answer that. One person speculated that the document was put on the UN site by apostate hackers.

It's scary to realize that I was once as closed-minded as them. You're right, it is different for every person. For me it was the child abuse scandal. But I may not have even believed that had it not been for the fact that a close family member was a victim of child sexual abuse, and the elders covered it up. A lot of JWs I knew thought the abuse scandal was just anti-JW propaganda created by a demon-inspired media.

Walter

codeblue

Walter....ditto for me on the child abuse scandal, it woke me up.

I saw the Dateline 2002 on the pedophile issues in the WTBS, and only the last 10 mintues....when I heard how many suits were against the WTBS, I realized their hypocrisy. I could no longer in good faith, share in the door to door work.

I have a life long friend, an elder's wife share her experience how her oldest son was sexually abused in his teens. But they NEVER found out until his 30's. He turned to drugs and lost his wife. As good JW parents they were confused why he would do drugs. In his 30's he told them....She shared this info to me just before the Dateline 2002 aired...I can only imagine her pain and her son's pain, for the elder body knew what happened to their teenage son, but nothing was said to them as his parents (how wrong is that??? )

CodeBlue

Carmel

I've chatted with my "unknowable essense" and He/She tells me Gina will be doing fine after a few trials and tribs.

carmel

BrendaCloutier

{{{{{{{ Dave and Gina and Kids }}}}}}}}}

Blessings and prayers to you all. It's a real cryin' shame that the right way for some creates so much pain. I'm sorry you have to experience it. I'm happy you've stopped living the lie.

Take care, and know that you'll be OK inspite of 'em.

Brenda

willyloman

My heart goes out to both of you and you have our full sympathy and cyber support, too. I second the motion made by someone else that this too shall pass and your life will only get better. You have broken the hold they had on you by realizing only you can give them that control. Now you're free. You will relish your freedom and thank God for it. Your children, by the way, will love their new life. Be sure to fill it with happiness, joy and fun.

In time, you simply won't care what "they" say or do. So, go. Live life. Make friends. It's a wonderful world.

hubert

((((Dave and Gina))))

Glad to hear you are out. Work together on this. Be happy for your children's future. You are doing the right thing. You have our support, and everybody elses in this forum. Things will get easier with time. My wife and I will pray it that it does, soon.

Hubert

So much for "fading"... we're out!

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