They simply won't allow a lawyer to be present.
You DON'T Have To Listen To The Elders If They Say They Want To Meet ....
by minimus 40 Replies latest jw friends
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MelbaToast
Sure you dont HAVE to go to the JC. I wouldn't reccomend it to anyone with any emotional problems. Every time I remember being in a JC (even when I accused someone else of a wrongdoing) they played the good cop, bad cop, to the point of extremes. The last JC I was in when I was being publicly reproved was enough to sour my taste for mans judgement, thats for sure.
When they decided to cast the last stone, they informed me that they needed to meet. I said sure! They met on a wed night at 6, waiting for a long time, I hope. I never showed.
The night afterward, the service meeting, they let everyone know I was disfellowshipped due to unrepentance from my sin. I didn't have to be there, and my mother came to my house crying, like I was dead. So started the shunning, and my mom and dad didnt speak to me for a year.
Their loss.
my .02 Melba
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omegaone
Simply put, a JC is just a 21st century term to replace the term witch hunt.A person must realize that if they choose to go to these things they are telling themselves that even tho I do not agree with the WTBS claptrap I still want to remain approved to stay in the org.which is why I am here.Put yourself thru the hoops for these "men" and do what they say and simply lay aside all your dignity and self worth and the JC will have served what it was set up to do:Make you submit to an authority that rules every aspect of your life and holds the keys to life and death.You cannot disagree with it and stay a JW.It is that elementary.If you decide to leave write a letter saying you want nothing more to do with this religion and no further meetings are needed. Someone once said that what is easily understood should not need discussion.These JC serve no purpose to someone who really wants to leave as they are not needed to leave.Their purpose is to only degrade someone who wants to stay in for various reasons but does not have the true desire to leave.It just boils down to whether you have the ability to take control of your life and leave and not look back and regret it or submit yourself to an authority who will control it for you.
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frankiespeakin
I wholly recomend the lawyer thingy I think the WT doesn't want anymore lawsuits than it already has to deal with. Even if you really don't have a lawyer bluff them.
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JH
When I faded years ago, I rathered to not answer the door to the elders if they came over. I always thought that if I opened the door and the elders were there, I had no other choice than to let them in and question me, or else be DF'd.
When I joined the JW's, I was well indoctrinated, thinking that the elders were almighty and that I had no other choice but to say "yes" whenever they wanted to speak to me or come over.
I always feared them.
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Jim_TX
minimus said - They simply won't allow a lawyer to be present.
It doesn't matter. I don't have a lawyer. They don't know that, though. The point to telling them you want your lawyer present is that it is going to be 'legal' proceedings that are going to be going on, and you want your legal representative there.
frankliespeakin said - I wholly recomend the lawyer thingy I think the WT doesn't want anymore lawsuits than it already has to deal with. Even if you really don't have a lawyer bluff them.
Exactly! That's the point. They don't want lawyers around when they hold 'kangaroo-court' - and I'll bet they would back down really quick if you tossed in a "...and I'll bring legal proceedings against anyone who slanders my name in my absense (aka disfellowshipping)".
The point is - come at 'em full-force... not in a wimpy... "ohhh... I guess this means I'll be reproved... or disfellowshipped" (At this point you shouldn't care anymore, anyway).
Then just listen to their footsteps fade into the distance as they trip over themselves fleeing.
Regards,
Jim TX
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Poztate
Personally for me, its very touchy, because even though I dont recognize their authority, they still control my family.
This is a problem for many of us on this board. The WT has complete mind control of my family.To get out cleanly I have to be prepared to sacrifice any family I have. Many would say if family can't accept me then f*^k them but that is a huge step to take and one I am not willing to take for now.
I keep a low profile and so far have not been on any notice to appear before a JC. If it does ever happen perhaps because of new light? I will rethink my options then.
I do believe that over the next few years the elders will make more of an attempt at weeding out the mal-contents and"sinners" in their midst.The internet with all the true facts out there will almost make this inevitable.They need to build a big wall to keep the outside world away and to keep the sheep? in the pen.
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Pole
A person must realize that if they choose to go to these things they are telling themselves that even tho I do not agree with the WTBS claptrap I still want to remain approved to stay in the org.which is why I am here.
This is precisely why I feel I'm never going to meet them at this stage. (I'm never going to go to a meeting either). Meeting them is part of their game, it's their fake guns which used to inspire fear in me before I fully understood the truth about "the truth". Like JH, I used to be conditioned to fear meetings with elders and I used to respect their "authority".
Actually I think fading (if it doesnt cost you too much emotionally) and refusing to meet elders is one of the very few cases that elders can't handle very well in a strict and systematic way. I gives them trouble, because they never know if you're an apostate already or just "a spiritually weak" but faithful sheep.
Pole
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minimus
Don't validate the elders!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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gespro
Minimus-
I don't know your background but it's safe assume you've resolved your inner conflicts with the dubs. I commend you!
Alot of us who are in some form of recovery [my recovery is based on the 12-step program - affective to a major extent for me] go through a process to find the source of our dis-ease. I like to confront it and resolve it. I'm not validating these FOOLS but, I am confronting and conquering my fears by being able to face these FOOLS and watch them scuffle and be uncomfortable about their bogus proceedures. Do you see how this could help others or are you into invalidating an approach that didn't originate from you. I'm sorry, I'll back off. Is it possible for you to be empathetic? This seems to be lacking on these boards and not necessarily from you....
They can't force you to listen to them or engage in dialogue with them. Don't be afraid of the elders. They're only "men".
Minimus, we're on the same team though. I do agree with you and I don't want to be too biligerent but I am a sensitive person [on several levels] and I don't want to be misunderstood.
thanks for letting me share on your thread...
gespro - still angry