How did you feel when you learned it was all a lie?

what_Truth?

bit of background. I grew up as a JW I left the church when I was 14 because a ministerial servant who was conducting a one on one Baptism study with me said that I couldn't ballance my dreams of being a professional singer with the so called "truth". I stopped the study and told my mom I no longer wanted to be a witness. I still beleived the teachings mind you, however I decided it was better to die in armageddon living your dreams then it was to spend all eternity miserable in a paradise. two years later I met a former ministerial servant who broke down all for me. He even accuratly predicted them ditching the 1914 date 6 months before it happened. I remember his hand where shaking when he showed me the page about the prophet house in the insight book, the class action lawsuit they filed with Jimmy Swaggart described in the NY times, and showed me the scriptures that proved they were liars. I think he was scared that I would shun him or rat him out as an apostate. I didn't of course, and if I find out what became of him I will look him up and thank him. It was the strangest feeling in the world. On one hand I felt like a fool. How can something that seemed so blatently obvious your whole life turn out be a lie? On the other hand I also felt a freedom I could never describe. For the first time since I left I realised that I wasn't wicked for cursing or having a girlfriend. I realised it was okay to have a purpose in your life rather than just spend it all knocking on doors. I could go to college without having to worry that God was going to snuff me in the middle of my studies. In the 10 years since I have never been to the Kingdom Hall, except once to attend my sister's wedding. I am hapilly married to a beautiful worldly woman. I'm happy to know that my two little girls will never have to go through the same shit that I did growing up. but enough about me, how did you feel?

shamus

One word;

Horrible. It was a grieving process. Everything that I worked for was complete and utter nonsense.

frenchbabyface

betrayed (but most over because of a special issue) and good at the same time ... things made sense for once (with the truth about the JW truth) and made me feel really free from lots of litlle bullshit that were stiking to my mind !

Satanus

Nauseous, then the grief, then the freedom.

S

Little Red Hen

Validated.

Gill

Very angry at first and then a little less so.

Finally, very relieved that it was all rubbish and then very happy.

flower

shocked, sickened, angry, depressed, angry, really really angry, pissed off, even more pissed off, acceptance, happy to be free.

blondie

I wondered why I let myself be fooled for so long.

Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

Blondie

evergreen

To be honest with u , i was confused after discovering the true history of the WTS. I was more annoyed than anything else, because my whole life could have been so different.

Right from the day i was baptized, i always felt something wasn't right ; always the doubts ,the what ifs etc.

But now i have made my mind up not to attend anymore,I feel a sense of freedom that i can now controll my own activities.No more being controlled by the guys in NY.

LittleToe

In just about the following order, as I recell:
Stunned / annoyed / grief stricken / accepting / revolutionary / demoralised / acceptance / terror stricken on anticipation of leaving then complete peace just prior to doing it.

Then I left and the grieving started again...

How did you feel when you learned it was all a lie?

Share this